[This talk contains mature content]
[Govor uključuje sadržaj za odrasle]
In 1969, I was standing behind a Sylvania black-and-white television set. Hearing about these things happening on the set in the front, I was the guy, you know, moving the rabbit ears for my dad, and my sister and my mom. "Move over here, turn over here, move this way, we can't see the screen." And what they were watching was: "One small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind." Neil [Armstrong] and Buzz Aldrin were walking on the Moon. And I was five years old in Lynchburg, Virginia, a skinny black kid in a kind of somewhat racist town. And I was trying to figure out what I was going to do with my life. And my parents, you know, they were educators, they'd said that you can do anything. But after that moon landing, all the kids in the neighborhood were like, "You're going to be an astronaut?" I'm like, "No." I don't want a buzz cut, and I don't see someone who looks like me. Because representation does matter.
Godine 1969. stajao sam iza starog crno-bijelog televizijskog seta, slušajući o stvarima koje su se događale na televizoru ispred. Ja sam bio taj, znate, koji je pomicao antenu za moga oca, za sestru i mamu. "Pomakni ovdje, okreni tamo, makni na onu stranu, ne vidimo ekran." A ono što su gledali bilo je: "Ovo je mali korak za čovjeka, ali veliki skok za čovječanstvo." Neil [Armstrong] i Buzz Aldrin šetali su po Mjesecu. A ja sam bio petogodišnjak iz Lynchburga u Virginiji, mršavi crni dječak u pomalo rasističkom gradiću. I pokušavao sam shvatiti što ću učiniti sa svojim životom. A moji su roditelji, znate, bili učitelji, rekli su da možeš učiniti bilo što. No nakon slijetanja na Mjesec, sva djeca u susjedstvu su govorila: "Hoćeš li biti astronaut?" A ja bih rekao: "Ne." Ne želim biti kratko ošišan, a i ne vidim nekoga tko izgleda kao ja. Jer zastupljenost je zaista važna.
And I knew that there was a guy five blocks down the street on Pierce Street who was training to play tennis. And it was Arthur Ashe. And my dad talked about his character, his discipline, his intelligence, his athleticism. I wanted to be Arthur Ashe, I didn't want to be one of those moon guys.
Znao sam za jednog dečka, pet blokova kuća niz ulicu iz ulice Pierce, koji je trenirao tenis. Zvao se Arhur Ashe. Moj je otac govorio o njegovom karakteru i disciplini, njegovoj inteligenciji i kondiciji. Ja sam htio biti Arhur Ashe, nisam želio biti jedan od onih astronauta.
And as I went on through this journey, my dad, who was a school teacher, he played in a band, he did all these things to make money for my sister and I to take piano lessons and do these different things with education. And he one day decides to drive up into the driveway with this bread truck. And I'm thinking, "OK, bread truck, me delivering bread while my dad's driving the truck." I'm like, "OK, I'm going to be a bread guy now." But he says, "This is our camper." I'm like, "Dude, come one, I can read: 'Merita Bread and Rolls' on the side of this truck. And he says, "No, we're going to build this into our camper." And over that summer, we rewired the entire electrical system. We plumbed a propane tank to a Coleman stove, we built bunk beds that flip down. We were turning this into our summer vacation launch pad, escape pod, this thing that could take us out of Lynchburg.
I kako sam prolazio kroz ovo iskustvo, moj otac, koji je bio učitelj u školi, svirao je u bendu, radio je mnogo stvari da zaradi novac za moju sestru i mene da učimo svirati klavir i radimo različite stvari za obrazovanje. I jednog dana odlučio je doći kući nekakvim pekarskim kombijem. A ja sam mislio: "U redu, pekarski kombi, ja dostavljam kruh dok moj otac vozi kombi." Mislio sam: "Izgleda da ću biti dostavljač kruha." Ali on je rekao: "Ovo je naš kamper." A ja mu kažem: "Ajde, mogu pročitati 'Merita kruh i peciva', piše sa strane ovog kombija. A on mi reče: "Ne, od ovog ćemo napraviti naš kamper." I tijekom tog ljeta, prespojili smo cijeli električni sustav. Spojili smo spremnik za propan s Coleman peći, sagradili smo krevete na kat s preklopom nadolje. Pretvarali smo ga u kapsulu za spas tijekom ljetnog odmora, u stvar koja nas može izvući iz Lynchburga.
And before that, I was actually raped at five by some neighbors. And I didn't tell anyone, because I had friends that didn't have fathers. And I knew that my father would have killed the people that did that to his son. And I didn't want my father to be gone.
A prije toga, zapravo su me silovali susjedi kada sam imao pet godina. Nisam rekao nikome, jer sam imao prijatelja koji nisu imali očeve. A znao sam da bi moj otac ubio ljude koji su to učinili njegovom sinu. A nisam želio da mi otac bude odveden.
So as we got in this bread truck and escaped from Lynchburg, it was my time with my dad. And we went to the Smoky Mountains and looked at the purple mountains' majesty. And we walked along the beach in Myrtle Beach, and this thing was transformative. It showed me what it meant to be an explorer, at a very early age. And I suppressed all that negativity, all that trauma, because I was learning to be an explorer.
Dakle, kad smo ušli u ovaj pekarski kamion i pobjegli iz Lynchburga, bilo je to moje vrijeme s ocem. Otišli smo do nacionalnog parka Smoky Mountains i gledali njegovu ljubičastu veličanstvenost. I šetali smo plažom u Myrtle Beachu, to je bilo transformativno iskustvo. Pokazalo mi je što to znači biti istraživač, u vrlo mladoj dobi. A ja sam potisnuo svu tu negativnost, svu tu traumu, zato što sam učio kako biti istraživač.
And a little bit later, my mother gave me an age-inappropriate, non-OSHA-certified chemistry set,
A malo kasnije, moja majka mi je dala, neprikladan za moju dob, ne baš posve siguran set za kemiju,
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
where I created the most incredible explosion in her living room.
kojim sam izveo nevjerojatne eksplozije u njenoj dnevnoj sobi.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
And so I knew I could be a chemist. So as I went on this journey through a high school, and I went to college, and I got a football scholarship to play football in college. And I knew that I could be a chemist, because I'd already blown stuff up.
Tako sam znao da mogu biti kemičar. I tako sam krenuo na putovanje kroz srednju školu, upisao sam fakultet i dobio stipendiju za igranje američkog nogometa na fakultetu. A znao sam da mogu biti kemičar, jer sam već prije raznio neke stvari.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
And when I graduated, I got drafted to the Detroit Lions. But I pulled a hamstring in training camp, and so what every former NFL player does, they go work for NASA, right? So I went to work for NASA.
I kada sam diplomirao, pozvan sam u momčad Detroit Lions. Ali ozlijedio sam tetivu u kampu za treninge i tako, što svaki bivši sportaš učini, ode raditi za NASA-u, zar ne? Zato sam otišao u NASA-u.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
And this friend of mine said, "Leland, you'd be great astronaut." I just laughed at him, I was like, "Yeah, me, an astronaut?" You know that Neil and Buzz thing from back in '69? And he handed me an application, and I looked at it, and I didn't fill it out. And that same year, another friend of mine filled out the application and he got in. And I said to myself, "If NASA's letting knuckleheads like that be astronauts,"
Prijatelj mi je rekao: "Lelande, ti bi bio odličan astronaut." Samo sam se nasmijao i rekao: "Da baš, ja, astronaut?" Sjećaš li se Neila i Buzza, onoga iz 1969.? I predao mi je prijavu, pogledao sam je, ali je nisam ispunio. A te iste godine, još je jedan moj prijatelj ispunio prijavu i primili su ga. Rekao sam sam sebi: "Ako NASA prima takve tupane za astronaute,"
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
"maybe I can be one, too."
"možda i ja to mogu postati."
So the next selection, I filled out the application, and I got in. And I didn't know what it meant to be an astronaut: the training, the simulations, all these things to get you ready for this countdown: three, two, one, liftoff. And in 2007, I was in Space Shuttle "Atlantis," careening off the planet, traveling at 17,500 miles per hour. And eight and a half minutes later, the main engines cut off, and we're now floating in space. And I push off and float over to the window, and I can see the Caribbean. And I need new definitions of blue to describe the colors that I see. Azure, indigo, navy blue, medium navy blue, turquoise don't do any justice to what I see with my eyes.
Dakle, idući put sam ispunio prijavu i primili su me. Nisam znao što to točno znači biti astronaut: treninzi, simulacije, sve te stvari koje te pripremaju za ovo odbrojavanje: tri, dva, jedan, polijetanje. A 2007. sam u Space Shuttleu "Atlantida" odmicao od planeta, putujući brzinom od 28.165 kilometara na sat. Osam i pol minuta kasnije, glavni motori prestaju raditi i sada plutamo kroz svemir. Odgurnuo sam se i doplutao do prozora te sam mogao vidjeti Karibe. Trebala mi je nova definicija plave da opišem boje koje vidim. Azurna, indigo, mornarsko plava, srednje mornarsko plava, tirkizna ne dočaravaju dovoljno ono što sam vidio.
And my job on this mission was to install this two-billion dollar Columbus laboratory. It was a research laboratory for materials research, for human research. And I reached into the payload bay of the space shuttle, grabbed out this big module, and I used the robotic arm and I attached it to the space station. And the European team have been waiting 10 years for this thing to get installed, so I'm sure everyone in Europe was like, "Leland! Leland! Leland!"
Moj posao u toj misiji bio je da instaliram dvije milijarde dolara vrijedan laboratorij Columbus. To je laboratorij za istraživanje, za istraživanje materijala, za ljudska istraživanja. Posegnuo sam u Space Shuttleov prostor za teret, zgrabio sam jedan veliki modul i koristio robotsku ruku da ga pričvrstim za svemirsku postaju. Europski tim čekao je 10 godina da se ta stvar instalira pa su sigurno svi u Europi navijali: "Leland! Leland! Leland!"
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
And so this moment happened, this was our primary mission objective, it was done. And I had this big sigh of relief. But then, Peggy Whitson, the first female commander, she invited us over to the Russian segment. And the space station's about the size of a football field, with solar panel and trusses and all of these modules. And she says, "Leland, you go get the rehydrated vegetables, we have the meat." So we float over with the bag of vegetables, all rehydrated, and we get there.
Tako se dogodio taj trenutak, to je bio primarni cilj naše misije, bilo je gotovo. Duboko sam odahnuo. No tada, Peggy Whitson, prva žena kao zapovjednik, pozvala nas je do ruskog dijela postaje. A svemirska je postaja veličine nogometnog terena, sa solarnim panelima, rešetkama i svim tim modulima. Onda je rekla: "Lelande, ti odi i uzmi rehidrirano povrće, mi imamo meso." Tako smo plutali s torbom povrća, sve rehidrirano, i otišli smo tamo.
And there's this moment where I get [transported] back to my mother's kitchen. You can smell the beef and barley heating up, you can smell the food, the colors, and there are people there from all around the world. It's like a Benetton commercial, you know, you have African American, Asian American, French, German, Russian, the first female commander, breaking bread at 17,500 miles per hour, going around the planet every 90 minutes, seeing a sunrise and a sunset every 45. And Peggy would say, "Hey, Leland, try some of this," and she'd float it over to my mouth, and I'd catch it and we'd go back and forth. And we're doing all of this while listening to Sade's "Smooth Operator."
Tada se dogodio trenutak koji me vratio u kuhinju moje majke. Možeš namirisati govedinu i ječam kako se krčkaju, možeš namirisati hranu, boje, a tu su svi ti ljudi iz cijelog svijeta. Kao u reklami za Benetton, znate, tu su Afroamerikanac, Azijat, Francuz, Nijemac, Rus, prva žena zapovjednik, koji jedu putujući brzinom od 28.165 kilometara na sat, obilazeći planet svakih 90 minuta, gledajući izlazak i zalazak sunca svakih 45 minuta. Peggy je rekla: "Hej, Lelande, probaj malo ovog," gurnula je hranu prema mojim ustima, uhvatio sam pa smo si naizmjenično slali hranu. Sve smo to radili slušajući pjesmu Sade "Smooth Operator".
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
I mean, this is like blowing my mind, you know.
Mislim, to mi je fascinantno, znate.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
And I float over to the window, and I look down at the planet, and I see all of humanity. And my perspective changes at that moment, because, I'm flying over Lynchburg, Virginia, my home town, and my family's probably breaking bread. And five minutes later, we're flying over Paris, where Leo Eyharts is looking down at his parents, probably having some wine and cheese, and Yuri's looking off to Moscow, and they're probably eating borscht or something else. But we're all having this moment where we see our respective families working together as one civilization, at 17,500 miles per hour.
Doplutao sam do prozora, pogledao dolje prema planetu i vidio cijelo čovječanstvo. Moja se perspektiva tada promijenila, zato što sam letio iznad Lyncburga, mog rodnog mjesta, a moja je obitelj vjerojatno isto jela. Pet minuta kasnije, letjeli smo iznad Pariza, gdje Leo Eyharts gleda dolje svoje roditelje, koji vjerojatno jedu malo sira i vina, a Yuri gleda prema Moskvi, gdje vjerojatno jedu boršč ili nešto slično. Ali svi smo imali taj trenutak kada smo vidjeli svoje obitelji koje zajedno rade kao jedna civilizacija, putujući brzinom od 28.165 kilometara na sat.
My perspective shifted cognitively, it changed me. And when I think about being that little skinny boy, from sometimes racist Lynchburg, Virginia, I would never have had that perspective to think about myself of being an astronaut, if my father hadn't taken us on a journey in this radical craft that we built with our own two hands.
Moja se perspektiva koginitivno promijenila, to me promijenilo. I kada se sjetim da sam bio taj mršavi mali dječak, iz pomalo rasističkog Lynchburga u Viriginiji, nikada ne bih imao tu perspektivu misliti o sebi kao o astronautu, da nas moj otac nije odveo na putovanje u tom radikalnom vozilu koje smo izgradili vlastitim rukama.
When I came home, I realized that perspective is something that we all get and we all have. It's just how far do we open up our blinders to see that shift and that change. And going back to the space station, I think of, you know, Germans and Russians fighting Americans. We have these people living and working together. White folks, black folks, Russian folks, French folks, you know. All these different people coexisting in harmony as one race. And I think about the colors that I saw, the design of the modules, the way that things fit together, the way that it made us a community, our home.
Kada sam došao kući, shvatio sam da je ta perspektiva nešto što svi dobijemo i svi imamo. Pitanje je samo koliko ćemo široko razmaknuti povez da vidimo tu promjenu. A što se tiče svemirske postaje, mislim na, znate, Nijemce i Ruse koji se bore protiv Amerikanaca. Na jednom su mjestu ljudi koji žive i rade zajedno. Bijelci, crnci, Rusi, Francuzi, znate. Svi ti drukčiji ljudi koji žive u harmoniji kao jedna rasa. Mislim i o bojama koje sam vidio, o dizajnu modula, načinu na koji se stvari poklapaju, načinu zbog kojeg smo bili zajednica, stvorili dom.
And so when I look up to space now, and I have this newfound perspective on the space station going overhead and looking there, and then looking back at my community and seeing the people that I'm living and working with, and coexisting with, I think it's something that we all can do now, especially in these times, to make sure that we have the right perspective.
Tako da kada sad pogledam gore u svemir, uz svoju novu perspektivu i pogledam svemirsku postaju koja je gore, gledajući u nju te potom gledajući moju zajednicu i vidim ljude s kojima radim i živim, i u suživotu sam s njima, mislim da je to nešto što sada svi možemo, pogotovo sada, da budemo sigurni da imamo pravu perspektivu.
Thank you.
Hvala vam.
(Applause)
(Pljesak)
Chee Pearlman: If you don't mind, could I just chat with you for a minute, because they're going to set up some things here. And I get to have you all to myself, OK.
Chee Pearlaman: Ako Vam ne smeta, možemo li kratko popričati? Jer oni će postaviti neke stvari ovdje. A ja Vas imam samo za sebe.
Leland Melvin: Alright.
Leland Melvin: U redu.
CP: You guys don't get to hear this. So I have to tell you that in my family, we watch a lot of space movies about astronauts and stuff like that. I can't tell you why, but we do.
CP: Vi nećete imati priliku ovo čuti. Dakle, moram Vam reći da u mojoj obitelji gledamo puno filmova o svemiru, o astronautima i takvim stvarima. Ne mogu Vam reći zašto, ali to radimo.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
The thing that I wanted to ask you, though, is that we were seeing this movie the other day, and it was about one of the astronauts, one of your colleagues, and before he went up into space, they actually wrote an obituary, NASA wrote an obituary for him. And I was like, is that normal? And is that part of the job? Do you think about that peril that you're putting yourself in as you go into space?
Stvar koju Vas želim pitati, doduše, je da smo gledali jedan film prije nekog vremena, radilo se o jednom astronautu, jednom od vaših kolega, i prije nego što je otišao na misiju u svemir, napisali su osmrtnicu, NASA je napisala osmrtnicu za njega. A mene je zanimalo, je li to normalno? Je li to dio posla? Razmišljate li o opasnosti u koju se dovodite dok idete u svemir?
LM: Yeah. So, I don't remember anyone writing my obituary, maybe that was an Apollo-day thing. But I do know that in the 135 shuttle flights that we've had, the shuttle that I flew on, we had two accidents that killed everyone on that mission. And we all know the perils and the risks that go along with this, but we're doing something that's much bigger than ourselves, and helping advance civilization, so the risk is worth the reward. And we all feel that way when we get into that vehicle ans strap into those million pounds of rocket fuel and go up to space.
LM: Da. Pa ne sjećam se da je netko napisao moju osmrtnicu, možda su to radili u doba Apollo misija. Ali znam da je tijekom 135 Space Shuttle letova koje smo imali, shuttle kojim sam ja letio, imali smo dvije nesreće koje su gotovo ubile sve na toj misiji. Svi mi znamo opasnosti i rizike koji idu uz ovo, ali mi radimo nešto što je puno veće od nas samih i pomažemo napredak civilizacije, tako da je rizik vrijedan nagrade. Svi se osjećamo tako kada ulazimo u tu letjelicu i zavežemo se u te milijune kilograma raketnog goriva i odemo u svemir.
CP: Yeah, I've only seen the Hollywood version -- it looks pretty terrifying, I have to tell you.
CP: Da, ja sam samo vidjela hollywoodsku verziju, izgleda poprilično zastrašujuće, moram priznati.
LM: You should go.
LM: Trebali biste probati.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
CP: Yeah, my husband's told me that a few times.
CP: Da baš, moj mi je muž to rekao nekoliko puta.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
LM: One-way trip or two-way?
LM: Put u jednom smjeru ili s povratkom?
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
CP: That’s a bit of a debate in our house.
CP: To je jedna od debata u našem domu.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
I wanted to, if I may ... You did touch on something that was very powerful and difficult, which is, you spoke about this incident that had happened to you when you were five years old, and that you were raped. And I just think that for you to be able to say those things, you know, on the TED stage, to be able to talk about that at all, is pretty fearless. And I wanted to get a sense from you, is that something that you think is important for you to share that now, to speak about it?
Željela sam, ako smijem... Spomenuli ste nešto što je jako moćno i teško, govorili ste o tom incidentu koji Vam se dogodio kada ste imali pet godina, a to je da ste bili silovani. A ja jednostavno mislim, činjenica da možete reći te stvari, znate, na TED pozornici, da uopće možete govoriti o tome, je poprilično neustrašivo. I željela sam Vas pitati, mislite li da je to nešto što je važno da podijelite, da govorite o tome?
LM: It's so important, especially for men, to talk about things that have happened, because we've been trained and told by our society that we have to be so tough and so hard and we can't tell of things that are happening to us. But I've had so many men contact me and tell me that, "You came through that, you got over that, I'm going to get over my alcoholism," and these things that are going on in them, because of what happened to them. And so we must share these stories, this is part of storytelling, to heal us and to make us whole as a community.
LM: To je jako važno, posebno za muškarce, da razgovaramo o tim događajima, zato što smo istrenirani i naše nam društvo govori da moramo biti čvrsti i snažni i da ne možemo govoriti o stvarima koje nam se događaju. Ali toliko mi se muškaraca javilo i reklo mi, "Prošao si kroz to, prebolio si to, ja ću izliječiti svoj alkoholizam." I te stvari koje se događaju u njima, zbog toga što se dogodilo njima. I zato moramo dijeliti te priče, to je zadatak pripovijedanja, da nas izliječi i učini od nas jednu jedinstvenu zajednicu.
CP: That's wonderful.
CP: To je predivno.
(Applause)
(Pljesak)
And you know, quite honestly, you spoke about perspective shift, and that is a shift that I think we've been very slow to accept and to be able to speak about that, so we thank you for that. We thank you for being the amazing astronaut that you are, and thank you for coming to the TED stage, Leland.
I znate, sasvim iskreno, govorili ste o promjeni perspektive, mislim da je to promjena koju jako sporo prihvaćamo, a Vi ste uspjeli govoriti o tome, zato Vam zahvaljujemo. Zahvaljujemo Vam što ste takav nevjerojatan astronaut i hvala Vam što ste došli na TED pozornicu, Lelande.
LM: Thank you so much, Chee.
LM: Hvala Vam puno, Chee.
(Applause)