(Music) This is the human test, a test to see if you are a human. Please raise your hand if something applies to you. Are we agreed? Yes? Then let's begin.
(glasba) To je preizkus človeškosti, preizkus, če ste človek. Prosim, dvignite roko, če nekaj velja za vas. Smo dogovorjeni? Ja? Potem začnimo.
Have you ever eaten a booger long past your childhood? (Laughter) It's okay, it's safe here.
Ste že kdaj pojedli smrkelj precej po izteku vašega otroštva? (smeh) V redu je, tu je varno.
Have you ever made a small, weird sound when you remembered something embarrassing?
Ste že kdaj naredili majhen, čuden zvok, ko ste se spomnili česa sramotnega?
Have you ever purposely lowercased the first letter of a text in order to come across as sad or disappointed? (Laughter) Okay.
Ste že kdaj namenoma začeli z majhno začetnico, da bi se zdeli žalostni ali razočarani? (smeh) V redu.
Have you ever ended a text with a period as a sign of aggression? Okay. Period.
Ste že kdaj končali besedilo s piko kot znakom nasilja? V redu. Pika.
Have you ever laughed or smiled when someone said something shitty to you and then spent the rest of the day wondering why you reacted that way? Yes.
Ste se že kdaj smejali ali nasmehnili, ko vam je nekdo povedal kakšno sranje in se potem preostanek dneva spraševali, zakaj ste se tako odzvali? Ja.
Have you ever seemed to lose your airplane ticket a thousand times as you walked from the check-in to the gate? Yes.
Se vam je že kdaj zdelo, da ste tisočkrat izgubili letalsko karto, ko ste šli od prijave pri pultu do izhoda za let? Ja.
Have you ever put on a pair of pants and then much later realized that there was a loose sock smushed up against your thigh? (Laughter) Good.
Ste si že kdaj oblekli hlače in potem mnogo kasneje ugotovili, da imate ob stegno stisnjeno nogavico? (smeh) Dobro.
Have you ever tried to guess someone else's password so many times that it locked their account? Mmm.
Ste že kdaj poskušali uganiti geslo nekoga drugega tolikokrat, da ste jim zaklenili račun? Mmm.
Have you ever had a nagging feeling that one day you will be discovered as a fraud? Yes, it's safe here.
Ste že kdaj imeli moteč občutek, da vas bodo nekega dne razkrili kot prevaranta? Ja, tukaj je varno.
Have you ever hoped that there was some ability you hadn't discovered yet that you were just naturally great at? Mmm.
Ste že kdaj upali, da obstaja sposobnost, ki je še niste odkrili, a ste v njej po naravi odlični? Mmm. Ste že kdaj v resničnem življenju kaj zlomili
Have you ever broken something in real life, and then found yourself looking for an "undo" button in real life?
in se potem znašli v iskanju gumba "Prekliči" v resničnem življenju? Ste že kdaj založili svojo TED akreditacijo
Have you ever misplaced your TED badge and then immediately started imagining what a three-day Vancouver vacation might look like?
in si takoj zatem pričeli zamišljati, kako bi izgledal tridnevni dopust v Vancouvru?
Have you ever marveled at how someone you thought was so ordinary could suddenly become so beautiful?
Ste se že kdaj čudili, kako je nekdo, za katerega ste mislili, da je povsem običajen, lahko naenkrat postal tako lep?
Have you ever stared at your phone smiling like an idiot while texting with someone? Have you ever subsequently texted that person the phrase "I'm staring at the phone smiling like an idiot"?
Ste že kdaj strmeli v svoj telefon smejoč se kot idiot, medtem ko ste si z nekom izmenjevali sporočila? Ste že kdaj takoj zatem tej osebi poslali sporočilo: "Strmim v svoj telefon smejoč se kot idiot"?
Have you ever been tempted to, and then gave in to the temptation, of looking through someone else's phone?
Ste že kdaj bili v skušnjavi, in se potem tej skušnjavi vdali, da brskate po telefonu nekoga drugega?
Have you ever had a conversation with yourself and then suddenly realized you're a real asshole to yourself?
Ste se že kdaj pogovarjali sami s seboj in naenkrat spoznali, da ste pravi kreten do sebe? (smeh)
(Laughter)
Se vam je že kdaj spraznila baterija
Has your phone ever run out of battery in the middle of an argument, and it sort of felt like the phone was breaking up with both of you?
sredi prepira in ste se pri tem počutili, kot da bi telefon prekinil z vama obema?
Have you ever thought that working on an issue between you was futile because it should just be easier than this, or this is supposed to happen just naturally? Have you ever realized that very little, in the long run, just happens naturally?
Ste že kdaj mislili, da je delo na vajinih težavah jalovo, ker bi preprosto moralo biti lažje kot to, ali da bi se to moralo zgoditi kar samo po sebi? Ste že kdaj spoznali, da se na dolgi rok zelo malo stvari zgodi kar samo po sebi?
Have you ever woken up blissfully and suddenly been flooded by the awful remembrance that someone had left you?
Ste se že kdaj prebudili blaženi in bili naenkrat preplavljeni z groznimi spomini, da vas je nekdo zapustil?
Have you ever lost the ability to imagine a future without a person that no longer was in your life? Have you ever looked back on that event with the sad smile of autumn and the realization that futures will happen regardless?
Ste že kdaj izgubili sposobnost, da si predstavljate prihodnost brez osebe, ki je ni bilo več v vašem življenju? Ste že kdaj pogledali nazaj na ta dogodek z žalostnim jesenskim nasmehom in s spoznanjem, da se bodo prihodnosti zgodile, ne glede na to? Čestitke.
Congratulations. You have now completed the test. You are all human.
Prestali ste preizkus. Vsi ste ljudje. (aplavz)
(Applause)