You all know this story. In the summer of 1950, Enrico Fermi, the Italian-American physicist and atomic-pile builder, went to lunch at Los Alamos National Laboratory and joined some colleagues there, and asked them a question: "Where is everybody?" This confused his colleagues, obviously, because they were sitting right there with him. And then he had to clarify that he wasn't talking about them. He was talking about the space aliens.
Svi znate ovu priču. U ljeto 1950., Enrico Fermi, fizičar talijansko-američkog podrijetla i konstruktor atomske hrpe, je otišao na ručak u Los Alamos nacionalni laboratorij i tamo se pridružio nekolicini kolega, i upitao ih: "Gdje su svi?" To je, očito, zbunilo njegove kolege, jer su sjedili tamo s njim. I onda je morao pojasniti da nije pričao o njima. Pričao je o svemircima.
You see, this was only a few years after the supposed flying saucer crash at Roswell, New Mexico. And even though that turned out to be nothing, nothing at all -- (Laughter) -- merely a downed weather balloon piloted by small hairless men with slits for mouths ... Still, America had gone saucer-mad, even famous scientists who were eating lunch. Fermi's reasoning, if I may paraphrase badly, is that the universe is so vast that it stands to reason, there should be other intelligent life out there. And the universe is so old that unless we were the very first civilization ever to evolve, we should have some evidence of their existence by now. And yet, to the best of our knowledge, we are alone.
Vidite, to je bilo samo par godina nakon navodne nesreće letećeg tanjura kod Roswell-a, Novi Meksiko. Iako se ispostavilo da to nije bilo ništa, ništa uopće -- (Smijeh) tek oboreni prognostički balon navođen od strane malih ćelavih ljudi s prorezima kao ustima. Ipak, Amerika je poludjela za tanjurom, čak i poznati znanstvenici koji su ručali. Fermijevo prosuđivanje, ako smijem loše parafrazirati, jest da je svemir toliko prostran da vrijedi razmišljati kako bi tamo trebali postojati drugi inteligentni oblici života. A svemir je toliko star da osim, da osim ako smo mi prva civilizacija koja se razvila, trebali bi do sada imati neke dokaze o njihovom postojanju. A još uvijek, koliko znamo, mi smo sami.
"Where is everybody?" asked Fermi, and his colleagues had no answer. Fermi then went on with the same blunt logic to disprove fairies, Sasquatch, God, the possibility of love -- and thereafter, as you know, Enrico Fermi ate alone. (Laughter) Now, I am not a scientist. I have never built an atomic pile. Although, I might argue that, technically, every pile is atomic.
"Gdje su svi?" pitao je Fermi, a njegove kolege nisu imali odgovor. Fermi je nastavio s istom zatupljujućom logikom kako bi pobio postojanje vila, Sasquatch-a, Boga, mogućnosti ljubavi - i nakon toga, kao što znate, Enrico Fermi je jeo sam. (Smijeh) Sada, ja nisam znanstvenik. i nikada nisam sagradio atomsku hrpu. Iako, mogao bih tvrditi kako je, tehnički gledano, svaka hrpa atomska.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
However, with respect, I might point out two possibilities that Enrico Fermi perhaps did not consider. One is that the aliens might be very far away. Perhaps, I dare say, even on other planets. The other possibility -- (Laughter) -- is, perhaps, Enrico Fermi himself was an alien.
Kako bilo, uz poštovanje, mogao bih istaknuti dvije mogućnosti koje Enrico Fermi možda i nije uzeo u obzir. Jedna je kako bi izvanzemaljci mogli biti jako daleko. Možda, usudit ću se reći, čak i na drugim planetima. Druga mogućnost - (Smijeh) jest, možda, da je Enrico Fermi bio izvanzemaljac.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
Think about it. Isn't it a little convenient that in the midst of the World War, out of nowhere, suddenly an Italian scientist showed up with an amazing new technology that would transform everything in the world and darken the history of the human species forever after? And isn't it a little strange that he required no payment for this? That he asked for only one thing -- a gift of two healthy sperm whales? That's -- that's not true. But it is strange.
Razmislite o tome. Nije li malčice prikladno da se usred Svjetskog rata, od nikud, odjednom stvorio talijanski znanstvenik s nevjerojatnom novom tehnologijom koja će preobraziti sve na svijetu i zamračiti našu povijest ljudske vrste za sve vijekove? I nije li malo čudno kako nije zahtjevao da mu se plati za to? Da je tražio samo jednu stvar: dvije zdrave sperme kitova na dar? To -- to nije istina. Ali je čudno.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
And if Enrico Fermi were indeed a space alien, wouldn't he be the first to have tried to convince his fellow scientists that the space aliens are not already here? For it is given in certain UFO-ology or UFOlogy circles, that the aliens are already here and have been for millennia; that they have walked among us in disguise, observing us, guiding our evolution from ape to man -- if you believe in that sort of thing -- and, occasionally, kidnapping us in their flying saucers and taking us away to have sex with us in pyramids.
I ako je Enrico Fermi i bio svemirac, ne bi li on bio prvi koji bi pokušao uvjeriti svoje kolege znanstvenike kako svemirci još uvijek nisu ovdje? Jer dano je u određenoj NLO-ologiji ili NLO-ološkim krugovima, kako su izvanzemaljci već ovdje i prisutni su već tisućljećima. Kako su prerušeni hodali među nama, promatrajući nas, vodeći našu evoluciju od majmuna do čovjeka -- ukoliko vjerujete u te stvari. I s vremena na vrijeme, otimajući nas u svoje leteće tanjure i odvodeći nas kako bi vodili ljubav s nama u piramidama.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
It's a difficult theory to discount, I think you'll agree.
Teška je to teorija za osporiti, mislim da ćete se složiti.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
For even in my own life, there are memories I have that are difficult to explain -- happenings that are so odd and unaccountably weird, that it is difficult to imagine they were not the result of prolonged and frequent contact with aliens throughout my life. For how else will you explain the amazing and absolutely true close encounters that I had and will describe to you now? Encounter one: Ocean City, New Jersey, 1980. This was the summer when the special edition of "Close Encounters of the Third Kind" was released. And I went on vacation with my parents to the Jersey shore. Within 12 hours, I was horribly sunburned, just like Richard Dreyfuss in the movie.
Čak i u mom vlastitom životu, postoje sjećanja koja imam koja je teško za objasniti -- događanja koja su toliko nejasna i neobjašnjivo čudna, da je teško zamisliti kako nisu rezultat podužeg i učestalog kontakta s vanzemaljcima kroz moj život. Jer kako bi drukčije objasnili nevjerojatne i potpuno istinite bliske susrete koje sam imao a opisat ću vam ih sad? Susret broj Jedan: Ocean City, New Jersey, 1980. To je bilo ljeto kada je specijalno izdanje "Bliskih susreta treće vrste" izašlo. Išao sam na ljetovanje sa svojim roditeljima na obale Jersey-a. U roku 12 sati, užasno sam izgorio na suncu, kao Richard Dreyfuss u filmu.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
And so I spent the rest of the vacation largely sitting outside our little rental house at night, the sidewalk still warm from the sun, watching the skies for UFOs. What did I see? Stars, satellites, blinking airplanes -- typical sky junk. Occasionally, kids would come and join me and watch, but their necks soon got sore, and they would go off to the boardwalk to play video games and mingle with humans. I was pretty good at the video games. I was not very good at the other part, so I stayed alone with the cosmos.
I tako sam proveo ostatak odmora uvelike sjedeći noću pred našom malom unajmljenom kućom, pločnik još uvijek topao od sunca, gledajući nebo u potrazi za NLO-ima. Što sam vidio? Zvijezde, satelite, trepćuće avione -- tipično smeće sa neba. Povremeno, djeca bi došla i pridružila mi se i gledala, ali njihovi vratovi bi ih ubrzo počeli boljeti i otišli bi na rivu igrati video igrice i družiti se s ljudima. Bio sam prilično dobar u video igricama. Nisam bio dobar u onom drugom dijelu, pa sam ostao sam s kozmosom.
And that's when it happened. An elderly couple came walking down the street. I would say they were in their late seventies, and I would say that they were on a date, because he was wearing a very neat little suit with a yellow tie -- a brown suit. And she was wearing a cardigan, because it was now fully night and a chill was coming in off the ocean. I remember, for some reason, that they were exactly the same height. And then they stopped, and the man turned to me and said, "What are you looking for, flying saucers?"
I tada se to dogodilo. Stariji par je hodao niz ulicu. Rekao bih da su bili u svojim kasnim sedamdesetima, i rekao bih da su bili na spoju, jer je on nosio jako uredno malo odijelo sa žutom kravatom, smeđe odijelo. A ona je nosila kardigan, jer je već sada bila mrkla noć, a hladnoća je dolazila iz oceana. Sjećam se, iz nekog razloga, kako su bili približno iste visine. Stali su, i muškarac se okrenuo prema meni i rekao, "Što tražiš, leteće tanjure?"
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
You have to admit, that's a pretty boss piece of detective work for an old man on a date. But what was stranger still -- and even I realized it at the time, as a nine-year-old child -- was that they stopped at all. That this old man would interrupt his moonlight stroll with his sweetheart with the precise reason of making fun of a child. "Oh," he said, "little green men." And then his girlfriend joined in, too. "There's no such thing as space men," she said. "There's no such thing." And then they both laughed. "Ha, ha, ha." I looked around. The street was entirely empty. I had stopped hearing the sound of the ocean. It was as though time had stopped. I did not know why they were teasing me. I looked into their strangely angry faces, and I remember wondering, are they wearing rubber masks?
Morate priznati, to je prilično šefovski dio detektivskog posla za starca na spoju. Ali ono što je bilo još čudnije -- i ja sam čak shvatio to tada, kao devetogodišnje dijete -- jest da su oni uopće stali. Da će taj starac prekinuti svoju šetnju po mjesečini sa svojom draganom sa određenim razlogom ismijavanja dijeteta. "O," reče on, "mali zeleni ljudi." I tada se i njegova cura pridružila. "Ne postoje takve stvari kao što su svemirci," reče ona. "Ne postoji ništa takvog." I tada su se oboje počeli smijati. Ha, ha, ha. Gledao sam uokolo. Ulica je bila potpuno prazna. Prestao sam čuti zvuk oceana. Bilo je kao da je vrijeme stalo. Nisam znao zašto me zadirkuju. Pogledao sam u njihova začuđujuće ljuta lica, i sjećam se kako sam razmišljao, dali nose gumene maske?
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
And what would be behind those rubber masks, if they were? Giant, almond-shaped, unblinking eyes? Slits for mouths? The old man crooked his finger as though he were firing a gun, and then he made laser sounds. "Kew, kew, kew -- watch out." And they turned at once and walked away. The old man reached out his knobbly claw for the woman's hand, and found it, and left me alone. Now, you could describe this as a simple misunderstanding -- a strange encounter among humans. Maybe it was swamp gas, but -- (Laughter) -- I know what I saw.
I što bi se krilo iza tih gumenih maski, ako bi ih nosili? Ogromne, ne trepćuće oči u obliku badema? Prorezi kao usta? Starac je nakrivio svoj prst kao da puca iz pištolja, i proizvodio je zvukove lasera. Kju, kju, kju -- "Pazi se." I odjednom su se okrenuli i otišli. Starac je posegnuo svojom grbavom pandžom za rukom žene, i pronašao je, i ostavio me samog. Mogli biste opisati ovo kao jednostavan nesporazum -- čudan susret među ljudima. Možda je bio močvarni plin, ali -- (Smijeh) znam što sam vidio.
Close encounter two: Brookline, Massachusetts, 1984. I went to see the movie "Dune," and a girl talked to me. Now, on its face -- (Laughter) -- this is impossible on its face, I realize -- but it is absolutely true. It was opening night, naturally. I went with my friend Tim McGonigal, who sat on my left. On my right was the girl in question. She had long, curly black hair, a blue jean jacket. I remember, she had some sort of injury to her ankle, an Ace bandage, and she had crutches. She was very tall, I would say. I was starting high school at the time. I would say she was a junior, but I had never seen her before. She didn't go to my school. I didn't know her name, and I never will. She was sitting with someone who I presume was her mother, and they were talking about the novel, "Dune." They were both big fans, mother and daughter -- very unusual. They were talking about how their favorite characters were the giant sandworms. And then it got stranger. That's when she turned to me and said, "Are you looking forward to seeing the movie?"
Bliski susret broj dva: Brookline, Massachusetts, 1984. Išao sam pogledati film "Dina," i cura je pričala sa mnom. Na prvi pogled -- (Smijeh) to je nemoguće na prvi pogled, shvaćam -- ali je potpuno istinito. Naravno, bila je to premijerna noć. Išao sam sa svojim prijateljem Timom McGonigalom, koji sjedio s moje lijeve. S moje desne je bila, prije navedena, cura. Imala je dugačku, kovrčavu crnu kosu, plavu traper jaknu. Sjećam se, imala je neku vrstu ozljede na gležnju, Ace zavoj i imala je štake. Bila je vrlo visoka, rekao bih. U to vrijeme sam počinjao sa srednjom školom. Rekao bih da je bila drugi razred, ali nikad je prije nisam vidio. Nije išla u moju školu. Nisam znao njeno ime, niti ću ikad znati. Sjedila je s nekim tko je, pretpostavljam, njena majka, i pričale su o romanu, "Dina." Obje su bile velike obožavateljice, majka i kći -- vrlo neobično. Pričale su o tome kako su njihovi omiljeni likovi divovski pješćani crvi. A onda je postalo još neobičnije. Tada se okrenula prema meni i rekla, "Raduješ li se gledanju ovog filma?"
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
First of all, I was embarrassed because I had not read the novel "Dune" at that time. I was merely a connoisseur of movies featuring desert planets, as I still am.
Kao prvo, bilo me sram jer nisam pročitao roman "Dina" u to vrijeme. Bio sam samo znalac o filmovima u kojima su se pojavljivali napušteni planeti, kao što sam i sada.
(Laughter) But it was also the tone of how she asked the question: apropos of nothing, like she didn't even care about the answer, as though she just wanted to talk to me. I did not know what to say. I said, "Yes." I did not even turn my head. The movie began. I need not remind you that this was David Lynch's version of "Dune," in which all of the characters were sexy and deformed at the same time.
(Smijeh) Ali bilo je nešto i u tonu kojim je postavila pitanje: apropo ničega, kao da nije ni marila za odgovor, kao da je samo htjela pričati sa mnom. NIsam znao što reći. Rekao sam, "Da." Nisam čak ni okrenuo glavu. Film je počeo. Ne moram vas podsjećati da je to bila verzija "Dine", Davida Lynch-a, u kojoj su svi likovi seksi i unakaženi u isto vrijeme.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
There was a character called the Third-Stage Guild Navigator, which was a kind of giant, floating fetus-creature that lived in a giant tank with this orange mist of psychedelic spice swirling around him, allowing him to bend space and time. He could never leave the tank or interact with the outside world. He had become, in his isolation, so deformed and so sexy, that he had to talk through a kind of old-timey radio to the outside world, and could never touch them. I mean, I liked him a lot better than the sandworms. The sandworms were fine, but your favorite character? Please.
Bio je lik koji se zvao Navigator udruženja treće razine, koji je bio divovsko, plutajuće stvorenje u obliku fetusa a koji je živio u ogromnom spremniku s narančastom izmaglicom od psihodeličnog začina koja se kovitlala oko njega, dopuštajući mu da iskrivljuje prostor i vrijeme. Nikad nije mogao napustiti spremnik ili komunicirati s vanjskim svijetom. Postao je, u svojoj izoliranosti, toliko unakažen i toliko seksi, da je morao govoriti pomoću starinskog radio prijemnika prema vanjskom svijetu, i nikad ih nije mogao dodirnuti. Mislim, sviđao mi se puno više od pješćanih crva. Pješćani crvi su dobri, ali tvoj omiljeni lik? Molim vas.
When the movie ended, everyone seemed very happy to get up and get out of the theatre as soon as possible. Except for the girl. As I walked out, her pace slowed. Perhaps it was the crutches, but it seemed -- (Laughter) -- it seemed as though she might want to talk to me again. When I say it out loud, it sounds so ridiculous, but I can only come to the conclusion that it was what, in the alien abductee community, they call a "screen memory": a ridiculous false recollection designed by their brain to cover up some trauma -- say, of being kidnapped and flown off to a sex pyramid.
Kada je film završio, svi su se doimali jako sretnima što mogu ustati i izaći iz ovog kina što je brže moguće. Osim te cure. Kako sam odlazio, njezin korak je bio sporiji. Možda je to zbog štaka, ali činilo se -- (Smijeh) činilo se kao da bi mogla opet htjeti razgovarati sa mnom. Kada to kažem naglas, zvuči toliko smiješno, ali mogu doći jedino do zaključka kako je to bilo ono što u zajednici otetih od strane vanzemaljaca nazivaju "memorija zaslona." Smiješno lažno sjećanje dizajnirano od strane njihovog mozga kako bi prikrili traumu -- recimo, biti otet i odveden u piramidu seksa.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
And so I sure am glad I did not slow down to talk to her. I sure am glad I never saw her again.
I stoga mi je drago što nisam usporio kako bih pričao sa njom. Drago mi je da je nikad više nisam vidio.
Close encounter three: Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, 1989. In the mid-to-late '80s, the novelist Whitley Strieber wrote a book called "Communion," in which he described his own lifelong experiences being abducted by aliens. And he also described the phenomenon known in this community as "lost time," where Whitley Strieber would suddenly become aware that he could not remember the previous ten minutes, or the previous ten hours, or the previous ten days. And would come to the conclusion that that was when the aliens were taking him and giving him rectal probes.
Bliski susret broj tri: Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, 1989. U kasnim -- sredinom i kasnih 80-ih, romanopisac Whitley Strieber je napisao knjigu zvanu "Pričest," u kojoj je opisao vlastita cjeloživotna iskustva o tome kako je to biti otet od strane vanzemaljaca. I opisao je fenomen poznat u ovoj zajednici kao "izgubljeno vrijeme", gdje bi Whitley Strieber iznenada postao svjestan da se ne može sjetiti proteklih deset minuta, ili proteklih deset sati, ili proteklih deset dana. I došao bi do zaključka da su ga tada vanzemaljci odvodili i stavljali mu rektalne sonde.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
This book became, naturally, an enormous best-seller. This image by Ted Joseph was from that book, and was his, sort of, police sketch of what the creatures looked like that Whitley Strieber had described to him. And it was so successful that they made it into a movie. And in 1989, the way I remember it, I was in Philadelphia visiting my girlfriend, and we decided, apropos of nothing, to go see this movie. And the way I remember it, the movie featured these details. One: Whitley Strieber was played by Christopher Walken. Two: the alien was played by a rubber puppet.
Ova knjiga je postala, naravno, ogroman bestseler. Ova slika Ted-a Joseph-a je iz te knjige, i to je bila njegova, kao, policijska skica kako bi ta stvorenja izgledala a koja mu je Whitley Strieber opisao. I bila je toliko popularna da su napravili i film po njoj. 1989., koliko se ja sjećam, bio sam u Philadephiji s -- u posjetu svojoj curi, i odlučili smo, apropo ničega, da ćemo otići pogledati taj film. I koliko se ja sjećam, film je sadržavao sljedeće detalje. Jedan: Whitley Strieber-a je glumio Christopher Walken. Dva: Vanzemaljca je glumio gumeni lutak.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
Three: there was a surprisingly long sequence of the film in which the rubber puppet gives Christopher Walken a rectal probe. Four: this was being shown in a regular movie theater in Center City, Philadelphia. Five: all of which is to say, they made a movie out of the book, "Communion," and it starred Christopher Walken. Does something seem strange about this to you? Something odd? Something off? Something wrong with this picture? Think about it. Yes. The answer is: I had a girlfriend. What?
Tri: Postoji izrazito dugačak slijed filma u kojem gumeni lutak stavlja Christopher-u Walken-u rektalnu sondu. Četiri: To je bilo prikazano u redovnom kinu u centru Philadelhije. Pet: Sve što se može reći, snimili su film po knjizi, "Pričest," i glumio je Christopher Walken. Jel' vam se čini da je nešto čudno oko toga? Nešto neobično? Nešto što ne bi trebalo biti? Nešto krivo sa cijelim tim prizorom? Razmislite. Da. Odgovor je: Imao sam curu. Što?
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
How did this happen? When did this happen? I remember walking out of the theater and becoming suddenly aware of this fact, as we walked hand in hand, and pondering these very same questions. And to this day, I have no answer for you. Close encounter four: the Algarve, Portugal, 1991. Some years later, I and this woman -- we'll call her "Catherine Fletcher" -- (Laughter) -- went traveling through the south of Portugal together. We stayed in old, crumbling, walled cities, in tiny little hotels, and we would climb up to the roof and drink Vinho Verde and watch the sun set and play checkers. What? Did we do this? Really? Does anyone do this? We went to some topless beaches. Excuse me? No, not in my life. For what it's worth, we went to Sagres, which was considered, at the time, to be the end of the world. And there I was chased by a pack of feral dogs on the dock, and the lead dog bit me on the ass, requiring me to go to a strange Portuguese clinic and receive an ass shot. Make of that what you will.
Kako se to dogodilo? Kada se to dogodilo? Sjećam se odlaska iz kina i postepenog osvještavanja te činjenice, dok smo hodali ruku pod ruku, i probirali kroz ta ista pitanja. I sve do ovog dana, nemam odgovor za vas. Bliski susret broj četiri: Algarva, Portugal, 1991. Nekoliko godina kasnije, ja i ta žena - zvat ćemo je "Catherine Fletcher" -- (Smijeh) smo zajedno pošli na putovanje po jugu Portugala. Odsjedali smo u starim, pucajućim, gradovima sa zidinama, u majušnim hotelima, i uspeli bi se na krov i pili bi Vinho Verde (zeleno vino) i promatrali zalazak sunca i igrali bi igru dame. Što? Jesmo li to radili? Doista? Radi li to itko? Išli smo na neke toples plaže. Molim? Ne, ne u mom životu. Ako bilo što, išli smo u Sagres, koji je, u to vrijeme, bio smatran krajem svijeta. I tamo me po dokovima ganjao čopor divljih pasa, i vodeći pas me ugrizao za stražnjicu, nakon čega sam morao otići u čudnu Portugalsku kliniku gdje sam primio injekciju. Učinite od toga što god želite.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
Our last day in Portugal, we were in the district capital of Faro, and Catherine decided that she wanted to go to the beach one last time. Now, Faro is a bustling little city, and to get to the beach, she explained, you would have to take a bus and then a boat. And did I want to come with? But I was exhausted and dog-bitten, and so I said, "No." I remember what she looked like before she left. The freckles had grown and multiplied on her face and shoulders, clustering into a kind of a tan. A tan, we were both tan -- is this true? Her eyes were extra bright and extra blue, as a result. She was smiling. She was a single woman about to go alone into a country, not even speaking the language, to travel alone by bus and boat to go to a beach she did not know or had never seen. I loved her, and then she went out into that strange, alien land.
Naš zadnji dan u Portugalu, bili smo u Faru, glavnom gradu okruga, i Catherine je odlučila da želi otići na plažu po posljednji put. Faro je užurban mali grad, te da bi došao do plaže, objasnila je, potrebno je uzeti autobus te zatim čamac. I jesam li ja želio poći s njom? Ali bio sam iscrpljen i ugrizao me pas, pa sam rekao, "Ne." Sjećam se kako je izgledala prije nego je otišla. Pjege su izrasle i razmnožile se po njenom licu i ramenima, grupirajući se u neku vrstu preplanulosti. Preplanulost, oboje smo bili preplanuli. Je li to istina? Kao rezultat toga, njene oči su bile osobito svjetle i osobito plave. Smješila se. Bila je jedina žena koja će ubrzo sama otići u zemlju, ne govoreći jezik, kako bi putovala sama u autobusus i čamcu da dođe do plaže koju nije poznavala i koju nije nikad vidjela. Volio sam je, a onda je otišla van u tu čudnu, nepoznatu zemlju.
It took me some time to come to my senses. I had my own "lost time" moment, where I woke up and suddenly realized it was very late in the day, almost dinnertime, and she had not come back. Nervous, I went down to the street to look for her. Now, I did not speak Portuguese. I did not know where the beach was. I could not call her on a cell phone because this was 1991, and the aliens had not given us that technology yet.
Trebalo mi je neko vrijeme da dođem k sebi. Doživio sam svoj vlastiti trenutak "izgubljenog vremena" kada sam se probudio i iznenada shvatio da je već kasno, skoro vrijeme za večeru, a ona se još nije vratila. Uzrujan, pošao sam je tražiti na ulicu. Nisam pričao portugalski. Nisam znao gdje se plaža nalazi. Nisam je mogao nazvati na mobilni telefon jer to je bila 1991. godina, i vanzemaljci nam još nisu dali tu tehnologiju.
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
I realized that the day would only have two possible outcomes: either Catherine would come back to the hotel, or she would never come back to the hotel. And so I sat down to wait. I did not watch the skies, but the very end of the street where the buses and cars and pedestrians and little scooters were moving along. And I watched those constellations shift, hoping that they would part and I would see her face. It was at that moment, in that very small town of 30,000 or so, that I truly appreciated the vastness of the universe and the searching we might do in it. And that's when the Liberians came along. Five young men -- all laughing, happy, traveling together, coming back to this hotel where they were staying.
Shvatio sam da će dan imati samo dva moguća ishoda: ili će se Catherine vratiti u hotel ili se nikad neće vratiti u hotel. Stoga sam sjeo i čekao. Nisam gledao u nebo, već sam kraj ulice gdje su se autobusi i auti i pješaci i mali skuteri kretali. I gledao sam kako se ta zvijezđa pomiču, nadajući se da će se razdvojiti i da ću vidjeti njeno lice. U tom trenutku, u tom malom gradu od nekih 30.000, sam doista cijenio prostranstvo svemira i potragu u koju bismo mi mogli krenuti. I tada su Liberijci došli. Pet mladih muškaraca -- svi se smiju, sretni su, putuju zajedno, vraćajući se u ovaj hotel gdje su odsjeli.
One of them was named Joseph, and he asked me what was I doing, and I explained. And he said, "Don't worry." He was sure that Catherine would be safe. But he did not seem so very sure, for he sat down to wait with me. And for the next two hours, they all waited with me: taking turns, going up to their room, coming back, telling me jokes, distracting me. Two hours, they gave me a message. We are not alone.
Jednom od njih je bilo ime Joseph, i pitao me što to radim, a ja sam objasnio. Reče, "Ne brini." Bio je siguran kako će sve biti u redu sa Catherine. Ali nije se činio tako uvjeren, jer je sjeo i zajedno sa mnom čekao. I u sljedeća dva sata, svi su čekali sa mnom: rotirajući se, odlazeći u svoju sobu, vračajući se, pričajući mi šale, odvlačeći mi pažnju. Dva sata, dali su mi poruku. Nismo sami.
And then, in the middle of a sentence, at the very birth of twilight, I turned and looked down the street. The stars aligned, and she came back. She was smiling. She did not understand why I was so worried. Neither did the Liberians, although there was a huge amount of relief in their laughter as they clapped us on the back, and went back up to their room and left us alone in the street, holding hands. An event like this leaves a scar on the memory, much like a piece of alien technology that has been inserted into your buttocks by a "Portuguese doctor."
I tada, usred rečenice, pred samo rođenje sumraka, okrenuo sam se i pogledao dolje niz ulicu. Zvijezde su se posložile i ona se vratila. Smiješila se. Nije shvaćala zašto sam se toliko zabrinuo. Niti su Liberijci, premda je bila prisutna velika doza olakšanja u njihovom smijehu kada su nas potapšali po leđima i otišli gore u svoju sobu ostavljajući nas same na ulici, držeći se za ruke. Takav događaj ostavlja ožiljak u sjećanju, slično kao i komadić vanzemaljske tehnologije koji je umetnut u tvoju zadnjicu od strane "portugalskog doktora".
(Laughter)
(Smijeh)
And even now, a decade and a half later, even now that we are married, I look for her still, whenever she is not in the room. And even though, I think you'll agree, it is probable that during the time she was away, she was kidnapped and replaced by an alien clone, I love her and wait for her still.
Čak i sad, desetljeće i pol kasnije, čak i sad kada smo udani, tražim je kad god nije u prostoriji. Čak i ako se složite kako je vjerojatno da je tijekom vremena kada je nije bilo, bila oteta i zamijenjena klonom vanzemaljca, volim je i još uvijek je čekam.
Thank you for your kind attention.
Hvala vam na pažnji.
(Applause)
(Pljesak)