So what does it mean to be a woman? We all have XX chromosomes, right? Actually, that's not true. Some women are mosaics. They have a mix of chromosome types with X, with XY or with XXX. If it's not just about our chromosomes, then what is being a woman about? Being feminine? Getting married? Having kids? You don't have to look far to find fantastic exceptions to these rules, but we all share something that makes us women. Maybe that something is in our brains.
Dakle, šta znači biti žena? Svi imamo hromozome XX, zar ne? Zapravo, to nije tačno. Neke žene su mozaici. Imaju mešavinu tipova hromozoma sa X, XY ili XXX. Ako se ne radi samo o našim hromozima, šta onda znači biti žena? Biti ženstvena? Biti venčana? Imati decu? Ne moram da tražim puno da bih našla fantastične izuzetke od ovih pravila, ali svi delimo nešto što nas čini ženama. Možda je to nešto u našim mozgovima.
You might have heard theories from last century about how men are better at math than women because they have bigger brains. These theories have been debunked. The average man has a brain about three times smaller than the average elephant, but that doesn't mean the average man is three times dumber than an elephant ... or does it?
Možda ste čuli teorije iz prošlog veka kako su muškarci bolji u matematici od žena jer imaju veće mozgove. Ove teorije su opovrgnute. Prosečan muškarac ima mozak tri puta manji od prosečnog slona, ali to ne znači da je prosečan muškarac tri puta gluplji od slona... ili znači?
(Laughter)
(Smeh)
There's a new wave of female neuroscientists that are finding important differences between female and male brains in neuron connectivity, in brain structure, in brain activity. They're finding that the brain is like a patchwork mosaic -- a mixture. Women have mostly female patches and a few male patches.
Postoji novi talas neuronaučnica koje pronalaze važne razlike između ženskog i muškog mozga u povezanosti neurona, u strukturi mozga, u aktivnosti mozga. Otkrile su da je mozak kao krpljeni mozaik, mešavina. Žene imaju uglavnom ženske zakrpe, a malo muških zakrpa.
With all this new data, what does it mean to be a woman? This is something that I've been thinking about almost my entire life. When people learn that I'm a woman who happens to be transgender, they always ask, "How do you know you're a woman?" As a scientist, I'm searching for a biological basis of gender. I want to understand what makes me me. New discoveries at the front edge of science are shedding light on the biomarkers that define gender. My colleagues and I in genetics, neuroscience, physiology and psychology, we're trying to figure out exactly how gender works. These vastly different fields share a common connection -- epigenetics. In epigenetics, we're studying how DNA activity can actually radically and permanently change, even though the sequence stays the same.
Sa svim ovim novim podacima, šta znači biti žena? Ovo je nešto o čemu sam mislila maltene ceo svoj život. Kad ljudi saznaju da sam žena, koja je usput transrodna osoba, uvek pitaju: „Kako znaš da si žena?" Kao naučnica tragam za biološkom osnovom pola. Želim da razumem zbog čega sam ja ono što jesam. Nova otkrića u vrhu nauke objašnjavaju biomarkere koji definišu pol. Moje kolege i ja u genetici, neuronaukama, fiziologiji i psihologiji pokušavamo da otkrijemo kako pol tačno funkcioniše. Ova veoma različita polja dele zajedničku vezu, epigenetiku. U epigenetici proučavamo kako se aktivnost DNK može zapravo radikalno i trajno promeniti, iako niz ostaje isti.
DNA is the long, string-like molecule that winds up inside our cells. There's so much DNA that it actually gets tangled into these knot-like things -- we'll just call them knots. So external factors change how those DNA knots are formed. You can think of it like this: inside our cells, there's different contraptions building things, connecting circuits, doing all the things they need to make life happen. Here's one that's sort of reading the DNA and making RNA. And then this one is carrying a huge sac of neurotransmitters from one end of the brain cell to the other. Don't they get hazard pay for this kind of work?
DNK je dugačak molekul popun vrpce koji se namotava unutar naših ćelija. Postoji toliko DNK da se zapravo zapetljava u nešto poput čvorova - zvaćemo ih čvorovi. Dakle, spoljašnji faktori menjaju to kako se ti DNK čvorovi formiraju. Možete da zamislite to na ovaj način: unutar naših ćelija postoje različite naprave koji stvaraju stvari, povezuju procese i rade sve stvari koje su potrebne da bi se desio život. Evo ga jedan koji čita DNK i pravi RNK. Onda ovaj nosi veliku kesu neurotransmitera od jednog kraja ćelije mozga do drugog. Zar ne zaslužuju ogromnu platu za ovakav posao?
(Laughter)
(Smeh)
This one is an entire molecular factory -- some say it's the secret to life. It's call the ribosome. I've been studying this since 2001.
Ovaj ovde je čitava fabrika molekula, neki kažu da je to tajna života. Zove se ribozom. Proučavam ovo od 2001. godine.
One of the stunning things about our cells is that the components inside them are actually biodegradable. They dissolve, and then they're rebuilt each day, kind of like a traveling carnival where the rides are taken down and then rebuilt every single day. A big difference between our cells and the traveling carnival is that in the carnival, there are skilled craftsmen that rebuild the rides each day. In our cells, there are no such skilled craftsmen, only dumb builder machines that build whatever's written in the plans, no matter what those plans say. Those plans are the DNA. The instructions for every nook and cranny inside our cells.
Jedna divna stvar u vezi sa našim ćelijama je ta što su sastavni delovi unutar njih zapravo biorazgradivi. Oni se rastvaraju i ponovo se izgrađuju svakog dana, poput putujućeg karnevala gde se mašine rasklapaju, a onda ponovo sklapaju svakog dana. Velika razlika između naših ćelija i putujućeg karnevala je ta što na karnevalu postoje vešti majstori koji ponovo grade mašine svaki dan. U našim ćelijama ne postoje takvi vešti majstori, samo neme mašine za izgradnju koje grade šta god da je napisano u planovima, bez obzira na to šta ti planovi kažu. Ti planovi su DNK. Uputstva za svaki ćošak i pukotinu unutar naših ćelija.
If everything in, say, our brain cells dissolves almost every day, then how can the brain remember anything past one day? That's where DNA comes in. DNA is one of the those things that does not dissolve. But for DNA to remember that something happened, it has to change somehow. We know the change can't be in the sequence; if it changed sequence all the time, then we might be growing like, a new ear or a new eyeball every single day.
Ako se sve u, recimo, našim ćelijama mozga rastavlja skoro svakog dana, kako onda mozak može da zapamti bilo šta od prošlog dana? Tada DNK nastupa. DNK je jedna od onih stvari koje se ne rastavljaju. Ali da bi DNK zapamtila da se nešto desilo, mora da se promeni nekako. Znamo da promena ne može da se desi u nizu; da menja nizove sve vreme, možda bi nam možda izraslo novo uvo, ili nova očna jabučica svakog dana.
(Laughter)
(Smeh)
So, instead it changes shape, and that's where those DNA knots come in. You can think of them like DNA memory. When something big in our life happens, like a traumatic childhood event, stress hormones flood our brain. The stress hormones don't affect the sequence of DNA, but they do change the shape. They affect that part of DNA with the instructions for molecular machines that reduce stress. That piece of DNA gets wound up into a knot, and now the dumb builder machines can't read the plans they need to build the machines that reduce stress. That's a mouthful, but it's what's happening on the microscale. On the macroscale, you practically lose the ability to deal with stress, and that's bad. And that's how DNA can remember what happens in the past.
Umesto toga menja oblik, a tada oni čvorovi DNK nastupaju. Možete razmišljati o njima kao o memoriji DNK. Kad se nešto veliko desi u našim životima, poput traumatičnog događaja iz detinjstva, hormoni stresa preplavljuju naš mozak. Hormoni stresa ne deluju na niz DNK, ali menjaju oblik. Deluju na taj deo DNK sa upustvima za molekularne mašine koje umanjuju stres. Taj deo DNK biva zamotan u čvor, pa mašina za izgradnju ne može da čita planove koji su joj potrebni da bi izgradila naprave koje smanjuju stres. Zvuči složeno, ali to je ono što se dešava na mikro nivou. Na makro nivou, praktično gubite sposobnost da se nosite sa stresom, a to je loše. Na taj način DNK može da zapamti šta se desilo u prošlosti.
This is what I think was happening to me when I first started my gender transition. I knew I was a woman on the inside, and I wore women's clothes on the outside, but everyone saw me as a man in a dress. I felt like no matter how many things I try, no one would ever really see me as a woman. In science, your credibility is everything, and people were snickering in the hallways, giving me stares, looks of disgust -- afraid to be near me. I remember my first big talk after transition. It was in Italy. I'd given prestigious talks before, but this one, I was terrified. I looked out into the audience, and the whispers started -- the stares, the smirks, the chuckles. To this day, I still have social anxiety around my experience eight years ago. I lost hope. Don't worry, I've had therapy so I'm OK -- I'm OK now.
Ovo je ono što mislim da se dešavalo meni kad sam započela menjanje pola. Znala sam da sam žena iznutra, i nosila sam žensku odeću spolja, ali svi su me videli kao muškarca u haljini. Osećala sam se kao da, bez obzira koliko stvari da pokušam, niko me nikada neće zaista videti kao ženu. U nauci, kredibilitet je sve, a ljudi su se kikotali u hodnicima, buljili u mene, zgađenim pogledima, u strahu da budu oko mene. Sećam se mog prvog velikog govora posle promene. Bilo je to u Italiji. Držala sam prestižne govore i ranije, ali za ovaj sam bila uplašena. Gledala sam u publiku i šapati su krenuli, zurenja, podla smeškanja, cerekanja. I dan-danas sam nervozna među ljudima zbog iskustva od pre osam godina. Izgubila sam nadu. Ne brinite. Bila sam na terapiji, tako da sam okej, u redu sam sada.
(Laughter)
(Smeh)
(Cheers)
(Ovacije)
(Applause)
(Aplauz)
But I felt enough is enough: I'm a scientist, I have a doctorate in astrophysics, I've published in the top journals, in wave-particle interactions, space physics, nucleic acid biochemistry. I've actually been trained to get to the bottom of things, so --
Ali što je dosta, dosta je, naučnica sam, imam doktorat iz astrofizike, objavljivala sam radove u najboljim časopisima, o interakciji između talasa i čestica, fizici svemira, biohemiji nukleinske kiseline. Zapravo sam obučena da otkrijem stvari koje su sakrivene.
(Laughter)
(Smeh)
I went online --
Otišla sam na internet -
(Applause)
(Aplauz)
So I went online, and I found fascinating research papers. I learned that these DNA knot things are not always bad. Actually, the knotting and unknotting -- it's like a complicated computer language. It programs our bodies with exquisite precision.
Dakle, otišla sam na internet i našla sam fascinantan istraživački rad. Naučila sam da ti čvorovi DNK nisu uvek loši. Zapravo, vezivanje i odvezivanje je kao komplikovan programski jezik. Programira naša tela sa neverovatnom preciznošću.
So when we get pregnant, our fertilized eggs grow into newborn babies. This process requires thousands of DNA decisions to happen. Should an embryo cell become a blood cell? A heart cell? A brain cell? And the decisions happen at different times during pregnancy. Some in the first trimester, some in the second trimester and some in the third trimester. To truly understand DNA decision-making, we need to see the process of knot formation in atomic detail. Even the most powerful microscopes can't see this. What if we tried to simulate these on a computer? For that we'd need a million computers to do that. That's exactly what we have at Los Alamos Labs -- a million computers connected in a giant warehouse.
Kad zatrudnimo, naša oplođena jaja prerastu u bebe. Ovaj proces zahteva hiljade odluka DNK da bi se desio. Treba li ćelija embriona da postane ćelija krvi? Ćelija srca? Ćelija mozga? A odluke se dešavaju u različitim trenucima tokom trudnoće. Neke u prvom tromesečju, neke u drugom tromesečju, a neke u trećem tromesečju. Da bismo stvarno razumeli kako DNK donosi odluke, moramo da vidimo proces formiranja čvorova na nivou atoma. Čak i najmoćniji mikroskopi to ne mogu da vide. Šta ako bismo pokušali da to simuliramo na računaru? Za to bi nam trebalo milion računara. To je tačno ono što imamo u laboratorijama u Los Alamosu, milion računara povezanih u ogromnom skladištu.
So here we're showing the DNA making up an entire gene folded into very specific shapes of knots. For the first time, my team has simulated an entire gene of DNA -- the largest biomolecular simulation performed to date. For the first time, we're beginning to understand the unsolved problem of how hormones trigger the formation of these knots.
Ovde pokazujemo kako DNK pravi čitave gene sklopljenje u specifične oblike čvorova. Po prvi put, moj tim je simulirao čitav gen DNK, što je najveća biomolekularna simulacija izvršena do današnjeg dana. Po prvi put počinjemo da razumemo nerešen problem kako hormoni aktiviraju formacije ovih čvorova.
DNA knot formation can be seen beautifully in calico cats. The decision between orange and black happens early on in the womb, so that orange-and-black patchy pattern, it's an exact readout of what happened when that cat was just a tiny little kitten embryo inside her mom's womb. And the patchy pattern actually happens in our brains and in cancer. It's directly related to intellectual disability and breast cancer.
Formacija čvorova DNK se može lepo videti kod mačaka kaliko. Odluka između narandžaste i crne se dešava rano, u stomaku, tako da su te narandžasto-crne šare tačno isčitavanje onoga što se desilo kad je ta mačka još bila sićušni mačiji embrion unutar majčinog stomaka. A šabloni šara se zapravo dešavaju i u našim mozgovima i kod raka. Direktno su u vezi sa intelektualnom invalidnošću i rakom dojke.
These DNA decisions also happen in other parts of the body. It turns out that the precursor genitals transform into either female or male during the first trimester of pregnancy. The precursor brains, on the other hand, transform into female or male during the second trimester of pregnancy. So the current working model is that a unique mix in my mom's womb caused the precursor genitals to transform one way, but the precursor brain to transform the other way.
Ove odluke DNK se takođe dešavaju i u drugim delovima tela. Ispostavilo se da se preteča genitalija transformiše u ili ženske ili muške tokom prvog tromesečja trudnoće. Preteča mozga, s druge strane, se transformiše u ženski ili muški tokom drugog tromesečja trudnoće. Dakle, trenutni radni model je da je jedinstvena mešavina u stomaku moje majke izazvala da se preteča genitalija tranformiše na jedan način, a da se preteča mozga transformiše na drugi način.
Most of epigenetic research has really focused on stress, anxiety, depression -- kind of a downer, kind of bad things.
Većina epigenetskih istraživanja se zapravo fokusirala na stres, anksioznost i depresiju, baš smor stvari, na loše stvari.
(Laughter)
(Smeh)
But nowadays -- the latest stuff -- people are looking at relaxation. Can that have a positive effect on your DNA? Right now we're missing key data from mice models. We know that mice relax, but could they meditate like the Dalai Lama? Achieve enlightenment? Could they move stones with their mind like Jedi Master Yoda?
Ali danas - najnoviji trendovi - ljudi ispituju relaksaciju. Može li to imati pozitivan efekat na vaš DNK? Sada nam fale ključni podaci iz modela sa miševima. Znamo da se miševi opuštaju, ali da li bi mogli da meditiraju kao Dalaj Lama? Da dostignu prosvetljenje? Da li bi mogli da pomeraju kamenje svojim umom kao Džedaj master Joda?
(Yoda voice): Hm, a Jedi mouse must feel the force flow, hm.
(Jodin glas) Hm, miš Džedaj mora da oseti tok sile, hm.
(Laughter)
(Smeh)
(Applause)
(Aplauz)
I wonder if the support I've had since that talk back in Italy has tried to unwind my DNA. Having a great circle of friends, supportive parents and being in a loving relationship has actually given me strength and hope to help others. At work I wear a rainbow bracelet. Sometimes it raises eyebrows, but it also raises awareness. There's so many transgender people -- especially women of color -- that are just one demeaning comment away from taking their own lives. Forty percent of us attempt suicide. If you're listening and you feel like you have no other option, try to call a friend, go online or try to get in a support group. If you're a woman who's not transgender but you know pain of isolation, of sexual assault -- reach out.
Pitam se da li je podrška koju sam imala nakon tog govora u Italiji pokušala da odmota moj DNK. To što imam super krug prijatelja, roditelje koji me podržavaju, i to što sam u vezi u kojoj ima puno ljubavi mi je zapravo dalo snage i nade da pomognem drugima. Na poslu nosim narukvicu u duginim bojama. Nekad se ljudi mršte, ali pored obrva se podiže i svesnost. Postoji toliko transrodnih osoba, posebno žena druge boje kože, koje samo jedan ponižavajući komentar deli od oduzimanja sopstvenog života. Nas 40% pokuša da počini samoubistvo. Ako slušate i ako se osećate kao da nemate drugu opciju, probajte da pozovete prijatelja, idite na internet, ili pokušajte da se uključite u neku grupu za podršku. Ako ste žena koja nije transrodna, ali poznat vam je bol izolacije, seksualnog napada, potražite pomoć.
So what does it mean to be a woman? The latest research is showing that female and male brains do develop differently in the womb, possibly giving us females this innate sense of being a woman. On the other hand, maybe it's our shared sense of commonality that makes us women. We come in so many different shapes and sizes that asking what it means to be a woman may not be the right question. It's like asking a calico cat what it means to be a calico cat. Maybe becoming a woman means accepting ourselves for who we really are and acknowledging the same in each other.
Dakle, šta znači biti žena? Najnovije istraživanje pokazuje da se ženski i muški mozak razvijaju drugačije u stomaku, verovatno dajući nama ženama urođen osećaj kako da budemo žena. Sa druge strane, možda je ono što nas čini ženama naš osećaj zajedništva. Ima nas u toliko različitih oblika i veličina, da pitanje šta nas čini ženama možda nije dobro pitanje. Kao da pitate mačku kaliko šta znači biti mačka kaliko. Možda postati žena znači prihvatanje sebe samih kakve jesmo i uvažavanje tog istog u drugima.
I see you. And you've just seen me.
Vidim vas. A vi ste upravo videli mene.
(Applause and cheers)
(Aplauz i ovacije)