(Música) Això és la prova humana, una prova per veure si sou humans. Alceu la mà si alguna d'aquestes coses us concerneix, si us plau. D'acord? Sí? Comencem doncs.
(Music) This is the human test, a test to see if you are a human. Please raise your hand if something applies to you. Are we agreed? Yes? Then let's begin.
Us heu menjat mai un moc ja d'adults? (Rialles) No passa res, aquí ho podeu dir.
Have you ever eaten a booger long past your childhood? (Laughter) It's okay, it's safe here.
Heu fet mai un sorollet estrany quan heu recordat alguna cosa vergonyosa?
Have you ever made a small, weird sound when you remembered something embarrassing?
Heu escrit conscienment una minúscula a l'inici d'un text per expressar la vostra tristesa o decepció? (Rialles) Molt bé.
Have you ever purposely lowercased the first letter of a text in order to come across as sad or disappointed? (Laughter) Okay.
Heu acabat mai un text amb un punt com a mostra d'agressivitat? Molt bé. Punt.
Have you ever ended a text with a period as a sign of aggression? Okay. Period.
Heu rigut o somrigut quan algú us ha dit alguna cosa estúpida i us heu passat la resta del dia intentant saber per què heu reaccionat així? Sí.
Have you ever laughed or smiled when someone said something shitty to you and then spent the rest of the day wondering why you reacted that way? Yes.
Heu tingut la sensació que perdieu el bitllet d'avió una i altra vegada mentre anaveu de facturació fins a l'embarcament? Sí.
Have you ever seemed to lose your airplane ticket a thousand times as you walked from the check-in to the gate? Yes.
Us heu posat uns pantalons i més tard us heu adonat que hi havia un mitjó desaparellat aixafat contra la cuixa? (Rialles) Bé.
Have you ever put on a pair of pants and then much later realized that there was a loose sock smushed up against your thigh? (Laughter) Good.
Heu intentat endevinar la contrasenya d'algú tantes vegades que li heu bloquejat el compte? Mmm.
Have you ever tried to guess someone else's password so many times that it locked their account? Mmm.
Heu patit aquella incòmoda sensació que un dia la gent s'adonarà de que sou una enganyifa? Tranquils, aquí és segur.
Have you ever had a nagging feeling that one day you will be discovered as a fraud? Yes, it's safe here.
Heu tingut l'esperança que hi hagi una habilitat que encara no sabeu i en la que sou els números u? Mmm.
Have you ever hoped that there was some ability you hadn't discovered yet that you were just naturally great at? Mmm.
Heu trencat mai res a la vida real i us heu descobert buscant el botó de "desfer"?
Have you ever broken something in real life, and then found yourself looking for an "undo" button in real life?
Heu perdut l'acreditació de TED i immediatament us heu posat a pensar com serien unes vacances de tres dies a Vancouver?
Have you ever misplaced your TED badge and then immediately started imagining what a three-day Vancouver vacation might look like?
No us heu quedat parats quan algú que creieu tan ordinari ha resultat ser increïble?
Have you ever marveled at how someone you thought was so ordinary could suddenly become so beautiful?
Us heu quedat mai mirant el mòbil, somrient com idiotes mentre enviàveu missatges a algú? I, a l'instant, li heu enviat un missatge a aquella persona amb la frase "m'estic mirant el mòbil somrient com un idiota"?
Have you ever stared at your phone smiling like an idiot while texting with someone? Have you ever subsequently texted that person the phrase "I'm staring at the phone smiling like an idiot"?
Heu tingut mai la temptació, i llavors hi heu acabat caient, de tafanejar el telèfon mòbil d'algú altre?
Have you ever been tempted to, and then gave in to the temptation, of looking through someone else's phone?
Heu tingut mai una conversa amb vosaltres mateixos i us heu adonat, de cop i volta, que us estàveu tractant d'idiotes?
Have you ever had a conversation with yourself and then suddenly realized you're a real asshole to yourself?
(Rialles)
(Laughter)
Us heu quedat mai sense bateria al telèfon quan estàveu discutint amb algú i heu tingut la sensació de que el mòbil no en volia saber res de cap dels dos?
Has your phone ever run out of battery in the middle of an argument, and it sort of felt like the phone was breaking up with both of you?
Heu pensat mai que intentar solucionar un problema entre tots dos era inútil perquè tot hauria de ser més fàcil, o perquè és una cosa que hauria de passar de manera natural? Heu descobert que hi ha molt poca cosa que, a la llarga, passi de manera natural?
Have you ever thought that working on an issue between you was futile because it should just be easier than this, or this is supposed to happen just naturally? Have you ever realized that very little, in the long run, just happens naturally?
Us heu despertat mai contents i, de cop i volta, us ha aclaparat el record d'aquell algú que us ha deixat?
Have you ever woken up blissfully and suddenly been flooded by the awful remembrance that someone had left you?
Heu perdut l'habilitat d'imaginar-vos un futur sense aquella persona que ja no és a les vostres vides? Heu mirat enrere a aquell moment amb el somriure trist de l'ocàs i la certesa que el futur no té marxa enrere?
Have you ever lost the ability to imagine a future without a person that no longer was in your life? Have you ever looked back on that event with the sad smile of autumn and the realization that futures will happen regardless?
Felicitats. Heu acabat la prova. Tots sou humans.
Congratulations. You have now completed the test. You are all human.
(Aplaudiments)
(Applause)