It's wonderful to be here to talk about my journey, to talk about the wheelchair and the freedom it has bought me.
Divno je biti ovdje, pričati o mom putovanju, pričati o invalidskim kolicima i slobodi kojom me to kupilo.
I started using a wheelchair 16 years ago when an extended illness changed the way I could access the world. When I started using the wheelchair, it was a tremendous new freedom. I'd seen my life slip away and become restricted. It was like having an enormous new toy. I could whiz around and feel the wind in my face again. Just being out on the street was exhilarating.
Počela sam koristiti invalidska kolica prije 16 godina kada je dugotrajna bolest promijenila način kojim mogu pristupiti svijetu. Kada sam počela koristiti invalidska kolica, to je bila ogromna nova sloboda. Shvatila sam da mi život izmiče i da je postao ograničen. Ovo je bilo kao da imam novu, ogromnu igračku. Mogla sam zujati uokolo i ponovo osjećati vjetar na svome licu. Samo biti na ulici je bilo uzbudljivo.
But even though I had this newfound joy and freedom, people's reaction completely changed towards me. It was as if they couldn't see me anymore, as if an invisibility cloak had descended. They seemed to see me in terms of their assumptions of what it must be like to be in a wheelchair. When I asked people their associations with the wheelchair, they used words like "limitation," "fear," "pity" and "restriction." I realized I'd internalized these responses and it had changed who I was on a core level. A part of me had become alienated from myself. I was seeing myself not from my perspective, but vividly and continuously from the perspective of other people's responses to me.
Ali iako sam mislila da sam ponovo pronašla sreću i slobodu, reakcije ljudi prema meni potpuno su se promijenile. Izgledalo je kao da me više ne mogu vidjeti, kao da se spustio neki nevidljivi plašt. Činilo se kao da me gledaju u smislu svojih pretpostavki kako to izgleda kada si u invalidskim kolicima. Kada sam upitala ljude na što ih asociraju invalidska kolica, koristili su izraze poput "ograničenje", "strah," "sažaljenje", "restrikcija". Shvatila sam da sam prihvatila te odgovore i to je promijenilo ono tko sam bila u svojoj biti. Dio mene se otuđio. Nisam gledala svoj život iz svoje perspektive, nego živo i neprekidno iz perspektive odgovora koje su mi drugi ljudi davali.
As a result, I knew I needed to make my own stories about this experience, new narratives to reclaim my identity.
Kao rezultat, znala sam da moram stvoriti vlastite priče o ovom iskustvu, nove priče da vratim svoj identitet.
["Finding Freedom: 'By creating our own stories we learn to take the texts of our lives as seriously as we do 'official' narratives.' — Davis 2009, TEDx Women"]
["Tražeći slobodu: Kreiranjem vlastite priče, učimo uzimati tekstove iz naših života toliko ozbiljno kao i službene priče".- Davis 2009, TEDx Women]
I started making work that aimed to communicate something of the joy and freedom I felt when using a wheelchair -- a power chair -- to negotiate the world. I was working to transform these internalized responses, to transform the preconceptions that had so shaped my identity when I started using a wheelchair, by creating unexpected images. The wheelchair became an object to paint and play with. When I literally started leaving traces of my joy and freedom, it was exciting to see the interested and surprised responses from people. It seemed to open up new perspectives, and therein lay the paradigm shift. It showed that an arts practice can remake one's identity and transform preconceptions by revisioning the familiar.
Počela sam s poslom koji je imao cilj komunicirati o sreći i slobodi koje sam osjećala koristeći invalidska kolica -- moćna kolica -- kako bih pregovarala sa svijetom. Radila sam kako bih transformirala te unutarnje odgovore, kako bih transformirala predrasude koje su formirale moj identitet kada sam počela koristiti invalidska kolica, kreirajući neočekivane slike. Kolica su postala objekt za crtanje i igranje. Kada sam doslovno počela ostavljati tragove sreće i slobode, bilo je vrlo uzbudljivo vidjeti zanimljive i iznenadne odgovore ljudi. Činilo se da se otvaraju nove perspektive i u tome leži promjena paradigme. To je pokazalo da praksa umjetnosti može popraviti nečiji identitet i transformirati predrasude revizijom poznatog.
So when I began to dive, in 2005, I realized scuba gear extends your range of activity in just the same way as a wheelchair does, but the associations attached to scuba gear are ones of excitement and adventure, completely different to people's responses to the wheelchair.
Kada sam počela roniti, 2005. godine, shvatila sam da oprema za ronjenje proširuje granice aktivnosti na isti način kao što to čine invalidska kolica, ali asocijacije koje se povezuju s opremom za ronjenje su uzbudljive i pustolovne, potpuno drugačije od odgovora ljudi prema invalidskim kolicima.
So I thought, "I wonder what'll happen if I put the two together?" (Laughter) (Applause) And the underwater wheelchair that has resulted has taken me on the most amazing journey over the last seven years.
Pomislila sam, "Pitam se što će se desiti ako to dvoje ujedinim?" (Smijeh)(Pljesak) Podvodna invalidska kolica koja su bila rezultat toga, odvela su me na najljepše putovanje u posljednjih sedam godina.
So to give you an idea of what that's like, I'd like to share with you one of the outcomes from creating this spectacle, and show you what an amazing journey it's taken me on.
Kako bih vam mogla dati ideju kako to, zapravo, izgleda, željela bih s vama podijeliti jedan od ishoda kreiranja ovog spektakla i pokazati vam na kakvo me nevjerovatno putovanje to odvelo.
(Music)
(Glazba)
(Applause)
(Pljesak)
It is the most amazing experience, beyond most other things I've experienced in life. I literally have the freedom to move in 360 degrees of space and an ecstatic experience of joy and freedom.
To je najnevjerojatnije iskustvo, nadilazi većinu ostalih stvari koje sam u životu iskusila. Doslovno sam bila slobodna kretati se za 360 stupnjeva, uz prekrasno iskustvo sreće i slobode.
And the incredibly unexpected thing is that other people seem to see and feel that too. Their eyes literally light up, and they say things like, "I want one of those," or, "If you can do that, I can do anything."
I nevjerojatna neočekivana stvar je što se činilo da to isto tako i drugi ljudi vide i osjećaju. Oči im doslovno zasjaju i govore stvari poput "I ja bih jedne ovakve", ili, "Ako ti možeš to, ja mogu sve."
And I'm thinking, it's because in that moment of them seeing an object they have no frame of reference for, or so transcends the frames of reference they have with the wheelchair, they have to think in a completely new way. And I think that moment of completely new thought perhaps creates a freedom that spreads to the rest of other people's lives. For me, this means that they're seeing the value of difference, the joy it brings when instead of focusing on loss or limitation, we see and discover the power and joy of seeing the world from exciting new perspectives. For me, the wheelchair becomes a vehicle for transformation. In fact, I now call the underwater wheelchair "Portal," because it's literally pushed me through into a new way of being, into new dimensions and into a new level of consciousness.
I razmišljam, to je zato što u tom trenutku gledaju stvar za koju nemaju referentni okvir, ili nadilazi referentne okvire koje imaju s pojmom invalidskih kolica, moraju razmišljati na posve novi način. I mislim da upravo taj moment posve novog razmišljanja vjerojatno kreira slobodu koja se širi do kraja ljudskim životima. Za mene, ovo znači da oni vide vrijednost razlike, radost koju to donosi, kada umjesto fokusiranja na gubitak ili ograničenje, vidimo i otkrijemo snagu i sreću gledanja na svijet iz posve nove perspektive. Za mene, invalidska kolica su postala vozilo preobrazbe. Zapravo, sada podvodna kolica zovem "Portal", zato što me doslovno guraju kroz novi način postojanja, u novu dimenziju i novi nivo svijesti.
And the other thing is, that because nobody's seen or heard of an underwater wheelchair before, and creating this spectacle is about creating new ways of seeing, being and knowing, now you have this concept in your mind. You're all part of the artwork too.
I druga stvar je ta, jer nitko prije nije vidio niti čuo o podvodnim invalidskim kolicima i stvaranje ovog spektakla je stvaranje novih načina gledanja, postojanja i znanja, sada imate taj koncept u svojoj glavi. I vi svi ste, također, dio umjetničkog rada.
(Applause)
(Pljesak)