[This talk contains graphic language and descriptions of sexual violence Viewer discretion is advised]
[Esta charla contén linguaxe gráfica e descricións de violencia sexual. Recoméndase a discreción do espectador]
Tom Stranger: In 1996, when I was 18 years old, I had the golden opportunity to go on an international exchange program. Ironically I'm an Australian who prefers proper icy cold weather, so I was both excited and tearful when I got on a plane to Iceland, after just having farewelled my parents and brothers goodbye. I was welcomed into the home of a beautiful Icelandic family who took me hiking, and helped me get a grasp of the melodic Icelandic language. I struggled a bit with the initial period of homesickness. I snowboarded after school, and I slept a lot. Two hours of chemistry class in a language that you don't yet fully understand can be a pretty good sedative.
Tom Stranger: en 1996, cando tiña 18 años, tiven a oportunidade de ouro de entrar nun programa de intercambio internacional. Ironicamente, son un australiano que prefire climas fríos e xélidos, así que estaba emocionado e ao mesmo tempo triste cando tomei un avión a Islandia, xusto despois de me despedir dos meus pais e irmáns. Fun benvido na casa dunha marabillosa familia islandesa que me levou de excursión e me axudou a comprender a melódica lingua islandesa. Tiven que afacerme un pouco ao período inicial de morriña. Facía snowboard despois da escola, e dormía moito. Dúas horas de química nunha lingua que aínda non entendes completamente pode ser un bo sedante.
(Laughter)
(Risas)
My teacher recommended I try out for the school play, just to get me a bit more socially active. It turns out I didn't end up being part of the play, but through it I met Thordis. We shared a lovely teenage romance, and we'd meet at lunchtimes to just hold hands and walk around old downtown Reykjavík. I met her welcoming family, and she met my friends. We'd been in a budding relationship for a bit over a month when our school's Christmas Ball was held.
O profesor recomendoume facer a proba para a obra de teatro da escola, para que así fose un pouco máis activo socialmente. Resultou que finalmente non formei parte da obra, mais a través dela coñecín a Thordis. Compartimos un fermoso romance adolescente, e quedabamos á hora da comida só para collernos das mans e camiñar polo vello centro de Reykjavík. Eu coñecín a súa encantadora familia, e ela coñeceu os meus amigos. Levabamos saíndo por algo máis dun mes cando se celebrou o baile de Nadal.
Thordis Elva: I was 16 and in love for the first time. Going together to the Christmas dance was a public confirmation of our relationship, and I felt like the luckiest girl in the world. No longer a child, but a young woman. High on my newfound maturity, I felt it was only natural to try drinking rum for the first time that night, too. That was a bad idea. I became very ill, drifting in and out of consciousness in between spasms of convulsive vomiting. The security guards wanted to call me an ambulance, but Tom acted as my knight in shining armor, and told them he'd take me home.
Thordis Elva: tiña 16 e estaba namorada por primeira vez. Ir xuntos ao baile de Nadal era a confirmación pública da nosa relación, e sentinme coma a moza con máis sorte do mundo. Non era xa unha nena, senón unha muller. Emocionada na miña nova e descuberta madurez, pensei que sería natural probar ron por primeira vez aquela noite. Foi unha mala idea. Púxenme moi mal, vagando entre a consciencia e a inconsciencia entre espasmos e convulsións, vomitando. Os gardas de seguridade quixeron pedirme unha ambulancia, mais Tom actuou como o meu cabaleiro de brillante armadura, e díxolles que me levaría el a casa.
It was like a fairy tale, his strong arms around me, laying me in the safety of my bed. But the gratitude that I felt towards him soon turned to horror as he proceeded to take off my clothes and get on top of me. My head had cleared up, but my body was still too weak to fight back, and the pain was blinding. I thought I'd be severed in two. In order to stay sane, I silently counted the seconds on my alarm clock. And ever since that night, I've known that there are 7,200 seconds in two hours.
Foi coma un conto, os seus fortes brazos rodeándome, deitándome na seguridade da miña cama. Porén a gratitude que lle profesaba rapidamente tornouse en horror cando procedeu a quitarme a roupa e poñerse sobre min. De súpeto sentín a cabeza despexada, mais o meu corpo estaba aínda moi débil para opoñerse, e a dor era insoportable. Pensei que ía rachar en dúas. Para me manter lúcida, contei en silencio os segundos no meu espertador. E desde esa noite, souben que hai 7,200 segundos en dúas horas.
Despite limping for days and crying for weeks, this incident didn't fit my ideas about rape like I'd seen on TV. Tom wasn't an armed lunatic; he was my boyfriend. And it didn't happen in a seedy alleyway, it happened in my own bed. By the time I could identify what had happened to me as rape, he had completed his exchange program and left for Australia. So I told myself it was pointless to address what had happened. And besides, it had to have been my fault, somehow.
A pesar de coxear durante días e chorar por semanas, este incidente non encaixaba na idea de violación que eu observara na televisión. Tom non era un lunático armado; era o meu noivo. E non ocorrera nunha sórdida canella, sucedeu na miña propia cama. Para cando puiden recoñecer que fora violada el xa completara o programa de intercambio e regresara a Australia. Así que me dixen que non tiña sentido abordar o sucedido. E ademais, tivo que ser pola miña culpa, de algún xeito.
I was raised in a world where girls are taught that they get raped for a reason. Their skirt was too short, their smile was too wide, their breath smelled of alcohol. And I was guilty of all of those things, so the shame had to be mine. It took me years to realize that only one thing could have stopped me from being raped that night, and it wasn't my skirt, it wasn't my smile, it wasn't my childish trust. The only thing that could've stopped me from being raped that night is the man who raped me -- had he stopped himself.
Crecín nun mundo no que se lles ensina ás nenas que son violadas por un motivo. A súa saia era moi curta, sorría moito, o seu alento cheiraba a alcohol. E eu era culpable de todas aquelas cousas, de xeito que era eu quen debía sentir vergoña. Tardei anos en comprender que só unha cousa puido ter evitado que fose violada aquela noite, e non foi a miña saia, nin o meu sorriso, non foi a miña infantil confianza. O único que puido evitar que fose violada aquela noite foi o home que me violou -- se se detivese.
TS: I have vague memories of the next day: the after effects of drinking, a certain hollowness that I tried to stifle. Nothing more. But I didn't show up at Thordis's door. It is important to now state that I didn't see my deed for what it was. The word "rape" didn't echo around my mind as it should've, and I wasn't crucifying myself with memories of the night before. It wasn't so much a conscious refusal, it was more like any acknowledgment of reality was forbidden. My definition of my actions completely refuted any recognition of the immense trauma I caused Thordis. To be honest, I repudiated the entire act in the days afterwards and when I was committing it. I disavowed the truth by convincing myself it was sex and not rape. And this is a lie I've felt spine-bending guilt for.
TS: teño poucos recordos do día seguinte: os efectos secundarios do alcohol, un certo baleiro que tratei de sufocar. Nada máis. Porén non me presentei na porta de Thordis. É importante agora establecer que eu non vira as miñas accións como o que realmente eran. A palabra "violación" non apareceu na miña mente como debería, e non estaba a me crucificar polos recordos da noite anterior. Non era tanto un rexeitamento consciente, senón máis coma que calquera recoñecemento da realidade estaba prohibido. A miña definición das miñas accións desmentía calquera aceptación do inmenso trauma que lle causei a Thordis. Sendo sincero, repudiei por enteiro a acción nos días posteriores e cando estaba a cometela. Rexeitei a realidade ao convencerme de que era sexo, non unha violación. E esta é unha mentira da cal sinto unha enorme culpa.
I broke up with Thordis a couple of days later, and then saw her a number of times during the remainder of my year in Iceland, feeling a sharp stab of heavyheartedness each time. Deep down, I knew I'd done something immeasurably wrong. But without planning it, I sunk the memories deep, and then I tied a rock to them.
Rompín con Thordis un par de días despois, e logo vina unhas cantas veces durante o resto do meu ano en Islandia, sentindo cada unha desas veces unha intensa punzada de aflición. No fondo, sabía que fixera algo inmensamente mal. Mais sen planealo, afoguei eses recordos, e logo ateilles unha pedra.
What followed is a nine-year period that can best be titled as "Denial and Running." When I got a chance to identify the real torment that I caused, I didn't stand still long enough to do so. Whether it be via distraction, substance use, thrill-seeking or the scrupulous policing of my inner speak, I refused to be static and silent.
O que lle seguiu foi un período de nove anos mellor chamado como "Negación e Fuxida". Cando tiven a oportunidade de identificar o verdadeiro dano que causara, non fun quen de soportar o suficiente como para facelo. Xa fora por distracción, uso de substancias, búsqueda de emocións fortes ou o escrupuloso control da miña voz interior, rexeitei ficar parado e en silencio.
And with this noise, I also drew heavily upon other parts of my life to construct a picture of who I was. I was a surfer, a social science student, a friend to good people, a loved brother and son, an outdoor recreation guide, and eventually, a youth worker. I gripped tight to the simple notion that I wasn't a bad person. I didn't think I had this in my bones. I thought I was made up of something else. In my nurtured upbringing, my loving extended family and role models, people close to me were warm and genuine in their respect shown towards women. It took me a long time to stare down this dark corner of myself, and to ask it questions.
E con este ruído, Tamén recorrín a outras facetas da miña vida para así construír unha imaxe de quen era. Era un surfista, un estudante de ciencias sociais, un bo amigo, un fillo e irmán querido, un guía de actividades ao aire libre, e, finalmente, un traballador xuvenil. Aferreime á idea de que eu non era unha mala persoa. Non pensei que levara isto no sangue. Pensei que eu era distinto. Na educación que recibín, a miña gran familia e modelos a seguir, a xente próxima a min, eran sinceros e amables no respecto que mostraban cara ás mulleres. Levoume tempo sosterlle a mirada a este oscuro recuncho meu, e facerlle preguntas.
TE: Nine years after the Christmas dance, I was 25 years old, and headed straight for a nervous breakdown. My self-worth was buried under a soul-crushing load of silence that isolated me from everyone that I cared about, and I was consumed with misplaced hatred and anger that I took out on myself.
TE: Nove anos despois do baile de Nadal, eu tiña 25 anos, e dirixíame directa cara a un colapso nervioso. A miña autoestima estaba soterrada baixo unha capa de silencio que me illaba de todo aquilo que me importaba, e eu estaba consumida por unha ira e un odio que non me pertencían e que pagaba conmigo mesma.
One day, I stormed out of the door in tears after a fight with a loved one, and I wandered into a café, where I asked the waitress for a pen. I always had a notebook with me, claiming that it was to jot down ideas in moments of inspiration, but the truth was that I needed to be constantly fidgeting, because in moments of stillness, I found myself counting seconds again. But that day, I watched in wonder as the words streamed out of my pen, forming the most pivotal letter I've ever written, addressed to Tom. Along with an account of the violence that he subjected me to, the words, "I want to find forgiveness" stared back at me, surprising nobody more than myself. But deep down I realized that this was my way out of my suffering, because regardless of whether or not he deserved my forgiveness, I deserved peace. My era of shame was over.
Un día, saín pola porta entre bágoas tras unha discusión cunha persoa querida, e entrei nunha cafetería, onde lle pedín un bolígrafo a unha camareira. Sempre levaba unha libreta comigo, alegando que era para anotar ideas en momentos de inspiración, mais a verdade era que eu necesitaba estar en constante movemento, porque en momentos de calma, atopábame de novo contando eses segundos. Porén, aquel día contemplei abraiada como as palabras fluían do meu bolígrafo formando a carta máis importante que xamais escribira, dirixida a Tom. Xunto cunha narración da violencia á que me someteu, as palabras, "Quero atopar perdón" miráronme, sorprendendo a ninguén máis que a min mesma. Agora ben, no fondo, eu dérame conta de que este era a miña forma de saír do sufrimento, porque independentemente de se el merecía ou non o meu perdón, eu merecía paz. A miña era de vergoña rematara.
Before sending the letter, I prepared myself for all kinds of negative responses, or what I found likeliest: no response whatsoever. The only outcome that I didn't prepare myself for was the one that I then got -- a typed confession from Tom, full of disarming regret. As it turns out, he, too, had been imprisoned by silence. And this marked the start of an eight-year-long correspondence that God knows was never easy, but always honest. I relieved myself of the burdens that I'd wrongfully shouldered, and he, in turn, wholeheartedly owned up to what he'd done. Our written exchanges became a platform to dissect the consequences of that night, and they were everything from gut-wrenching to healing beyond words.
Antes de enviar a carta, prepareime para todo tipo de respostas negativas, ou para o que consideraba máis esperable: ningunha resposta en absoluto. O único resultado para o que non me preparei foi o que obtiven entón -- unha confesión escrita de Tom, cargada de sincero arrepentemento. E resultou que el tamén estivera aprisionado polo silencio. E isto marcou o inicio dunha correspondencia de oito anos que Deus sabe nunca foi sinxela, mais si honesta. Eu libereime das cargas que inxustamente levaba ás costas, e el, en resposta, fíxose cargo do que fixera con sinceridade. Os nosos intercambios escritos convertéronse nunha plataforma na que analizar as consecuencias daquela noite, e foron de todo, desde incriblemente dolorosos ata curar por medio das palabras.
And yet, it didn't bring about closure for me. Perhaps because the email format didn't feel personal enough, perhaps because it's easy to be brave when you're hiding behind a computer screen on the other side of the planet. But we'd begun a dialogue that I felt was necessary to explore to its fullest. So, after eight years of writing, and nearly 16 years after that dire night, I mustered the courage to propose a wild idea: that we'd meet up in person and face our past once and for all.
E, con todo, para min non supuxo un punto e final. Quizais porque o formato email non o sentía suficientemente íntimo, quizais porque é sinxelo ser valente cando estas agochado tras unha pantalla de ordenador na otra punta do planeta. Mais comezáramos un diálogo que sentín que era necesario explorar ata o fondo. Así que, despois de oito anos de correspondencia, e case 16 anos despois daquela terrible noite, armeime de valor e propuxen unha loucura: que nos coñecésemos en persoa e afrontásemos o noso pasado dunha vez por todas.
TS: Iceland and Australia are geographically like this. In the middle of the two is South Africa. We decided upon the city of Cape Town, and there we met for one week. The city itself proved to be a stunningly powerful environment to focus on reconciliation and forgiveness. Nowhere else has healing and rapprochement been tested like it has in South Africa. As a nation, South Africa sought to sit within the truth of its past, and to listen to the details of its history. Knowing this only magnified the effect that Cape Town had on us.
TS: Islandia e Australia están xeograficamente así. No medio das dúas está Sudáfrica. Escollimos a cidade de Cape Town, e alí estivemos durante unha semana. A propia cidade resultou ser un poderoso ambiente para a reconciliación e o perdón. En ningún outro lugar a curación e o achegamento púxose máis a proba que en Sudáfrica. Como nación, Sudáfrica tratou de asentarse na verdade do seu pasado e de escoitar os detalles da súa historia. Saber isto só fixo máis intenso o efecto que Cape Town tivera sobre nós.
Over the course of this week, we literally spoke our life stories to each other, from start to finish. And this was about analyzing our own history. We followed a strict policy of being honest, and this also came with a certain exposure, an open-chested vulnerability. There were gutting confessions, and moments where we just absolutely couldn't fathom the other person's experience. The seismic effects of sexual violence were spoken aloud and felt, face to face. At other times, though, we found a soaring clarity, and even some totally unexpected but liberating laughter. When it came down to it, we did out best to listen to each other intently. And our individual realities were aired with an unfiltered purity that couldn't do any less than lighten the soul.
Durante toda esa semana, contamos ao outro literalmente a historia das nosas vidas, de inicio a fin. E isto trataba sobre a análise da nosa propia historia. Seguimos unha estricta política de honestidade, O que trouxo consigo unha certa exposición, e unha aberta vulnerabilidade. Houbo confesións viscerais, e momentos nos que foi posible comprender a experiencia da outra persoa. Os sísmicos efectos da violencia sexual faláronse e sentíronse, cara a cara. Noutras ocasións, sen embargo, atopamos unha gran claridade, e incluso algunha risa totalmente inesperada mais liberadora. Cando chegou o momento, fixemos o mellor para escoitar ao outro con atención. E as nosas realidades individuais transmitíronse tan honestamente que non fixeron máis que aliviar.
TE: Wanting to take revenge is a very human emotion -- instinctual, even. And all I wanted to do for years was to hurt Tom back as deeply as he had hurt me. But had I not found a way out of the hatred and anger, I'm not sure I'd be standing here today. That isn't to say that I didn't have my doubts along the way. When the plane bounced on that landing strip in Cape Town, I remember thinking, "Why did I not just get myself a therapist and a bottle of vodka like a normal person would do?"
TE: A ansia de vinganza é un sentimento moi humano -- instintivo, incluso. E o único que quixen durante anos foi ferir a Tom tan profundamente coma el fixera comigo. Se non tivese atopado un camiño para saír do odio e a ira, non estou segura de se estaría aquí hoxe. O que non quere dicir que non tivese as miñas dúbidas. Cando o avión chegou a aquela pista de aterraxe en Cape Town, lembro que pensei, "Por que non conseguín simplemente un psicólogo e unha botella de vodka, como faría unha persoa normal?"
(Laughter)
(Risas)
At times, our search for understanding in Cape Town felt like an impossible quest, and all I wanted to do was to give up and go home to my loving husband, Vidir, and our son. But despite our difficulties, this journey did result in a victorious feeling that light had triumphed over darkness, that something constructive could be built out of the ruins.
Ás veces, a nosa procura de entendemento en Cape Town parecía misión imposible, e o único que quería era desistir e voltar á casa co meu querido marido, Vidir, e o noso fillo. Mais a pesar das nosas dificultades, esta viaxe resultou nun sentimento de triunfo da luz sobre a oscuridade, de que algo construtivo se podía levantar a partir das ruínas.
I read somewhere that you should try and be the person that you needed when you were younger. And back when I was a teenager, I would have needed to know that the shame wasn't mine, that there's hope after rape, that you can even find happiness, like I share with my husband today. Which is why I started writing feverishly upon my return from Cape Town, resulting in a book co-authored by Tom, that we hope can be of use to people from both ends of the perpetrator-survivor scale. If nothing else, it's a story that we would've needed to hear when we were younger.
Lín nalgures que un debe tratar de ser a persoa que necesitaba cando era xove. E cando era unha adolescente, necesitaría ter sabido que a culpa non era miña, que hai esperanza tras unha violación, que incluso podes atopar felicidade, como a que comparto hoxe co meu home. E por iso, desde a miña chegada de Cape Town comecei a escribir sen parar, resultando isto nun libro escrito conxuntamente con Tom, que esperamos poida ser de axuda para persoas de cada un dos extremos da escala perpetrador-supervivente. Se nada máis, é unha historia que necesitaríamos ter escoitado de novos.
Given the nature of our story, I know the words that inevitably accompany it -- victim, rapist -- and labels are a way to organize concepts, but they can also be dehumanizing in their connotations. Once someone's been deemed a victim, it's that much easier to file them away as someone damaged, dishonored, less than. And likewise, once someone has been branded a rapist, it's that much easier to call him a monster -- inhuman. But how will we understand what it is in human societies that produces violence if we refuse to recognize the humanity of those who commit it? And how --
Dada a natureza da nosa historia, sei cales son as palabras que inevitablemente a acompañan -- vítima, violador -- e as etiquetas son un xeito de organizar conceptos, mais tamén poden resultar nunha deshumanización. Unha vez que alguén é considerado vítima, é moito máis sinxelo catalogalo como alguén ferido, aldraxado, inferior a. E do mesmo xeito, unha vez que alguén é catalogado como violador, é moito máis sinxelo chamalo monstro -- inhumano. Mais como seremos capaces de entender que é o que produce a violencia nas sociedades humanas se nos negamos recoñecer a humanidade de quen a infrinxen? E como --
(Applause)
(Aplausos)
And how can we empower survivors if we're making them feel less than? How can we discuss solutions to one of the biggest threats to the lives of women and children around the world, if the very words we use are part of the problem?
E como podemos axudar ás vítimas se facemos que se sintan inferirores? Como podemos falar de solucións a unha das maiores ameazas contra as vidas de mulleres e nenos no mundo, se mesmo as palabras que empregamos son parte do problema?
TS: From what I've now learnt, my actions that night in 1996 were a self-centered taking. I felt deserving of Thordis's body. I've had primarily positive social influences and examples of equitable behavior around me. But on that occasion, I chose to draw upon the negative ones. The ones that see women as having less intrinsic worth, and of men having some unspoken and symbolic claim to their bodies. These influences I speak of are external to me, though. And it was only me in that room making choices, nobody else.
TS: Polo que aprendín, as miñas accións daquela noite de 1996 foron egocéntricas Sentinme merecedor do corpo de Thordis. Tiven unha gran cantidade de influencias sociais positivas e exemplos de comportamento igualitario arredor meu. Mais naquela ocasión, elexín facer uso das negativas. Aquelas polas que vemos as mulleres coma menos valoradas, e aos homes como os que teñen dereito sobre os seus corpos. Sen embargo, as influencias das que falo son externas a min. E naquela habitación era eu quen estaba a tomar decisións, ninguén máis.
When you own something and really square up to your culpability, I do think a surprising thing can happen. It's what I call a paradox of ownership. I thought I'd buckle under the weight of responsibility. I thought my certificate of humanity would be burnt. Instead, I was offered to really own what I did, and found that it didn't possess the entirety of who I am. Put simply, something you've done doesn't have to constitute the sum of who you are. The noise in my head abated. The indulgent self-pity was starved of oxygen, and it was replaced with the clean air of acceptance -- an acceptance that I did hurt this wonderful person standing next to me; an acceptance that I am part of a large and shockingly everyday grouping of men who have been sexually violent toward their partners.
Cando posuímos algo e realmente aceptamos a nosa culpabilidade, penso que pode suceder algo soprendente. É o que eu chamo paradoxo de propiedade. Pensaba que cedería baixo o peso da responsabilidade. Pensaba que o meu certificado de humanidade se quemaría. No seu lugar, ofrecéuseme o me facer cargo do que fixera, e deime conta de que aquilo non formaba parte de todo o que eu era. Dito doutro xeito, algo que fixeches non ten por que definir completamente quen es. O ruído da miña cabeza calmouse. A indulxente autocompaixón estaba famenta de osíxeno, e foi subsituída polo aire limpo da aceptación -- a aceptación de que ferín a esta marabillosa persoa ó meu carón; a aceptación de que pertenzo a un gran e alarmantemente grupo de homes que exerceron violencia sexual contra as súas parellas.
Don't underestimate the power of words. Saying to Thordis that I raped her changed my accord with myself, as well as with her. But most importantly, the blame transferred from Thordis to me. Far too often, the responsibility is attributed to female survivors of sexual violence, and not to the males who enact it. Far too often, the denial and running leaves all parties at a great distance from the truth. There's definitely a public conversation happening now, and like a lot of people, we're heartened that there's less retreating from this difficult but important discussion. I feel a real responsibility to add our voices to it.
Non subestimedes o poder das palabras. Dicirlle a Thordis que a violei cambiou o acordo que tiña conmigo mesmo, así coma o que tiña con ela. E máis importante, a culpa transferida de Thordis a min. Moi a miúdo, a responsabilidade atribúeselles ás superviventes femininas de violencia sexual, e non aos homes que a perpetran. Moi frecuentemente, a negación e a fuxida deixan a ambas partes moi lonxe da verdade. Sen dúbida agora hai unha conversa pública, e como moita xente, estamos animados de que haxa menos reparos con respecto a esta difícil mais importante discusión. Eu sinto a verdadeira responsabilidade de sumar as nosas voces a isto.
TE: What we did is not a formula that we're prescribing for others. Nobody has the right to tell anyone else how to handle their deepest pain or their greatest error. Breaking your silence is never easy, and depending on where you are in the world, it can even be deadly to speak out about rape. I realize that even the most traumatic event of my life is still a testament to my privilege, because I can talk about it without getting ostracized, or even killed. But with that privilege of having a voice comes the responsibility of using it. That's the least I owe my fellow survivors who can't.
TE: O que fixemos non foi unha fórmula que estamos a prescribir para os demais. Ninguén ten o dereito de dicirlles aos demais como manexar a súa máis fonda dor ou o seu maior erro. Romper o silencio nunca é sinxelo, e dependendo de onde esteas no mundo, pode incluso ser mortal falar sobre a violación. Son consciente de que incluso o evento máis traumático da miña vida segue sendo un testemuño do meu privilexio, porque podo falar sobre isto sen ser excluída, ou incluso asasinada. Porén co privilexio de ter unha voz vén a responsabilidade de empregala. É o mínimo que lles debo ás miñas compañeiras superviventes que non poden.
The story we've just relayed is unique, and yet it is so common with sexual violence being a global pandemic. But it doesn't have to be that way. One of the things that I found useful on my own healing journey is educating myself about sexual violence. And as a result, I've been reading, writing and speaking about this issue for over a decade now, going to conferences around the world. And in my experience, the attendees of such events are almost exclusively women. But it's about time that we stop treating sexual violence as a women's issue.
A historia que acabamos de transmitir é única, e non obstante é moi común xa que a violencia sexual é unha pandemia mundial. Aínda que non ten por que ser así. Unha das cousas que atopei útil no meu propio camiño á curación foi educarme sobre a violencia sexual. Como resultado, estiven lendo, escribindo e falando sobre este tema por máis dunha década, indo a conferencias en todo o mundo. E na miña experiencia, os participantes destas conferencias son case exclusivamente mulleres. Mais é o momento de deixar de tratar a violencia sexual como un tema de mulleres.
(Applause)
(Aplausos)
A majority of sexual violence against women and men is perpetrated by men. And yet their voices are sorely underrepresented in this discussion. But all of us are needed here. Just imagine all the suffering we could alleviate if we dared to face this issue together.
A maioría da violencia sexual hacia mulleres e homes é levada a cabo por homes. Non obstante, as súas voces están sumamente subrepresentadas nesta discusión. Mais é necesario que todos esteamos aquí. Imaxinade todo o sufrimento que poderiamos aliviar se nos atrevésemos a enfrontar isto xuntos.
Thank you.
Grazas.
(Applause)
(Aplausos)