Catherine Price: Hi, David.
凯瑟琳·普莱斯:你好,戴维
David Biello: Hello.
戴维•比埃罗:你好
CP: And hello, everyone.
凯瑟琳·普莱斯:大家好
DB: I think we need to start with the question that some of them may have seen on their screen already: what is fun?
戴维•比埃罗:我想我们 可以开始了, 部分人已经在屏幕中看到 这个问题了。 什么是快乐?
CP: You might think that we all know what fun is, but I found it really interesting in my research to realize that the way we use fun in our everyday speech, which at least in English, is very casual, we kind of toss around this word. It's really different from the feeling you get from people if you ask them about a memory from their own lives in which they had the most fun. And as part of the research for my book, I did that. I asked people from all around the world, I see we have a ton of people from all around the world, even in this webinar. So the answers I got were very international. And it was really interesting because even though obviously people's individual experiences were different, there was this energy running through them that was very much the same. And when I read through these answers, and I’ve got thousands of these by now, I found myself smiling but also almost tearing up a lot of times. There was something really powerful about what people were sharing with me that went way beyond this lighthearted pleasure sense with which we often use the word.
凯瑟琳·普莱斯:或许我们认为 大家都知道快乐是什么 但是在我的研究中我 发现了一点非常有趣: 我们在日常说话中使用幽默 的方式非常随意, 至少在英语中是这样, 我们总是在这个词上翻来覆去。 这和你从别人那里得到的 感觉却不一样, 如果你问他们生活中 最快乐的记忆是什么, 作为这本书研究 的一部分,我做到了。 我调研了全世界的人们, 我知道我们有很多来自 世界各地的朋友, 即使是线上研讨会 所以我得到的答案非常国际化。 这真的很有趣。 因为即使每个人 的个人经历都有所不同, 但他们身上所具有 的活力是一样的。 但我阅读这些答案的时候,我的 脑海里已经有了成千上万的答案。 我发觉自己在笑, 但更多时候却是在流泪。 人们与我分享的东西有着 非常强大的力量, 远远超出了我们平常使用这个词时 轻松愉快的感觉。
So I ended up coming up with a definition based on these stories people were sharing with me and then running it by them to see if it accurately described what they had told me. So I tried to validate it. And it is that when we have these moments of what I think of as “true” fun, it's the confluence of three states. And those are playfulness, connection and flow.
所以我基于这些分享给我的故事 总结了快乐的定义, 然后再向她们讲述看看他们所说的 是否真实。 于是我尝试去证实这件事。 当我们拥有这些被认为是真正的 快乐的瞬间的时候, 是受三种状态的影响。 分别为嬉戏, 联系和流动。
And so if you think of a Venn diagram with three circles in the center, you have true fun, and then playfulness, connection and flow. And just to clarify, because people can freak out in particular about playfulness, adults really get uncomfortable with playfulness. It means just having a lighthearted attitude. You can just be lighthearted, not care too much about the outcome of what you're doing. Let go of your perfectionism.
如果你想一个中有三个圆 的维恩图, 你有真实的快乐,接着是 玩笑,接触和心流。 只是为了澄清一下,因为人们 可能会特别担心嬉戏, 成年人总是对玩笑感到不适, 意思是只需要有个乐观的态度 你可以轻松一下 不要太在意你做的事情 会带来什么后果 不要执着于你的完美主义
Connection refers to having a special shared experience, and I do think some people can have fun on their own, as I say in my TED Talk. But it was really interesting because most of the stories people told me involved other people. And when I asked people, "What surprised you about what you just told me?" A number of people said something along the lines of “I’m an introvert, but everything I just told you involved other people." So in the majority of situations, another person is involved.
接触可指某段特别的经历 有些人能有他们独属的快乐 就像我在TED里说的 但是这真的很有趣 因为人们告诉我的故事里 很多都参与了其他人 当我问人们“告诉我这些后 最让你感到惊喜的是什么?” 一部分所告诉我 的人都指自己是内向者 但是他们说的事物都参与了其他人 所以在大多数情况下都有他人的参与
And then flow is this psychological state where we get so wrapped up in what we're doing, actively engaged in what we're doing that we can lose track of time. So an athlete playing a game is the most quintessential example.
接着便是心流 从心理上说 人们试图用所做的行为来包装自己 花了很多时间来积极参与 最典型的例子就是参赛中的运动员
All three of those states are great on their own but I believe when you experience all three at once, that’s what I call true fun.
这三个情形都有各自的优点 但我相信当你在同一时间里 一起体验了这三个情形 那便是真正意义上的快乐
DB: So to the adult question of why we lose playfulness, well, I think some of it is because fun can seem maybe frivolous in a very serious world, and the world is quite serious. But why is it important to have fun?
DB:对于成年人的疑问 为什么会没有玩笑 因为玩笑在这个严肃的世界里 显得轻浮 及这个世界是很严肃的 但是为什么拥有快乐很重要
CP: Thanks for asking that question, David, because that is a common misperception people have about fun is that it is frivolous or that, you know, there are so many serious things going on in the world, how can we possibly think about fun? So a couple of things I would say to that. First of all, life is not zero-sum. I don't see why you can't be someone who cares about the serious issues in the world and also cares about fun. And also, a lot of what we do when we say we're "caring about serious issues" is really kind of meaningless and just torturing ourselves. If you read the same news article that makes you upset six times in an hour, you haven't actually helped anybody. And the same thing if you've posted a rant on social media or gotten into an argument or just worked yourself up or essentially yelled at someone on Twitter. That didn’t actually help anybody. And it's very draining. So what I find about fun is that when we actually have fun -- my point being here is that fun can actually help us work to solve some of those problems. And the reason I say that is that, first of all, when you have enough fun yourself, it actually fills up your own reserves, it builds your resilience and your energy. And that will give you the energy to do something more productive than just yell at people via your phones, social media accounts. But then also, if you actually have fun with other people and you've connected with them as human beings, so if we're able to have fun with each other, we can connect in a way that then helps us work together to actually solve some of those problems.
大卫 谢谢你的提问 因为大多数人们对快乐都有误解 是否过于轻浮 你知道的 这世上有很多重要严谨的事物 我们怎么可能觉得快乐 有两件我想说的事 第一, 生活的总和不是零 我没有看见为什么你无法成为某人 在意世上重要严谨事物的人 也会在意快乐 以及 我们所做和所说的: “在意重要严谨的事物” 仅是无意义和折磨 如果你在一小时里 读了六篇让你伤心的文章 事实上你并没有帮助到任何人 对比于你在社交媒体上发布了指责 或者卷入了某个争执 或者激发自己 或者必要时在推特上吼了某人 这些都无法帮到任何人 这也使人疲惫 所以我觉得快乐就是 当我们真的觉得快乐 我指的是这份快乐于我们有帮助 用来解决一些问题 我这么说的原因是 当你足以自娱 其实也保留了你自己 帮助你自愈和恢复你的能量 这会给你能力产生高效率 对比于你通过手机, 社交媒体账号嘶吼别人 但是 如果你和别人都觉得愉快 代表着你和人群连接了 所以彼此都能感到愉快 我们可以通过一起工作 去解决一些问题
And then I would also say fun isn't frivolous. Even if the world was great and there weren't any problems, fun itself is not frivolous -- and I'm happy to go into more detail if anyone wants more detail, but is actually really important not just for our mental health, but also for our physical health because of the way it reduces our stress levels and also provides us with a sense of social connection.
以及,我想说玩笑并不轻浮 即使这世界很好也没有任何问题 玩笑本身并不轻浮 如果想详细的了解,我很开心去述说 但是这对我们的心理健康其实很重要 生理健康亦是 因为快乐可以减轻我们的压力 也可以让我们有社交联系
DB: Yeah, fun is good for your health. I think that's the important thing to remember. But as you pointed out, we shouldn't get to wrapped up maybe in anxiety about whether we're having enough fun. You also talk about something called “fake” fun. What's that?
DB:对 ,快乐对健康很重要 我觉得这很重要需要去谨记 据你指出 我们不应该掩饰自己的焦虑 关于我们是否真的有足够的快乐 你也指出了“虚假”的快乐 那是什么
CP: So fake fun is a term I came up with to describe products and services that are marketed to us as fun but that aren't actually fun in the sense that they don't actually produce playfulness, connection or flow. The biggest culprit here is definitely social media and kind of -- or passive consumption past the point of enjoyment. So if you're watching your favorite show for a couple episodes, great. But if you're like, in that zone where you're actually completely hypnotized and seven hours have past and you feel disgusting about yourself and your life, you've fallen into the trap of fake fun. So I see it as there being actually three categories. You’ve got true fun, the playful connected flow. You’ve got fake fun, which is essentially the junk food of our leisure time. It’s very appealing, but it leaves us feeling disgusting about ourselves. There's a big middle category of stuff that's truly enjoyable, but that wouldn't necessarily qualify as true fun by the definition I've proposed. And that would be things like reading, you know, or like taking a bath or watching your favorite TV show up to the point where it's still enjoyable. To me, those are all legitimate great uses of your leisure time, even if they're not fun because you know you actually enjoy them. And the reason I think it's important to think so intellectually about fun is that it helps us become much more intentional about how we use our leisure time.
CP:虚假的快乐 是我用来形容产品和服务 营销给我们的快乐 但这都不是真正的快乐 意涵我们并没有真正的 得到玩笑,接触和心流 真正的起因于社交媒体定义于某种 或者被动使用的娱乐设施 当你看了几集自己喜欢的节目这很棒 但你就像,在那个时段你完全沉迷了 七个小时过去了 你觉得对自己和生活厌恶了 你便掉进了虚假快乐的陷阱里 所以我看到了这其实分为三个类别 你真正的开心,玩笑连接了流动 你虚假的开心 因为闲暇时享用了 不可或缺的垃圾食品 显而易见 这使我们有厌恶自己的感觉 有一大中间类别的事物属实使人愉快 但那不能真正定义为快乐 以我提倡的意义 比如阅读,你知道的 或者洗个澡 或者看你喜欢的电视节目 以上都使人愉悦 于我,这些都是合理消遣休闲时间的 即使它们本身不愉快 但你知道你其实很享受 及理智性的,我觉得 快乐最重要的原因是 它可以让我们有意识的 了解怎么使用闲暇时间
So if you're able to identify sources of fake fun in your life, it's actually really easy to eliminate those once you've kind of cognitively recognized that you know it's a waste of time. And if you're like, "Oh yeah, this is actually enjoyable," go for it. And then if it's likely to generate true fun, I would suggest putting it on the top of your priority list because it's such a wonderfully nourishing state.
所以如果你能够辨别 生活里的虚假快乐 就很容易的消除 当你有这个认知就可以 知道那是在浪费时间 如果你觉得, “对,这的确很享受,” 那你便去做吧 要想制造真正的快乐 把它放在你的优先待办事项 因为那是段充实自我的阶段
DB: TED Member Don and Stephania are, you know, feel slightly overwhelmed by their lives and have trouble even thinking of what fun feels like. If you've forgotten what fun feels like, how do you find it again?
DB:TED会员 Don 和Stephanie,你知道的 有些感觉被生活击垮 及有困难去思考什么是快乐 如果你忘了快乐是什么 感觉,你会怎么去找寻?
CP: One of the things I recommend people do to start is to think back on a moment of true fun from your own life, a moment that you describe as "so fun." That was the term I came up with when I was asking people this question. Don't worry, it can actually take a little bit of time to tune in to those experiences, but I can assure you we've all had them. They don't need to be dramatic. This is another misconception we have about fun, that it only can happen in exotic locales or when you're somehow outside of your "normal life" or that it costs a lot of money. None of that is true. If you define it as playful connected flow, you'll start to recognize that you can have even tiny moments of fun all the time.
CP:其中一件我鼓励人们去做的是 回想感到真正快乐的回忆 一段你可以形容“很开心”的回忆 当有人问起,这是我每次回答的话 不用担心,这需要一点时间 去明白那些经验, 但我保证我们都会拥有 他们不需要太戏剧性 另一个对于快乐的误解是, 它只发生在异域风情的外国场景里 或当你在“正常生活”外 或者给予大量金钱 以上皆不对 当你定义快乐为玩笑连接心流, 你开始认知你有微小的快乐 各个时刻
And the reason you want to call to mind one of these experiences is that, as you begin to think of more of them, so I encourage you to try to think of more than one, and it will become easier as you start thinking of them, to call out some themes and see are there any particular people who are often involved? Are there any activities that are involved? Are there any settings that seem conducive to fun? Because if you’ve seen my TED Talk, you know that I believe that fun is a feeling and it’s not an activity. By which I mean that, I think too often we start to think, like, if I asked you guys what's fun, just at the beginning of this conversation, you might start to give me a list of activities that you enjoy. Cooking's fun or reading or whatever, but the activity itself is not fun. It's the feeling of fun. Like, you can love dinner parties and have the exact same group of people over for dinner and eat the exact same thing. And one night it's going to be really fun and one night it's not. So it's the feeling that results. So the point of calling out these settings and these people and activities that are often associated with fun for you is not to guarantee that you can have fun if you're with them, but to set the scene for it to make it more likely that fun will occur in result. I think about it like romance, like you can set the scene for it, but if you try too hard, it's going to run away, right? So we’re trying to light candles for fun. But I call the settings and the people and the activities our fun magnets, and each of us has a collection that is unique to us, you know. My husband's fun magnets are not necessarily the same as mine. We have some that we share, some that are different. And the point is just to become more cognizant of what those things are so again, you can become more intentional about how you choose to spend your leisure time.
及你想铭记于心的体会是 你开始经常思考 所以我建议你尝试去想多于一个 这便会让你轻易的开始思考 呼出这些主题 及看看那有经常参与出现的人吗? 或是经常参与的活动吗? 或任何设定以益于快乐 因为你看了我的TED会谈 你了解我所相信的快乐 是种感觉而不是活动 我指,我觉得,我们经常开始去想 比如,我问大家什么是快乐, 就在交谈的开头, 你可能开始举出你享受的活动 烹饪的快乐或阅读或是其他, 但活动本身不是开心, 它是快乐的感觉 比如,你喜欢晚宴派对 和同阶的人们共进晚餐 吃一样的东西 一晚是真正的很开心但另一晚不是 所以它是一种感觉的结果 这些设置呼之欲出的是人和活动 能让你联想到快乐的 并不是保证和他们在一起便能感到快乐, 而是组织出这场景, 让它变成最终会出现的快乐。 我觉得这很像罗曼史, 比如你可以组织这场景, 但若是用力过度,便变味了 所以我们尝试轻松惬意的只为了快乐 但我将设置和人们 及活动看作了快乐的磁铁 及我们每个人有自己独特 的收集,你知道的 我老公的快乐磁铁并不一定与我一样 我们有共享的点,也有不一样的 这些点会有更多的认知它们是什么 再次,你变得更加有意识 关于你如何选择去消耗 自己的空闲时间
I also created a whole acronym in the book and a framework that's called SPARK, which I'm happy to go through, but I'll just end up talking straight for half an hour if I go down that route. But I'd start with that, try to identify past memories of fun, look for themes and then prioritize those people and activities and settings.
我也在书里创照了期刊摘选 和一个框架,称为【火花】 我很开心继续述说, 但如果继续下去,恐怕 我要半个小时结束这个话题了 但我还是会以此开头, 尝试分辨过去快乐的回忆 探出主题和优先分列 那些人,事物和活动
DB: Well, let's talk about SPARK a little bit, because in looking through the chat, I mean, that's why we ask for the moments of delight. It's a moment for people to reflect and think about something that was probably pretty fun. If it delighted you, it was probably pretty fun. So tell us a little bit more about the importance of noticing and this whole SPARK method.
DB:好的, 那我们说说一点关于【火花】 因为通过整个谈话, 我指,为什么我们会询问惬意的回忆 这是一个让人们反映的回忆 及思考什么为真正的快乐 如果它使你满足惬意, 那便是真正快乐 所以请告诉我们多一些重要的需知 和这整个【火花】的方法
CP: So the first step in SPARK, the S, actually stands for "make space" because we do need to clear out some space for fun. If you're feeling constantly overwhelmed, you're probably going to feel like you can't even begin this process. What I recommend that people start with in terms of clearing space is to begin with the biggest source of distraction for most of us these days, which is our phones and our digital devices. Before the pandemic, the average person in America was spending upwards of four hours a day just on their phones. So not their tablets, not their computers, not their TVs, just their phones, which is a quarter of your waking life, and it adds up to 60 full days a year. When you think about it that way, sure, some of that time is useful and productive and perhaps essential, but there's also a lot of it that's just a kind of, frittering away of time, the fake fun that we're talking about. And if you're able to create better boundaries with your devices and more of what I call screen-life balance, you're going to end up with more free time that you then can devote towards pursuing fun. So another way to create space is actually to think about your commitments and see which ones you could say no to. Like, for example, I used to volunteer in my daughter's preschool board and then at some point I'm like, the school's fine, I'm not adding to it, and I'm not enjoying the meetings and so I quit and it cleared up a lot of space. Also, giving yourself a permission slip is huge in terms of making space. A lot of people think that they don't deserve fun, that there are too many other priorities, they're taking care of other people, their needs are at the bottom of the list. I've actually had people say that they have written out an actual permission slip for themselves and signed it. So if that's your deal, do it. I think it's actually really important whether it's a literal permission slip or a mental one.
CP:第一步,【火花】里的S 其实是指创建空间 因为我们需要清出一些空间给快乐 但你持续的感到挫折 你可能会觉得你根本无法开始这个过程 我建议的是清理空间这词 是用以干扰我们开始最大的来源 对于此刻大多数的我们 便是我们的手机和电子产品 在疫情前 美国平均每个人都会花费 一天内长达四小时在手机上 不是平板电脑, 电脑,电视,便是手机 四分之一起床后的生活 加起来在一年里长达六十天 当你这么想时,当然, 一些时间是有意义和有效率 的或属于不可或缺, 但那也有一大部分的时间消耗掉了 这就是我们所说的虚假快乐 如果你能对电子器械有很好的界限 更多的,我称之屏幕-生活的平衡 你会拥有更多的空闲时间 使你可以更加的投入于追寻快乐 另一个创建空间的办法是 思考你的职责 及哪个可以被你否决 比如,举个例子,我是 女儿幼稚园理事会的自愿者 有些时候我就像 学校的优势,我无法增加 我也不喜欢会议,所以我退出了 这清出了很多的空间 再来,给予你自己一个 创建空间的许可证 很多人觉得自己不值得拥有快乐 他们有太多的顾虑 他们顾虑着他人 自己的需求排在了列表的底层 我曾听闻别人说 他们把给予自己的许可证写出来了 签上了名 如果那是你的协议,那便去做吧 我觉得拥有一个字面上 的许可证很重要 亦或者心理上
Then the P is to pursue passions and hobbies and interests. The more interests you have and the more skills and knowledge you have, the more interesting your life will be, first of all, but also the more portals into playful connected flow you'll find. And the thing that sparked that idea for me was the book "Flow" by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi who was the psychologist who coined the term flow. And in his book he made this comment that really stood out to me, which was that to someone who doesn't play chess, a chess board is just a board with some carved figurines. Honestly, that's what it still is to me. But if you know how to play chess, if you put in the work to learn to play chess, it becomes a portal into flow. And I would argue, into fun. But the idea is just get out there, try something new, do something new, get up off your couch, you know. It might take a bit to get over your inertia at first, but it is worth it. So that's the P, is to pursue passions.
接下来P指追寻热爱和爱好及兴趣 你所拥有的兴趣越多, 所拥有的技巧和知识便越多 你的人生便会更加有趣,第一, 你会找寻到越多 连接心流玩笑的传送门 这触发了我一个主意 是一本书, 奇克森特米哈伊米哈伊 的“心流理论” 心理学家创造了心流一词 他在书里的评价点醒了我 对于不下棋的人 棋盘只是一个有着雕刻图形的板 说实话,我依然这么觉得 但是如果你懂得如何下棋 如果你对下棋付出了努力 这将会变成心流的传送门 我想表明,这就是快乐 但这只是呼之欲出的主意 尝试某个新的事物,去实行它 离开你的沙发,你懂的 你需要先克服你的惯性,但这值得 所起,P指向了追寻热爱
The A of spark is for attract fun because you probably have noticed there are certain people in your life who just seem to have more fun than you and you might not know why -- you have fun, too, David. This guy, just look at him having lots of fun. But when I asked people in my research, I straight up asked them, “Describe someone in your life whom you consider a ‘fun person,’ and then tell me like, what about them makes them fun?" And even I thought that I’d get a lot of really stereotypical responses: "they're extroverts" or "they're the lives of the party" or "they're the class clowns." There were some of those. But it was so interesting because a lot of people said things like, “They make everyone feel very comfortable in their presence.” Or “They laugh very easily at other people’s jokes or stories.” Or “They go along with things, they go with the flow.” And it really stood out to me because the traits they were describing were not necessarily associated with extroversion. So you can be an introvert and make someone feel comfortable. I think in some cases introverts are better at tuning into that. And also a lot of them were trainable. You can get better at those skills. So I got really interested in the idea of how do we become people who attract more fun, and I think what I just described are three ways to do so.
【火花】里的A指吸引快乐 因为你会注意到在你生活里的某些人 比你拥有更多的快乐 大卫,你可能也不知道为什么 这家伙,看着他,便觉得他很快乐 但当我在探讨里询问时, 我直接的询问他们 “请形容某位你认为快乐的人,” 及接下来告诉我, 什么导致他们快乐?” 即使我得到很多类型化的反应 “他们很外向” 或者“他们生来为了派对” 或“他们是班里的小丑” 总有这些回应 但有趣的是多数人会说,比如, “他们的出现使人感到舒适” 或者“他们很容易因为别人 的玩笑或故事而大笑” 或者“他们遵循着自己的心流” 这使我领悟他们所形容的品质里 并不完全与外向性有关联 你也可以是位内向者及让人感到舒适 有些时候,内向者会更于合适 及大多数他们是可被训练的 你可以更加完善的掌握这些技巧 所以我真的对这个主意很感兴趣 关于如何成为吸引快乐的人 我可以用三个方式来概括
Another is to switch yourself into what I think of as a fun mindset, which is a fun-oriented twist on Carol Dweck's growth mindset. And the idea there is that our default mode, our brain's default mode, is naturally going to be to focus on things that cause us anxiety and fear for the simple reason that that's evolutionarily how we avoid threats. You want to be scanning the horizon for threats, otherwise you could get killed or eaten or something. So it actually takes work to switch yourself to focus on the positive. And I think that the more you do so, the more likely you are to notice the moments of playful connected flow and to create more opportunities for it. So if you can start to begin to deliberately pay more attention to the delight in the world, instead of going with the natural tendency to focus on sources of anxiety and fear, it really will get you into a mindset that's much more conducive.
另外便是改变自己 去拥有一个快乐的思维 就像卡罗德威客以快乐为 目标缠绕于成长中 主意便是对于我们的默认模式 我们大脑里的默认模式 会自然的关注于使 我们焦虑和恐惧的事物 简单的原由便是我们演变中 面对威胁的自然反应 你想审视这些威胁的地平线 否者你便会被杀害或被吃 所以你只需要转换自己去专注正面的 我觉得你越经常这么做 你会更多的注意到玩笑连接着心流 及创造更多机会 如果你可以不慌不忙 的开始给与更多的注意力 对于这个世界的惬意 对比被自然趋导于专注 焦虑和恐惧的来源 会使你拥有有益的思维
The R in SPARK may be my favorite. It is for rebel.
【火花】里的R是我的最爱 它指叛逆
DB: Yes! Yes!
DB:对!对!
CP: (Laughs) Not like "get yourself in jail" rebellion, to clarify. But when I was reading through people's anecdotes, there was this repeated theme of playful deviance is what I'll call it, of breaking the rules, just like, a little bit, you know. I mean skinny dipping would be an example of that. But even someone who said that they had snuck into a pool, you know, at night, I think fully clothed, with like, a laundry basket and some pool noodles. I don’t know, and like, they’d had a great time. Or really anything, like if you normally listen to educational podcasts, maybe you can drive around in your car and turn off the podcast and the news and just like blast the song you loved when you were 17 and sing along. You know, or just take a little break from your workday to do something that will bring you a sense of delight. So rebellion.
CP:(笑声) 去阐述,这不是 让你造反“使自己坐牢” 但是当我阅读人们的趣事 都在重复我所说的 玩笑异常行为这个话题 去破坏规则,比如, 一点点的,你知道的 我指裸泳是个例子 但即使某人说他曾经在泳池里潜行,你知道的 在夜里,我觉得是完整着衣 比如,一个衣物的篮子和一些面条 我不知道,比如说,他们有个愉快的时间 或是真的某些事情 比如你在听关于教育的播客 或者你在自己车上驾驶中关了播客和新闻 歌曲轰炸着你17岁时最爱的歌和一路唱随 你知道的,在工作日里的一点休息 去做某些让你惬意的事情 所以叛逆
And if you can't think of a way to do that, I think it's also kind of fun to think about ways to do something delightful for somebody else, a way to do something that's going to surprise them. So maybe this is a little bit separate, but I find that that can be a way if you're still thinking, I can't think of something to do in my own life, do something to delight someone else.
如果你无法想到这么做 我觉得去做某些惬意的事情也是种快乐 对于某些人 去做些让他们惊喜的事 或许这有些分岔 但这或许是个办法,如果你还在思考着 我想不到生活里可以做什么 来满足某些人
And then lastly, the K of SPARK is keep at it, which basically means that fun is much like exercise, like, you're not going to do it once and then that's it, you're done. You actually have to keep prioritizing it because life is going to keep throwing like, not fun things your way. And unless you're working to keep that as a priority, it's not going to be a priority. And the way that I personally think about approaching that is in terms of what I call microdoses and then booster shots. So if you know that there's something small, a little microdose that you could work into your schedule regularly that you enjoy, that might lead to playful connected flow, like a regular coffee date or a walk with a friend who you've realized is a fun magnet for you. Or in my case, like, my weekly guitar class is definitely regular microdoses. Build that into your schedule, carve out the time for it. And then a booster shot would be something that takes more time, more energy, maybe more money. Although again, fun doesn't necessarily require money. But, you know, if you know that every time you get together with this particular group of friends, it's just outrageously fun, then, like, actually go to the work of organizing and figuring out how to get childcare and whatever so you can spend time with them. And I think that if you can sprinkle these microdoses and booster shots into your life regularly, you will build the framework for a life that is conducive to fun.
最后,【火花】里的K指保留 根本上指快乐像是练习 比如,你不会只做一次 及你完成了,便如此了 你需要保持它的优先化 因为生活总会向你抛些, 比如,阻碍你快乐的东西 除非你努力地保持着快乐的优先权 否则它不会是首选 于我个人的想法,想接近需要 我所说的微剂量及接着增强剂 如果你知道某样小的事物 一点微剂量便可以使其成为常态 如果你享受, 那便会促成玩笑连接心流 像是平时的咖啡约会或是和朋友散步 你觉得是快乐磁铁的某人 或在我的例子中,我每周的吉他课 不可否认是平时的微剂量 放进你的时间表里,分些时间给它 接着增强剂便是 某些需要大量时间的事物 更多的能力,或者 更多的金钱 再次强调,快乐不一定 需要很多金钱 但是,你知道的,当你每次与 特定的小组或朋友在一起时 会带来惊人的快乐 接着,比如,一起去组织 和找寻如何看护儿童和其他的 可以和他们一起花时间的事物 我觉得如果你可以使这些微剂量闪烁 及增强剂注入平时的生活里 你会筑起一个追寻快乐的框架
DB: So one of the things that I found fun in your book is that you called for a fun audit.
DB:我在你书里发现一个快乐的事物 是你所说的快乐审计
CP: You thought that sounded fun, David, I think that sounds incredibly unfun.
CP:大卫,你觉得快乐的想法 在我看来一点都不快乐
DB: Well, I'm saying it sounds like an oxymoron, right? But actually, a fun audit can be a good thing to do if you're feeling stuck. So tell us about a fun audit.
DB:嗯,我更像是指矛盾修辞,对吗? 但其实, 但当你困惑时, 快乐审计是件很好的事情 所以告诉我们一些关于快乐审计
CP: The fun audit involves looking, reviewing your own life and just noticing how much fun you are or are not having, scanning through your leisure activities and identifying those sources of fake fun that we're talking about so that you can begin to reduce or eliminate them. And then very importantly, figuring out some activities or something to do to replace the time that you were spending on the time-sucking fake fun.
CP:快乐审计包括找寻, 审核你自己的人生及观察 你有多少的快乐 或完全没有 审视自己的休闲活动 及分辨我们所说的虚假快乐的来源 所以你可以开始减少和消除它们 重要的是 找出某些活动或是一些要做的事情 去替代那些花在虚假快乐的时间上
DB: But, you know, it is a struggle for some folks. And Kat wants to know how we can create fun while grappling with things like climate change or nuclear war or all the other, you know, frankly, existential threats that are out there in the world.
DB:但是,你知道的, 这对人们是件很困难的事 凯特想知道我们如何 在应对气候变化、 核战争或其他所有问题时创造乐趣, 坦率地说,你知道, 世界上存在的生存威胁。
CP: I think it's really important. I think a lot of people feel that way and that we do get consumed. And the media landscape is designed to make us feel that way. That's another thing to acknowledge, is that not only are our brains naturally primed to notice those things, but you know, there's an expression in journalism: if it bleeds, it leads. Like, you never open up your favorite newspaper and see an article about how there's a real explosion in puppies, like, that doesn't happen. So I think also being more judicious about what you allow into your brain because, I mean, any time you pick up your phone, I think of it as a Pandora's box of emotions. It's going to result in an emotion. What emotion is that going to be, and do you want that in your brain? If you check the news, it’s going to have an impact on your mental state. If you check your email, if you check social media. I'm not saying I know what that reaction is going to be for you, but there is going to be one.
CP:我觉得这真的很重要 我觉得大多数人会觉得 我们需要接受消化这些 及媒体封面便是设计 引导我们这么觉得 另外一个需知的是 并不是我们的大脑自主地 去注意这些事情 但你知道,这是一种表达 在新闻里:从鲜血中吸取教训 比如,你永远不会打开喜欢的报章 去看一个小狗的真实曝光 比如,这不会发生, 所以我觉得更明确的 是你允许什么进入你的大脑 因为,我指,任何时间你拿起了手机, 它就像潘多拉盒子里的情绪 会导致了某种情绪 至于是什么情绪, 和你在大脑里做了什么 当你查阅了新闻 你的心理会留下影响 当你查阅了邮件, 查阅了社交媒体, 我不是想说会给你带来了什么反应 但总会有
So as an example, I used to have the news app on my phone, and I would find myself reading the same articles again and again, hoping something would have changed, which it didn't. Then I realized, I'm not going to have the news app on my phone. Think about notifications as interruptions because that's really what they're doing. And then I would suggest asking yourself what you want to be interrupted for. Because notifications are there for the benefit of the people making the app that sent you the notification, it's not for you. And I think that many of us feel very, very trapped in this feeling that the world is dark and horrible and that we're powerless. And that's a horrible place to be. And I think it takes a lot of work to bring yourself out of that. But it's worth it. And it actually is good for trying to address some of those things.
举个例子 我在手机上打开新闻软件 我会自寻重复阅读一些文章 期望着某些事情的转变 如果没有 我会发现我不希望手机上有新闻软件 会觉得通知是种打扰 因为它们在真实运行 我便会建议我自己询问 自己想被什么打扰 因为通知在那 制作软件在于有益于人 给你发的通知,并不是给你的 我会觉得多数的我们被困住了,非常的, 觉得这个世界是黑暗和恐怖的 觉得我们的力量很弱小 觉得这是个恐怖的地方 我觉得这需要很多 的努力才能将你带出 但它值得 尝试解决也是个很好的办法
DB: I think fun is probably best shared, as you noted earlier. Any tips on how to share fun with the folks in our lives? I think Jim wanted to know that.
DB:我觉得快乐是最好的分享, 如果你有早些注意到 有任何关于分享快乐 给人们的技巧吗? 我觉得Jim会想知道
CP: Well, I think picking the right people is important. There’s certain people that really are not conducive to fun, and hopefully you can help them to change, right? But as a first step, if you have the choice between hanging out with someone who consistently makes you feel comfortable and you enjoyed being in the presence of and generates fun, versus someone who's a wet blanket, pick that one, right? Again, I talked about doing things together. I think that things like cooking a meal together or trying something new together or seeing if your friends want to go to a class together or, you know, all those things are very conducive to opening people up in a way that helps people have fun. I think also trying to find people who are already having fun and joining that group.
CP:好的,我觉得 选择对的人很重要 有部分人真的很不益于快乐 及希望你能改变对方,对吗? 但是第一步, 如果你决定和某人出去 谁持续的让你感到舒适 和他的出现让你感到愉悦 及产出快乐 相比扫兴的人 选哪个,知道了吧? 再来,我想说一起处事 我觉得一起下厨 或一起尝试新的事物 或是和你朋友一起去班级,你知道的 这些都有利于打开心扉 帮助人们感到开心 我也觉得去寻找已经拥有快乐的人们 和参与他们
DB: I want to thank all the members for coming. I also want to apologize for not getting to all of your questions, but the time just kind of flew by because, you know, we were having fun. So thank you. Thank you very much for joining us today, and go have some fun.
DB:我想感谢所有参与的会员 我也感到抱歉,没有抽取到你的问题 随着时间的流失。你知道的, 我们之间非常愉快 谢谢 非常感谢你今日的参与 去找些快乐吧
CP: Thanks, David, you too.
CP:谢谢大卫,你也是
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