I was on a date, just about to eat dinner, and I hear a growling sound. And I look at the guy, he says to me, "That's your stomach, not mine."
我在约会,正要吃晚饭, 然后我听到了咆哮声。 我看着那个人, 他对我说:“那是你的 胃,不是我的。”
(Laughs)
(笑)
How do I not recognize the sounds coming from my own body, not to mention my own voice?
我怎么认不出来自我 自己身体的声音呢, 更何况是我自己的声音?
I love the sound of my voice on a microphone, but it didn't start out that way. When I was younger, I was in love with other people's voices. And like so many of us, the first time I ever heard my voice on a recording, I hated it.
我喜欢我在在麦克风上的声音, 但它不是一开始就这样。 当我年轻的时候, 我爱上了别人的声音。 和我们许多人一样, 我第一次听到 我在录音中的声音的时候, 我讨厌它。
I was 10 years old when my mother bought me a Panasonic cassette recorder with a pack of Memorex cassette tapes for Christmas. See, singing on tape was my version of bedroom musical play, something that girls do all around the world, and it's really gendered. Left alone with our devices, alone in a room, girls play. Singing, listening to music, dancing. So with a gift in hand, the very next morning, the first thing I did was record my voice. And when I played the tape back, I was shocked. It didn't sound anything like me. There was a huge gap between what I thought I sounded like and what the tape was telling me. And it was traumatic because I didn't recognize me.
我妈妈在圣诞节给我买 一个松下盒式录音机 和一包 Memorex 的盒式磁带的时候我才 10 岁。 看,在磁带上唱歌是我版本的 卧室音乐剧, 世界各地的女孩子都会做的事, 而且它真的是性别化的。 与我们的设备独处, 一个人在房间里,女孩们会玩。 唱歌、听音乐、跳舞。 所以手里拿着礼物, 第二天早上, 我做的第一件事就是录下我的声音。 当我播放磁带时, 我很震惊。 这听起来一点也不像我。 我以为我听起来的和磁带告诉我的 之间有很大的差距。 这是创伤性的 因为我没有认出来我。
I think we all know that feeling. But some of us are emancipated from the doubt triggered by technology, and some of us are not. So I stuck to dancing in the mirror and lip synching, falling in love with other people's voices instead of my own.
我想我们都知道那种感觉。 但我们中的一些人 从科技引发的疑惑中解放了, 而我们中的一些人没有。 所以我坚持对着镜子跳舞和假唱, 爱上别人的声音而不是我自己的。
Now I am a digital ethnomusicologist. I study Black tween girls, particularly the unintended consequences of their intimate bedroom musical play. On today's mobile apps, Black girls record and upload the most viral dances on the internet. But the songs that mute their voices and sound pornographic are overwhelmingly male. For example, the song "Booty Hopscotch" entices very young girls to record themselves while a male ventriloquist grooms them to "Keep that ass jumpin', Keep that ass jumpin'." Girls say they don't listen to the lyrics, but when asked, they can sing every word with no concern for the consequences.
现在我是一名数字民族音乐学家。 我研究黑人补间女孩, 特别是她们私密卧室音乐剧的 意外后果。 在今天的移动应用程序上, 黑人女孩会记录和上传 互联网上最流行的舞蹈。 但是那些歌曲会把他们 的声音静音并听起来 色情的绝大多数是男性的。 例如,歌曲 “臀部跳房子” 吸引了非常年轻的女孩来记录自己 而男性口技达人会训练他们 “让那个屁股跳起来, 让那个屁股跳起来。” 女生说她们不会听 歌词,但当被问到时, 他们可以不关心后果 的唱出每一个字。
Before YouTube, before WorldstarHipHop, the Black YouTube, on the playground and in the bedroom, the voices that Black girls heard in their own musical play were predominately their own. But these days, online Black girls are drowning in the sounds of musical mansplaining while bouncing ther booty to the beats and rhymes of rap that tops the Billboard and YouTube charts. Songs like, "Hands up, get low. hands up, get low, hands up," tell them what to do and how to do it. Curiously, the hook for that song may have come, may have been appropriated from a Black girls' hand-clapping game called "Jig-a-low." Jig-a-low is a contraction, “jig” meaning to dance and “a-low”, well, to get down. "Jig-a-low, jig-jig-a-low, I do my thing, yeah, on the video screen. Yeah, well, my hands up high, my feet down low. And this the way we jig-a-low. Hands up high, my feet down low. And this the way we jig-a-low.”
在 YouTube 之前, 在 WorldstarHipHop 之前, Black YouTube, 在操场上和卧室里, 黑人女孩在他们自己的 音乐剧中听到的声音, 主要是他们自己的。 但是现如今黑人女孩在网上正在淹没 在音乐曼斯普林的声音中, 跟着登上公告牌榜首 和 YouTube 排行榜的 说唱节奏和韵律,弹跳她们的臀部。 像 “举起手来,放低点。举起手, 放低点,举起手来” 这样的歌 告诉他们该做什么以及怎么做。 奇怪的是,这首歌的 hook 可能已经有了,可能是从一个名叫 “Jig-a-low” 的黑人女孩 拍手游戏中挪用的。 Jig-a-low 是缩略语, “jig” 的意思是跳舞 和 “a-low”,好吧,是下来。 “Jig-a-low, jig-jig-a-low, 我做我的事,是的,在视频屏幕上。 是的,我的双手高高举起, 我的脚放低了。 这就是我们 jig-a-low 的方式。 双手高高举起,我的脚放低。 这就是我们 jig-a-low 的方式。”
Girls across the gender spectrum, who love to twerk, which is a culturally appropriate and sophisticated style of dance found throughout the African and Afro-Latina diaspora, are being enticed by sounds that are produced, engineered and written 90 percent of the time by men who are enticing and taking advantage of girls who love to dance and treating them like adults in their intimate bedroom musical play. How do I know? For seven years, I've been studying a set of 650 bedrooms twerking videos by Black girls. They were uploaded to YouTube between 2006 and 2014. Over 1,000 girls from all around the world selected 200 twerk songs and only nine voices of women, including Nicki Minaj, Beyoncé, Ciara and one indie artist named Katie Got Bandz.
喜欢扭臀的女孩们, 它是在整个非洲 和非裔拉丁侨民都有的, 在文化中适当的精致的舞蹈风格, 90% 的情况是被男人 生产、设计和编写的声音所吸引的, 他们把它用来诱惑 和利用喜欢跳舞的女孩, 并在他们私密的卧室音乐剧中, 像对待成年人一样对待她们 我为什么会知道呢? 七年来, 我一直在研究一套 650 个 黑人女孩的卧室扭臀视频。 它们是在 2006 年至 2014 年间 被上传到 YouTube 的。 来自世界各地的 1000 多名女孩 选择了 200 首扭臀歌曲, 只有 9 首是女性的声音, 包括妮琪·米娜、碧昂丝、席亚拉 和一位名叫名叫凯蒂有班兹 的独立艺术家。
So what's behind all this? While girls are twerking, feeling themselves, feeling empowered, arguably the oldest technology in our human evolution, music, is taking over. Beyond our conscious thought, music lowers our threshold of pain while it rewards us with the feeling of social bonding and intimacy. That's why we go to concerts, that's why we crave that feeling even when we're alone, that's why music is self-soothing. And it is. It's a whole mood. But that mood is grooming younger and younger girls to tolerate psychological violence in dating situations and in their own intimate bedroom musical play.
那么这一切的背后是什么? 当女孩们在扭动时, 感觉到自己,感觉被赋予力量, 可以说是在我们人类 的进化中最古老的技术, 音乐正在接管。 在我们有意识的思想之外, 音乐降低了我们的痛苦阈值, 同时它奖励了我们 社会联系和亲密关系的感觉。 这就是我们去音乐会的原因, 这就是即使我们一个人 也渴望那种感觉的原因, 这就是音乐能够自我抚慰的原因。 它是的。 它是一个完整的心情。 但这种心情正在修饰 越来越年轻的女孩忍受 在约会场合和 在她们的卧室音乐剧的心理暴力。
Girls repeatedly do what they're repeatedly exposed to. Left to their own devices, music as technology gives patriarchy and anti-Blackness a head start. Faced with doubt about my own voice when I was ten, the tendency to think that the situation was about me, about feeling insecure, that was the tendency, not the situation. The role technology plays gets lost. Being best friends with my own voice could have been my first intimate relationship. If very young girls were surrounded by the voices of Black female voices, chances are they'd assign value to their own. Bedroom musical play could be the first time a girl tunes in to her own internal signals, self-regulates it, and learns to say "Yes!" as well as, "Nope, not today." But online, bedroom musical play, like listening to your gut or your stomach, well, it's not a solo act. Stereotypes and stigmas fed by algorithms and audiences are silencing us. But if Black girls produced their own twerk songs and preferred female musicians, well, they could break the internet in music and tech. But that revolution in sound can only begin if they learn to like the voice on their own Memorex tape.
女孩反复做他们反复接触的东西。 任凭他们自己的设备, 音乐作为技术赋予父权制 和反黑度抢先一步。 在十岁时面对对自己声音的怀疑, 倾向于思考是因为我, 关于感到不安, 这是趋势,而不是情况。 技术所扮演的角色迷失了。 跟我自己的声音成为最好的朋友 可能是我的第一个亲密关系。 如果非常年轻的女孩被 黑人女声的声音包围的话, 他们可能会分配价值给自己的。 卧室音乐剧可能是一个女孩 第一次收听自己的内部信号, 自我调节它, 并学会说 “是的!” 以及 “不,不是今天”。 但在网上,卧室音乐剧, 就像听你的直觉或者你的胃, 好吧,这不是一个单独的行为。 算法和观众带来的刻板印象和污名 正在让我们沉默。 但如果黑人女孩生产 他们自己的扭臀歌曲 和喜欢的女性音乐家, 好吧,他们可以在音乐和 科技方面破坏互联网。 但是声音的革命只有在学会喜欢 他们自己的 Memorex 磁带上 的声音的时候才能开始。
Thank you.
谢谢。
(Applause)
(掌声)