Way before the first selfie, the ancient Greeks and Romans had a myth about someone a little too obsessed with his own image. In one telling, Narcissus was a handsome guy wandering the world in search of someone to love. After rejecting a nymph named Echo, he caught a glimpse of his own reflection in a river, and fell in love with it. Unable to tear himself away, Narcissus drowned. A flower marked the spot of where he died, and we call that flower the Narcissus.
Mnogo pre prvog selfija, antički Grci i Rimljani su imali mit o nekome ko je malčice isuviše opsednut sopstvenim likom. U jednoj od priča, Narcis je zgodan momak koji luta svetom, tragajući za nekim koga bi voleo. Nakon što je odbio nimfu po imenu Eho, uhvatio je na tren sopstveni odraz u reci i zaljubio se u njega. Nemogavši da se odvoji od njega, Narcis se udavio. Cvet je izrastao na mestu na kom je umro, a taj cvet zovemo narcisom.
The myth captures the basic idea of narcissism, elevated and sometimes detrimental self-involvement. But it's not just a personality type that shows up in advice columns. It's actually a set of traits classified and studied by psychologists. The psychological definition of narcissism is an inflated, grandiose self-image. To varying degrees, narcissists think they're better looking, smarter, and more important than other people, and that they deserve special treatment. Psychologists recognize two forms of narcissism as a personality trait: grandiose and vulnerable narcissism. There's also narcissistic personality disorder, a more extreme form, which we'll return to shortly.
Mit opisuje osnovnu ideju narcisoidnosti, uzvišenu i ponekad štetnu zaljubljenost u sebe. Međutim, ne radi se samo o tipu ličnosti koji se pojavljuje u rubrikama za savete. Radi se zapravu o skupu osobina koje su psiholozi klasifikovali i izučavali. Psihološka definicija narcisoidnosti je da je to preuveličana, grandiozna slika o sebi. Do određenog stepena, narcisi smatraju da bolje izgledaju, da su pametniji i važniji od drugih ljudi i da zaslužuju poseban tretman. Psiholozi prepoznaju dva vida narcisoidnosti kao crte ličnosti: grandioznu i ranjivu narcisoidnost. Takođe postoji narcisoidni poremećaj ličnosti,
Grandiose narcissism is the most familiar kind, characterized by extroversion, dominance, and attention seeking. Grandiose narcissists pursue attention and power, sometimes as politicians, celebrities, or cultural leaders. Of course, not everyone who pursues these positions of power is narcissistic. Many do it for very positive reasons, like reaching their full potential, or helping make people's lives better. But narcissistic individuals seek power for the status and attention that goes with it.
ekstremniji oblik kome ćemo se vratiti nešto kasnije. Grandiozna narcisoidnost je najpoznatiji vid iste, karakterišu je ekstravertnost, dominacija i potreba za pažnjom. Grandiozni narcis traga za pažnjom i moći, ponekad kao političar, poznata ličnost ili kulturološki vođa. Naravno, nisu svi koji teže ovim pozicijama moći narcisi. Mnogi to rade iz pozitivnih razloga, poput ostvarivanja punog potencijala ili unapređivanja ljudskih života. Ali narcisoidni pojedinci žele moć zbog statusa i pažnje koja ide uz nju.
Meanwhile, vulnerable narcissists can be quiet and reserved. They have a strong sense of entitlement, but are easily threatened or slighted.
U međuvremenu, ranjivi narcisi mogu da budu tihi i uzdržani. Imaju snažan osećaj toga šta im pripada, ali ih je lako uplašiti ili omalovažiti.
In either case, the dark side of narcissism shows up over the long term. Narcissists tend to act selfishly, so narcissistic leaders may make risky or unethical decisions, and narcissistic partners may be dishonest or unfaithful. When their rosy view of themselves is challenged, they can become resentful and aggressive. It's like a disease where the sufferers feel pretty good, but the people around them suffer.
U svakom slučaju, mračna strana narcisoidnosti se pokaže na duže staze. Narcisi se obično ponašaju sebično, pa narcisoidne vođe mogu da prave rizične ili nemoralne odluke, a narcisoidni partneri mogu da budu nečasni ili neverni. Kad je njihov ružičasti pogled na same sebe doveden u pitanje, mogu da postanu ozlojeđeni i agresivni. To je poput bolesti gde se oboleli osećaju prilično dobro, ali ispaštaju ljudi oko njih.
Taken to the extreme, this behavior is classified as a psychological disorder called narcissistic personality disorder. It affects one to two percent of the population, more commonly men. It is also a diagnosis reserved for adults. Young people, especially children, can be very self-centered, but this might just be a normal part of development. The fifth edition of the American Psychiatric Association's Diagnostic and Statistical Manual describes several traits associated with narcissistic personality disorder. They include a grandiose view of oneself, problems with empathy, a sense of entitlement, and a need for admiration or attention. What makes these trait a true personality disorder is that they take over people's lives and cause significant problems. Imagine that instead of caring for your spouse or children, you used them as a source of attention or admiration. Or imagine that instead of seeking constructive feedback about your performance, you instead told everyone who tried to help you that they were wrong.
Kad je dovedeno do ekstrema, ovo ponašanje se klasifikuje kao psihološki poremećaj koji se zove: narcisoidni poremećaj ličnosti. On pogađa jedan do dva procenta populacije, češći je kod muškaraca. Takođe je dijagnoza rezervisana za odrasle. Mladi ljudi, naročito deca, mogu da budu izrazito okrenuti sebi, ali ovo bi moglo da bude prosto normalan deo razvoja. Peto izdanje Dijagnostičkog i statističkog priručnika američkog psihijatrijskog udruženja opisuje nekoliko osobina koje su povezane s narcisoidnim poremećajem ličnosti, uključujući: grandioznu sliku o sebi, probleme s empatijom, osećaj toga šta im pripada i potrebu za divljenjem ili pažnjom. Ono što ove osobine čini poremećajem ličnosti je to što obuzmu ljudske živote i uzrokuju značajne probleme. Zamislite da umesto da brinete za svog supružnika i decu, vi ih koristite kao izvor pažnje ili divljenja. Ili zamislite da umesto da tražite konstruktivnu povratnu informaciju o vašem radu, kažete svima koji pokušaju da vam pomognu da nisu u pravu.
So what causes narcissism? Twin studies show a strong genetic component, although we don't know which genes are involved. But environment matters, too. Parents who put their child on a pedestal can foster grandiose narcissism. And cold, controlling parents can contribute to vulnerable narcissism.
Pa, šta uzrokuje narcisoidnost? Istraživanja o blizancima pokazuju snažan uticaj gena, iako ne znamo o kojim genima je reč. Međutim važna je i okolina. Roditelji koji stavljaju svoju decu na postolje mogu da podstiču grandioznu narcisoidnost. A hladni, autoritativni roditelji mogu da doprinesu ranjivoj narcisoidnosti.
Narcissism also seems to be higher in cultures that value individuality and self-promotion. In the United States, for example, narcissism as a personality trait has been rising since the 1970s, when the communal focus of the 60s gave way to the self-esteem movement and a rise in materialism. More recently, social media has multiplied the possibilities for self-promotion, though it's worth noting that there's no clear evidence that social media causes narcissism. Rather, it provides narcissists a means to seek social status and attention.
Narcisoidnost se takođe čini češćom u kulturama koje cene individualnost i samopromociju. U SAD-u, na primer, narcisoidnost kao crta ličnosti je u usponu od 1970-ih, kada je usredsređenost na zajednicu iz 60-ih prokrčila put pokretu samopoštovanja i usponu materijalizma. U skorije vreme su društveni mediji umnožili mogućnosti samopromocije, iako je važno napomenuti da nema jasnih dokaza da društveni mediji uzrokuju narcisoidnost. Oni pre pružaju narcisima sredstva za traženje društvenog statusa i pažnje.
So can narcissists improve on those negative traits? Yes! Anything that promotes honest reflection on their own behavior and caring for others, like psychotherapy or practicing compassion towards others, can be helpful. The difficulty is it can be challenging for people with narcissistic personality disorder to keep working at self-betterment. For a narcissist, self-reflection is hard from an unflattering angle.
Pa, mogu li narcisi da poprave ove negativne crte? Da! Sve što unapređuje iskren pogled na njihovo ponašanje i brigu za druge može da pomogne, poput psihoterapije ili vežbanja saosećanja prema drugima. Problem je što može da bude izazov za ljude sa narcisoidnim poremećajem ličnosti da nastave da rade na samoizlečenju. Za narcise je samoposmatranje teško kad je iz ugla koji im ne laska.