Today I stand before you as a man who lives life to the full in the here and now. But for a long time, I lived for death.
Danas stojim pred vama kao čovek koji živi život u celosti ovde i sada. Međutim, dugo vremena, živeo sam za smrt.
I was a young man who believed that jihad is to be understood in the language of force and violence. I tried to right wrongs through power and aggression. I had deep concerns for the suffering of others and a strong desire to help and bring relief to them. I thought violent jihad was noble, chivalrous and the best way to help.
Bio sam mladić koji je verovao da džihad treba razumeti jezikom sile i nasilja. Pokušao sam da ispravim nepravde kroz snagu i agresiju. Duboko sam se brinuo zbog patnje drugih i imao sam snažnu želju da pomognem i da im donesem olakšanje. Mislio sam da je nasilni džihad plemenit, viteški i najbolji način da se pomogne.
At a time when so many of our people -- young people especially -- are at risk of radicalization through groups like al-Qaeda, Islamic State and others, when these groups are claiming that their horrific brutality and violence are true jihad, I want to say that their idea of jihad is wrong -- completely wrong -- as was mine, then.
U vreme kada je toliko naših ljudi - pogotovo mladih - pod rizikom od radikalizacije kroz grupe kao što je Al Kaida, Islamska država i druge, kada te grupe tvrde da njihova stravična brutalnost i nasilje predstavljaju pravi džihad, želim da kažem da je njihova predstava o džihadu pogrešna, potpuno pogrešna, kao što je bila i moja tada.
Jihad means to strive to one's utmost. It includes exertion and spirituality, self-purification and devotion. It refers to positive transformation through learning, wisdom and remembrance of God. The word jihad stands for all those meanings as a whole. Jihad may at times take the form of fighting, but only sometimes, under strict conditions, within rules and limits.
Džihad znači težiti ka svom maksimumu. On podrazumeva ulaganje truda i spiritualnost, samopročišćavanje i posvećenost. Odnosi se na pozitivan preobražaj kroz učenje, mudrost i podsećanje na boga. Reč „džihad“ podrazumeva sva ta značenja ujedno. Džihad povremeno može poprimiti oblik borbe, ali samo ponekad, pod strogim uslovima, u okviru pravila i ograničenja.
In Islam, the benefit of an act must outweigh the harm or hardship it entails. More importantly, the verses in the Koran that are connected to jihad or fighting do not cancel out the verses that talk about forgiveness, benevolence or patience.
U islamu, mora biti više koristi nekog čina od štete i nedaća koje povlači sa sobom. Što je još važnije, stihovi iz Kurana koji su vezani za džihad ili borbu ne isključuju stihove koji govore o opraštanju, dobročinstvu ili strpljenju.
But now I believe that there are no circumstances on earth where violent jihad is permissible, because it will lead to greater harm. But now the idea of jihad has been hijacked. It has been perverted to mean violent struggle wherever Muslims are undergoing difficulties, and turned into terrorism by fascistic Islamists like al-Qaeda, Islamic State and others. But I have come to understand that true jihad means striving to the utmost to strengthen and live those qualities which God loves: honesty, trustworthiness, compassion, benevolence, reliability, respect, truthfulness -- human values that so many of us share.
Međutim, danas smatram da ne postoje okolnosti na svetu u kojima je nasilni džihad dopustiv, jer će dovesti do veće štete. Međutim, danas je ideja o džihadu zaplenjena. Izopačena je tako da označava nasilnu borbu gde god muslimani prolaze kroz teškoće i preokrenuta u terorizam od strane fašističkih islamista kao što je Al Kaida, Islamska država i druge. Ipak, shvatio sam da istinski džihad znači težiti ka maksimumu da bismo ojačali i oživeli one osobine koje bog voli: iskrenost, poverenje, saosećanje, dobronamernost, pouzdanost, poštovanje, istinoljubivost - ljudske vrednosti koje dele mnogi od nas.
I was born in Bangladesh, but grew up mostly in England. And I went to school here. My father was an academic, and we were in the UK through his work.
Rođen sam u Bangladešu, ali sam uglavnom odrastao u Engleskoj. Išao sam u školu ovde. Moj otac je bio naučnik i bili smo u Ujedinjenom Kraljevstvu preko njegovog rada.
In 1971 we were in Bangladesh when everything changed. The War of Independence impacted upon us terribly, pitting family against family, neighbor against neighbor. And at the age of 12 I experienced war, destitution in my family, the deaths of 22 of my relatives in horrible ways, as well as the murder of my elder brother. I witnessed killing ... animals feeding on corpses in the streets, starvation all around me, wanton, horrific violence -- senseless violence. I was a young man, teenager, fascinated by ideas. I wanted to learn, but I could not go to school for four years.
Godine 1971, bili smo u Bangladešu kada se sve promenilo. Rat za nezavisnost se užasno odrazio na nas, suprotstavljajući porodicu protiv porodice, komšiju protiv komšije. U 12. godini sam doživeo rat, siromaštvo u svojoj porodici, smrt 22 rođaka na užasne načine, kao i ubistvo svog starijeg brata. Bio sam svedok ubijanja, životinja koje se hrane leševima po ulicama, gladovanja svuda oko mene, bezobzirno, stravično nasilje - besmisleno nasilje. Bio sam mlad, tinejdžer, fasciniran idejama. Želeo sam da učim, ali nisam mogao da idem u školu tokom četiri godine.
After the War of Independence, my father was put in prison for two and a half years, and I used to visit him every week in prison, and homeschooled myself. My father was released in 1973 and he fled to England as a refugee, and we soon followed him. I was 17.
Nakon rata za nezavisnost, mog oca su smestili u zatvor na dve i po godine, a ja sam ga posećivao u zatvoru svake nedelje i podučavao sam sebe kod kuće. Moj otac je pušten na slobodu 1973. godine i pobegao je u Englesku kao izbeglica, a mi smo uskoro krenuli za njim. Imao sam 17 godina.
So these experiences gave me a sharp awareness of the atrocities and injustices in the world. And I had a strong desire -- a very keen, deep desire -- to right wrongs and help the victims of oppression.
Ova iskustva su mi pružila izrazitu svesnost o svirepostima i nepravdama u svetu. Imao sam snažnu želju - veoma žestoku, duboku želju - da ispravim nepravde i pomognem žrtvama ugnjetavanja.
While studying at college in the UK, I met others who showed me how I could channel that desire and help through my religion. And I was radicalized -- enough to consider violence correct, even a virtue under certain circumstances.
Dok sam studirao na fakultetu u Ujedinjenom Kraljevstvu, sretao sam druge koji su mi pokazali kako da kanališem tu želju i da pomognem kroz svoju religiju. Bio sam radikalizovan, dovoljno da smatram nasilje ispravnim, čak i vrlinom pod određenim okolnostima.
So I became involved in the jihad in Afghanistan. I wanted to protect the Muslim Afghan population against the Soviet army. And I thought that was jihad: my sacred duty, which would be rewarded by God.
Tako sam se priključio džihadu u Avganistanu. Hteo sam da zaštitim muslimansko stanovništvo Avganistana od sovjetske vojske. Mislio sam da je to džihad, moja sveta dužnost, koju će bog nagraditi.
I became a preacher. I was one of the pioneers of violent jihad in the UK. I recruited, I raised funds, I trained. I confused true jihad with this perversion as presented by the fascist Islamists -- these people who use the idea of jihad to justify their lust for power, authority and control on earth: a perversion perpetuated today by fascist Islamist groups like al-Qaeda, Islamic State and others.
Postao sam propovednik. Bio sam jedan od pionira nasilnog džihada u Ujedinjenom Kraljevstvu. Regrutovao sam, prikupljao sredstva, obučavao sam. Pomešao sam pravi džihad sa ovom izopačenošću kako su je predstavili fašistički islamisti - ti ljudi koji koriste ideju o džihadu da bi opravdali svoju žudnju za moći, autoritetom i kontrolom na zemlji, sa izopačenošću koju danas održavaju fašističke islamističke grupe kao što su Al Kaida, Islamska država i druge.
For a period of around 15 years, I fought for short periods of time in Kashmir and Burma, besides Afghanistan. Our aim was to remove the invaders, to bring relief to the oppressed victims and of course to establish an Islamic state, a caliphate for God's rule. And I did this openly. I didn't break any laws. I was proud and grateful to be British -- I still am. And I bore no hostility against this, my country, nor enmity towards the non-Muslim citizens, and I still don't.
Tokom perioda od oko 15 godina, borio sam se na kraće vreme u Kašmiru i Burmi, pored Avganistana. Naš cilj je bio da uklonimo okupatore, da donesemo olakšanje potlačenim žrtvama i, naravno, da uspostavimo Islamsku državu, kalifat za božju vladavinu. Radio sam ovo otvoreno. Nisam prekršio nijedan zakon. Bio sam ponosan i zahvalan što sam Britanac - i još uvek sam. Nisam gajio nikakvo neprijateljstvo protiv ove, moje zemlje, niti mržnju prema nemuslimanima, i ne gajim ih ni danas.
During one battle in Afghanistan, some British men and I formed a special bond with a 15-year-old Afghani boy, Abdullah, an innocent, loving and lovable kid who was always eager to please. He was poor. And boys like him did menial tasks in the camp. And he seemed happy enough, but I couldn't help wonder -- his parents must have missed him dearly. And they must have dreamt about a better future for him. A victim of circumstance caught up in a war, cruelly thrust upon him by the cruel circumstances of the time.
Za vreme jedne bitke u Avganistanu, neki muškarci iz Britanije i ja smo se naročito povezali sa avganistanskim dečakom od 15 godina, Abdulahom, nevinim i simpatičnim detetom sa puno ljubavi koje je uvek bilo željno da udovolji. Bio je siromašan. Dečaci poput njega su obavljali fizičke poslove u kampu. Delovao je sasvim srećno, ali nisam mogao da se ne zapitam - mora da je jako nedostajao svojim roditeljima. Mora da su maštali o boljoj budućnosti za njega. Žrtva okolnosti obuhvaćena ratom koji su nemilosrdno bacile na njega okrutne okolnosti tog vremena.
One day I picked up this unexploded mortar shell in a trench, and I had it deposited in a makeshift mud hut lab. And I went out on a short, pointless skirmish -- always pointless, And I came back a few hours later to discover he was dead. He had tried to recover explosives from that shell. It exploded, and he died a violent death, blown to bits by the very same device that had proved harmless to me. So I started to question. How did his death serve any purpose? Why did he die and I lived?
Jednog dana sam podigao neeksplodiranu granatu u rovu i položio sam je u improvizovanu laboratoriju od blata. Otišao sam u kratki, besmisleni okršaj, uvek besmislen, i vratio sam se nekoliko sati kasnije da bih otkrio da je mrtav. Pokušao je da izvuče eksplozive iz te granate. Eksplodirala je i umro je nasilnom smrću, tako što ga je raznela na komade ista naprava koja se kod mene pokazala kao bezopasna. Počeo sam da postavljam pitanja. Kako je njegova smrt poslužila bilo kojoj svrsi? Zašto je on umro, a ja sam preživeo?
I carried on. I fought in Kashmir. I also recruited for the Philippines, Bosnia and Chechnya. And the questions grew.
Nastavio sam dalje. Borio sam se u Kašmiru. Takođe sam regrutovao za Filipine, Bosnu i Čečeniju. Pitanja je bilo sve više.
Later in Burma, I came across Rohingya fighters, who were barely teenagers, born and brought up in the jungle, carrying machine guns and grenade launchers. I met two 13-year-olds with soft manners and gentle voices. Looking at me, they begged me to take them away to England. They simply wanted to go to school -- that was their dream. My family -- my children of the same age -- were living at home in the UK, going to school, living a safe life. And I couldn't help wonder how much these young boys must have spoken to one another about their dreams for such a life. Victims of circumstances: these two young boys, sleeping rough on the ground, looking up at the stars, cynically exploited by their leaders for their personal lust for glory and power.
Kasnije, u Burmi, naišao sam na ratnike Rohindža koji jedva da su bili tinejdžeri, rođeni i odgajani u džungli, noseći mitraljeze i minobacače. Upoznao sam dva trinaestogodišnjaka sa finim manirima i nežnim glasovima. Gledajući me, molili su me da ih odvedem u Englesku. Jednostavno su želeli da idu u školu; to je bio njihov san. Moja porodica - moja deca istog uzrasta, živela su kod kuće u Ujedinjenom Kraljevstvu, išla u školu i vodila bezbedan život. Nisam mogao da se ne zapitam koliko mora da su ti dečaci međusobno razgovarali o svojim snovima o takvom životu. Žrtve okolnosti, ova dva dečaka koja spavaju na gruboj zemlji, gledaju u zvezde, cinično eksploatisani od svojih lidera zarad njihove lične pohlepe za slavom i moći.
I soon witnessed boys like them killing one another in conflicts between rival groups. And it was the same everywhere ... Afghanistan, Kashmir, Burma, Philippines, Chechnya; petty warlords got the young and vulnerable to kill one another in the name of jihad. Muslims against Muslims. Not protecting anyone against invaders or occupiers; not bringing relief to the oppressed. Children being used, cynically exploited; people dying in conflicts which I was supporting in the name of jihad. And it still carries on today.
Uskoro sam prisustvovao kada su se dečaci poput njih ubijali međusobno u konfliktima suprotstavljenih grupa. Svuda je bilo isto - u Avganistanu, Kašmiru, Burmi, Filipinima, Čečeniji - sitni gospodari rata su navodili mlade i ranjive da ubijaju jedni druge u ime džihada. Muslimani protiv muslimana. Nisu štitili nikoga od napadača ili okupatora, niti su donosili olakšanje potlačenima. Deca su iskorišćavana, cinično izrabljivana; ljudi su umirali u konfliktima koje sam podržavao u ime džihada. To se i dalje danas nastavlja.
Realizing that the violent jihad I had engaged in abroad was so different -- such a chasm between what I had experienced and what I thought was sacred duty -- I had to reflect on my activities here in the UK. I had to consider my preaching, recruiting, fund-raising, training, but most importantly, radicalizing -- sending young people to fight and die as I was doing -- all totally wrong.
Shvativiši da je nasilni džihad u kome sam bio uključen u inostranstvu bio toliko drugačiji - takav jaz između onoga što sam doživeo i što sam smatrao da je sveta dužnost - morao sam da se osvrnem na svoje aktivnosti ovde, u Ujedinjenom Kraljevstvu. Morao sam da razmotrim svoje propovedanje, regrutovanje, prikupljanje sredstava, obučavanje, ali najvažnije, radikalizaciju - slanje mladih ljudi da se bore i umiru kao što sam činio - sve potpuno pogrešno.
So I got involved in violent jihad in the mid '80s, starting with Afghanistan. And by the time I finished it was in the year 2000. I was completely immersed in it. All around me people supported, applauded, even celebrated what we were doing in their name. But by the time I learned to get out, completely disillusioned in the year 2000, 15 years had passed.
Uključio sam se u nasilni džihad sredinom '80-ih godina, počevši od Avganistana. Kada sam završio, bila je 2000. godina. Potpuno sam bio unesen u njega. Svuda oko mene ljudi su podržavali, aplaudirali, čak i slavili ono što smo činili u njihovo ime. Međutim, onda kada sam spoznao da treba da izađem, potpuno razbijenih iluzija 2000. godine, 15 godina je prošlo.
So what goes wrong? We were so busy talking about virtue, and we were blinded by a cause. And we did not give ourselves a chance to develop a virtuous character. We told ourselves we were fighting for the oppressed, but these were unwinnable wars. We became the very instrument through which more deaths occurred, complicit in causing further misery for the selfish benefit of the cruel few.
Dakle, šta krene naopako? Bili smo tako zauzeti govoreći o vrlini i bili smo zaslepljeni ciljem. Nismo dali sebi priliku da razvijemo čestitu ličnost. Govorili smo sebi da se borimo za ugnjetavane, ali to su bili ratovi koji se nisu mogli izvojevati. Postali smo upravo oruđe kroz koje je dolazilo do više smrti, saučesnici u izazivanju dalje bede zarad sebične koristi okrutne nekolicine.
So over time, a very long time, I opened my eyes. I began to dare to face the truth, to think, to face the hard questions. I got in touch with my soul.
Tako sam vremenom, nakon vrlo dužeg vremena, otvorio oči. Postepeno sam se osmelio da se suočim sa istinom, da razmislim, da se suočim sa teškim pitanjima. Stupio sam u kontakt sa svojom dušom.
What have I learned? That people who engage in violent jihadism, that people who are drawn to these types of extremisms, are not that different to everyone else. But I believe such people can change. They can regain their hearts and restore them by filling them with human values that heal.
Šta sam naučio? Da ljudi koji se angažuju u nasilnom džihadu, ti ljudi koje privlači takva vrsta ekstremizma, nisu toliko drugačiji od bilo koga drugog. Ipak, verujem da se takvi ljudi mogu promeniti. Mogu da povrate svoje srce i oporave ga ispunivši ga ljudskim vrednostima koje isceljuju.
When we ignore the realities, we discover that we accept what we are told without critical reflection. And we ignore the gifts and advantages that many of us would cherish even for a single moment in their lives. I engaged in actions I thought were correct. But now I began to question how I knew what I knew. I endlessly told others to accept the truth, but I failed to give doubt its rightful place.
Kada ignorišemo stvarnost, otkrijemo da prihvatamo šta nam se kaže bez kritičkog osvrtanja. Ignorišemo darove i prilike koje bi mnogi od nas cenili čak i samo na jedan trenutak u životu. Angažovao sam se u akcijama za koje sam smatrao da su ispravne. Međutim, sada počinjem da preispitujem kako sam znao ono što sam znao. Beskrajno sam govorio drugima da prihvate istinu, ali nisam uspeo da dam sumnji mesto koje joj s pravom pripada.
This conviction that people can change is rooted in my experience, my own journey. Through wide reading, reflecting, contemplation, self-knowledge, I discovered, I realized that Islamists' world of us and them is false and unjust. Through considering the uncertainties in all that we had asserted, to the inviolable truths, incontestable truths, I developed a more nuanced understanding.
Ovo ubeđenje da se ljudi mogu promeniti ukorenjeno je u mom iskustvu, mom sopstvenom putovanju. Kroz mnogo čitanja, kroz razmišljanje, duboko razmatranje, samosaznavanje, otkrio sam, shvatio sam da je islamistički svet nas i njih lažan i nepravedan. Kroz razmatranje neizvesnosti u svemu tome što smo tvrdili da su neprikosnovene istine, neosporne istine, razvio sam prefinjenije razumevanje.
I realized that in a world crowded with variation and contradiction, foolish preachers, only foolish preachers like I used to be, see no paradox in the myths and fictions they use to assert authenticity. So I understood the vital importance of self-knowledge, political awareness and the necessity for a deep and wide understanding of our commitments and our actions, how they affect others.
Shvatio sam da u svetu prepunom odstupanja i protivrečnosti, budalasti propovednici, samo budalasti propovednici kakav sam i ja nekad bio, ne vide paradoks u mitovima i izmišljotinama koje koriste da bi tvrdili autentičnost. Stoga sam razumeo presudan značaj samosaznavanja, političke svesnosti i nužnosti za dubokim i širokim razumevanjem naše posvećenosti i akcija, načina na koji utiču na druge.
So my plea today to everyone, especially those who sincerely believe in Islamist jihadism ... refuse dogmatic authority; let go of anger, hatred and violence; learn to right wrongs without even attempting to justify cruel, unjust and futile behavior. Instead create a few beautiful and useful things that outlive us. Approach the world, life, with love. Learn to develop or cultivate your hearts to see goodness, beauty and truth in others and in the world. That way we do matter more to ourselves ... to each other, to our communities and, for me, to God. This is jihad -- my true jihad.
Moja današnja molba za sve, naročito one koji iskreno veruju u islamistički džihadizam - odbacite dogmatski autoritet; otpustite bes, mržnju i nasilje; naučite da ispravite nepravde bez ikakvog pokušaja da opravdate surovo, nepravedno i uzaludno ponašanje. Umesto toga, stvorite nekoliko lepih i korisnih stvari koje će nas nadživeti. Pristupite svetu i životu sa ljubavlju. Naučite da razvijate ili negujete svoje srce tako da vidi dobrotu, lepotu i istinu u drugima i u svetu. Na taj način zaista pridajemo više značaja sebi, jedni drugima, svojim zajednicama, i, što se mene tiče, bogu. To je džihad, moj pravi džihad.
Thank you.
Hvala.
(Applause)
(Aplauz)