(Music) This is the human test, a test to see if you are a human. Please raise your hand if something applies to you. Are we agreed? Yes? Then let's begin.
(Mūzika) Šis ir cilvēku tests. Tests, lai pārbaudītu, vai esat cilvēks. Lūdzu, paceliet roku, ja kaut kas no minētā attiecas uz jums! Esam sarunājuši? Ja? Tad sākam!
Have you ever eaten a booger long past your childhood? (Laughter) It's okay, it's safe here.
Vai esat kādreiz ēduši puņķus, jau pieaugušā vecumā? (Smiekli) Viss kārtībā, šeit ir droši.
Have you ever made a small, weird sound when you remembered something embarrassing?
Vai esat kādreiz izdvesuši klusu, dīvainu skaņu, atceroties kādu neērtu situāciju? (Nopūta)
Have you ever purposely lowercased the first letter of a text in order to come across as sad or disappointed? (Laughter) Okay.
Vai esat kādreiz tīši sākuši rakstīt īsziņu ar mazo burtu, lai radītu iespaidu, ka esat noskumuši vai vīlušies? (Smiekli) Labi.
Have you ever ended a text with a period as a sign of aggression? Okay. Period.
Vai esat kādreiz īsziņas beigās rakstījuši „Punkts.”, lai parādītu, ka esat agresīvi noskaņoti? Labi. Punkts.
Have you ever laughed or smiled when someone said something shitty to you and then spent the rest of the day wondering why you reacted that way? Yes.
Vai esat kādreiz smējušies vai smaidījuši, kad kāds jums saka ko riebīgu, un tad pavadījuši atlikušo dienas daļu, prātojot, kāpēc tā reaģējāt? Jā.
Have you ever seemed to lose your airplane ticket a thousand times as you walked from the check-in to the gate? Yes.
Vai jums kādreiz ir šķitis, ka jūsu lidmašīnas biļete pazūd vai tūkstošiem reižu, kamēr nokļūstat no reģistrācijas līdz izejai uz lidmašīnu? Jā.
Have you ever put on a pair of pants and then much later realized that there was a loose sock smushed up against your thigh? (Laughter) Good.
Vai esat kādreiz uzvilkuši bikses un tad vēlāk pamanījuši, ka tās starā pie augšstilba ir iemīcīta nomaldījusies zeķe? (Smiekli) Labi.
Have you ever tried to guess someone else's password so many times that it locked their account? Mmm.
Vai esat kādreiz mēģinājuši uzminēt kāda cilvēka paroli tik daudz reižu, ka viņa kontu tādēļ nobloķē? Mmm.
Have you ever had a nagging feeling that one day you will be discovered as a fraud? Yes, it's safe here.
Vai jums kādreiz ir bijusi tā smeldzīgā sajūta, ka kādu dienu cilvēki atklās, ka esat krāpies? Jā, šeit ir droši.
Have you ever hoped that there was some ability you hadn't discovered yet that you were just naturally great at? Mmm.
Vai esat kādreiz cerējuši, ka ir kāda spēja, ko vēl neesat atklājuši, bet kurā jums ir dabas dots talants? Mmm.
Have you ever broken something in real life, and then found yourself looking for an "undo" button in real life?
Vai esat kādreiz ko saplēsuši — realitātē — un tad attapušies meklējam „Atsaukt” pogu — realitātē?
Have you ever misplaced your TED badge and then immediately started imagining what a three-day Vancouver vacation might look like?
Vai esat kādreiz pazaudējuši savu TED vārda karti un tūlīt pat sākuši iztēloties, kāds varētu izvērsties trīs dienu atvaļinājums Vankūverā?
Have you ever marveled at how someone you thought was so ordinary could suddenly become so beautiful?
Vai esat kādreiz brīnījušies, kā kāds, kuru uzskatījāt par pavisam parastu, pēkšņi varēja kļūt tik skaists?
Have you ever stared at your phone smiling like an idiot while texting with someone? Have you ever subsequently texted that person the phrase "I'm staring at the phone smiling like an idiot"?
Vai esat kādreiz blenzuši telefonā un muļķīgi smaidījuši, ar kādu sarakstoties? Vai esat kādreiz šim cilvēkam pēc tam rakstījuši šos vārdus: „Es blenžu telefonā un muļķīgi smaidu”?
Have you ever been tempted to, and then gave in to the temptation, of looking through someone else's phone?
Vai jums kādreiz ir bijis kārdinājums un tad esat krituši kārdinājumā ieskatīties cita cilvēka telefonā?
Have you ever had a conversation with yourself and then suddenly realized you're a real asshole to yourself?
Vai esat kādreiz sarunājušies ar sevi un tad pēkšņi atskārtuši, ka izturaties pret sevi kā īsts kretīns?
(Laughter)
(Smiekli)
Has your phone ever run out of battery in the middle of an argument, and it sort of felt like the phone was breaking up with both of you?
Vai jūsu telefonam kādreiz ir beigusies baterija strīda karstumā, un jums ir šķitis, ka telefons grib pamest jūs abus?
Have you ever thought that working on an issue between you was futile because it should just be easier than this, or this is supposed to happen just naturally? Have you ever realized that very little, in the long run, just happens naturally?
Vai jums kādreiz ir šķitis, ka kāda jautājuma risināšana starp jums abiem ir bezjēdzīga, jo tam būtu jābūt vieglāk vai tam vienkārši būtu jānotiek dabiski? Vai jums kādreiz ir ienācis prātā, ka ilgtermiņā reti kas notiek dabiski?
Have you ever woken up blissfully and suddenly been flooded by the awful remembrance that someone had left you?
Vai esat kādreiz pamodušies pilnīgā svētlaimē un tad pēkšņi sabrukuši, atceroties, ka kāds jūs ir pametis?
Have you ever lost the ability to imagine a future without a person that no longer was in your life? Have you ever looked back on that event with the sad smile of autumn and the realization that futures will happen regardless?
Vai esat kādreiz zaudējuši spēju iztēloties nākotni bez cilvēka, kura jūsu dzīvē vairāk nav? Vai esat kādreiz atskatījušies uz šo gadījumu ar rudenīgi skumju smaidu un apjausmu, ka nākotnes būs tik un tā?
Congratulations. You have now completed the test. You are all human.
Apsveicu! Jūs esat pabeiguši testu. Jūs visi esat cilvēki.
(Applause)
(Aplausi)