What does a working mother look like? If you ask the Internet, this is what you'll be told. Never mind that this is what you'll actually produce if you attempt to work at a computer with a baby on your lap.
Como é unha nai traballadora? Se lle preguntan a Internet, esta é a resposta que terán. Tanto ten se isto é o que escriben realmente se tentan traballar no ordenador cun neno no colo.
(Laughter)
(Risas)
But no, this isn't a working mother. You'll notice a theme in these photos. We'll look at a lot of them. That theme is amazing natural lighting, which, as we all know, is the hallmark of every American workplace.
E non, esta non é unha nai traballadora. Percibirán un tema recorrente nestas fotos ese tema é a marabillosa luz natural que, como todos sabemos, é a habitual en calquera lugar de traballo nos EUA.
There are thousands of images like these. Just put the term "working mother" into any Google image search engine, stock photo site. They're all over the Internet, they're topping blog posts and news pieces, and I've become kind of obsessed with them and the lie that they tell us and the comfort that they give us, that when it comes to new working motherhood in America, everything's fine.
Hai miles de imaxes coma esta. Abonda con escribir "nai traballadora" en calquera motor de busca ou galería de fotos. Están por toda a Internet, encabezando entradas de blog e noticias, e estamos obsesionados con elas e a mentira que nos contan e a tranquilidade que nos dan de que en relación coas novas nais traballadoras todo vai de marabilla.
But it's not fine. As a country, we are sending millions of women back to work every year, incredibly and kind of horrifically soon after they give birth. That's a moral problem but today I'm also going to tell you why it's an economic problem.
Pero non vai de marabilla. Como país, devolvemos ao traballo millóns de mulleres cada ano, cunha rapidez incrible e terrible, despois de que dean a luz. Este é un problema moral, pero hoxe quero explicar por que é tamén un problema económico.
I got so annoyed and obsessed with the unreality of these images, which look nothing like my life, that I recently decided to shoot and star in a parody series of stock photos that I hoped the world would start to use just showing the really awkward reality of going back to work when your baby's food source is attached to your body. I'm just going to show you two of them.
Remato tan anoxada e obsesionada con estas imaxes tan irreais tan diferentes da miña vida, que hai pouco decidín facer e protagonizar unhas serie de fotos paródicas coa esperanza de que a xente as empezase a usar amosando a curiosa realidade de volver ao traballo cando a comida do teu neno vai pegada ao teu corpo. Voulles amosar dúas delas.
(Laughter)
(Risas)
Nothing says "Give that girl a promotion" like leaking breast milk through your dress during a presentation. You'll notice that there's no baby in this photo, because that's not how this works, not for most working mothers.
Nada axuda tanto a conseguir un ascenso como as manchas de leite no vestido durante unha presentación. Fíxense en que non hai ningún neno na foto porque non funciona así, polo menos para a maioría das nais.
Did you know, and this will ruin your day, that every time a toilet is flushed, its contents are aerosolized and they'll stay airborne for hours? And yet, for many new working mothers, this is the only place during the day that they can find to make food for their newborn babies.
Sabían, e isto vailles estragar o día, que cada vez que tiran da cisterna o que hai dentro vaporízase e permanece no aire durante horas? Aínda así, para moitas nais traballadoras ese é o único lugar en todo o día en que poden darlles de comer aos seus bebés acabados de nacer.
I put these things, a whole dozen of them, into the world. I wanted to make a point. I didn't know what I was also doing was opening a door, because now, total strangers from all walks of life write to me all the time just to tell me what it's like for them to go back to work within days or weeks of having a baby. I'm going to share 10 of their stories with you today. They are totally real, some of them are very raw, and not one of them looks anything like this.
Presento estas cousas, unha ducia delas, ao mundo. Quería deixar algo claro. Non sabía que ao mesmo tempo estaba abrindo unha porta porque agora todo tipo de persoas descoñecidas me escriben a cadora para me contaren como é para elas volver ao traballo só uns días ou semanas despois de teren un fillo. Vou compartir con vostedes dez das súas historias hoxe. Son totalmente reais, algunhas moi dolorosas e ningunha delas se parece a isto.
Here's the first. "I was an active duty service member at a federal prison. I returned to work after the maximum allowed eight weeks for my C-section. A male coworker was annoyed that I had been out on 'vacation,' so he intentionally opened the door on me while I was pumping breast milk and stood in the doorway with inmates in the hallway."
Aquí vai a primeira. "Era unha traballadora activa nunha prisión federal. Volvín ao traballo tras o máximo permitido de oito semanas após unha cesárea. Un compañeiro varón enfadouse porque eu marchara 'de vacacións', así que abriu a mantenta a porta mentres eu sacaba leite do peito e permaneceu na porta cos reclusos no corredor".
Most of the stories that these women, total strangers, send to me now, are not actually even about breastfeeding.
Moitas das historias que estas mulleres envían non tratan sequera sobre aleitar.
A woman wrote to me to say, "I gave birth to twins and went back to work after seven unpaid weeks. Emotionally, I was a wreck. Physically, I had a severe hemorrhage during labor, and major tearing, so I could barely get up, sit or walk. My employer told me I wasn't allowed to use my available vacation days because it was budget season."
Unha muller escribiume para dicir: "Tiven dous xemelgos e volvín ao traballo tras sete semanas sen salario. Estaba emocionalmente rota. Fisicamente tivera unha grande hemorraxia e un desgarro durante o parto, apenas podía erguerme, sentarme ou andar. O meu xefe díxome que non podía usar os meus días de vacacións porque era tempada alta".
I've come to believe that we can't look situations like these in the eye because then we'd be horrified, and if we get horrified then we have to do something about it. So we choose to look at, and believe, this image. I don't really know what's going on in this picture, because I find it weird and slightly creepy.
Penso que non podemos asumir situacións coma esta porque nos horrorizaríamos, e se nos horrorizamos, entón temos que reaccionar. Eliximos, entón, mirar e crer nesta imaxe. Non teño claro que ocorre nesta imaxe, porque me parece rara e algo sinistra.
(Laughter)
(Risas)
Like, what is she doing? But I know what it tells us. It tells us that everything's fine. This working mother, all working mothers and all of their babies, are fine. There's nothing to see here. And anyway, women have made a choice, so none of it's even our problem.
Ela, que está a facer? Pero sei o que a foto nos conta. Cóntanos que todo vai ben. Todo vai ben para esta nai, para todas as nais traballadoras e todos os nenos. Aquí non hai nada que mirar. E aínda así, as mulleres decidiron, así que nada disto é o noso problema.
I want to break this choice thing down into two parts. The first choice says that women have chosen to work. So, that's not true. Today in America, women make up 47 percent of the workforce, and in 40 percent of American households a woman is the sole or primary breadwinner. Our paid work is a part, a huge part, of the engine of this economy, and it is essential for the engines of our families. On a national level, our paid work is not optional.
Quero dividir este tema da elección en dúas partes. A primeira elección di que as mulleres decidiron traballar. E non é verdade. En América as mulleres son hoxe o 47% da poboación activa, e no 40% dos fogares americanos a muller é o único ou o principal sustento da familia. O noso traballo remunerado é unha parte enorme do motor desta economía, e é esencial para a economía das nosas familias. A nivel nacional, o noso traballo non é unha opción.
Choice number two says that women are choosing to have babies, so women alone should bear the consequences of those choices. You know, that's one of those things that when you hear it in passing, can sound correct. I didn't make you have a baby. I certainly wasn't there when that happened. But that stance ignores a fundamental truth, which is that our procreation on a national scale is not optional. The babies that women, many of them working women, are having today, will one day fill our workforce, protect our shores, make up our tax base. Our procreation on a national scale is not optional. These aren't choices. We need women to work. We need working women to have babies. So we should make doing those things at the same time at least palatable, right?
A segunda di que as mulleres decidiron ter fillos, así que teñen que cangar coas consecuencias da súa decisión. En fin, esta é unha desas cousas que poden parecer verdade se as oes de pasada. Eu non che mandei ter un neno. Non estaba alí cando pasou. Pero esta afirmación ignora unha verdade fundamental: a procreación a escala nacional non é unha opción. Os fillos que teñen estas mulleres, moitas traballadoras, serán algún día os nosos traballadores, protexerán as fronteiras, pagarán os impostos. A procreación non é unha opción a escala nacional. Non son escollas. Necesitamos que as mulleres traballen. Necesitamos que as mulleres teñan fillos. Entón deberiamos facer que as dúas cousas á vez fosen, como mínimo, aceptables, non si?
OK, this is pop quiz time: what percentage of working women in America do you think have no access to paid maternity leave? 88 percent. 88 percent of working mothers will not get one minute of paid leave after they have a baby.
Ben, é tempo para o test de revista: que porcentaxe de mulleres traballadoras pensades que nos EUA non ten acceso a baixa de maternidade? 88 por cento. O 88 por cento de nais traballadoras non terán nin unha miga da axuda despois de ter o seu fillo.
So now you're thinking about unpaid leave. It exists in America. It's called FMLA. It does not work. Because of the way it's structured, all kinds of exceptions, half of new mothers are ineligible for it.
Pensade agora na baixa sen dereito a cobro. Existe nos EUA. Chámase FMLA e non funciona. Por como se estrutura, con todo tipo de excepcións, a metade das nais non pode optar a ela.
Here's what that looks like. "We adopted our son. When I got the call, the day he was born, I had to take off work. I had not been there long enough to qualify for FMLA, so I wasn't eligible for unpaid leave. When I took time off to meet my newborn son, I lost my job."
Funciona así. "Adoptamos o noso fillo. Cando me chamaron o día que naceu, tiven que saír do traballo. Non estivera tempo abondo para ter dereito ao FMLA, polo que non podía optar á baixa. Cando pedín días libres para estar co meu novo fillo perdín o traballo."
These corporate stock photos hide another reality, another layer. Of those who do have access to just that unpaid leave, most women can't afford to take much of it at all. A nurse told me, "I didn't qualify for short-term disability because my pregnancy was considered a preexisting condition. We used up all of our tax returns and half of our savings during my six unpaid weeks. We just couldn't manage any longer. Physically it was hard, but emotionally it was worse. I struggled for months being away from my son."
Este tipo de fotos corporativas agochan outra realidade. Das nais que si teñen acceso á baixa sen dereito a cobro, moitas non poden permitirse usala. Unha enfermeira explicoume "Non tiña opción á baixa maternal porque o meu embarazo foi considerado condición preexistente. Gastamos toda a devolución de facenda e a metade dos aforros nas miñas seis semanas sen soldo. Non podiamos seguir por máis tempo. Era duro a nivel físico, pero no emocional era peor. Sufrín durante meses estando lonxe do meu fillo".
So this decision to go back to work so early, it's a rational economic decision driven by family finances, but it's often physically horrific because putting a human into the world is messy.
Entón esta decisión de volver tan cedo ao traballo é unha decisión económica racional motivada pola economía familiar, pero a miúdo é horrible a nivel físico porque traer un ser humano ao mundo é complicado.
A waitress told me, "With my first baby, I was back at work five weeks postpartum. With my second, I had to have major surgery after giving birth, so I waited until six weeks to go back. I had third degree tears."
Unha camareira contoume: "Co meu primeiro fillo, volvín ao traballo cinco semanas após o parto. Co segundo, tiven unha cirurxía seria despois de dar a luz e tiven que esperar seis semanas. Tiña desgarros de nivel tres."
23 percent of new working mothers in America will be back on the job within two weeks of giving birth.
O 23% das novas nais traballadoras nos EUA volverán ao traballo dúas semanas despois do parto.
"I worked as a bartender and cook, average of 75 hours a week while pregnant. I had to return to work before my baby was a month old, working 60 hours a week. One of my coworkers was only able to afford 10 days off with her baby."
"Traballaba como camareira e cociñeira 75 horas á semana durante o embarazo. Volvín traballar antes de que o neno tivese un mes, traballando 60 horas á semana. Unha das miñas compañeiras só puido permitirse 10 días co seu neno."
Of course, this isn't just a scenario with economic and physical implications. Childbirth is, and always will be, an enormous psychological event.
Por suposto, esta non é só unha situación con implicacións económicas e físicas. O nacemento é, e será sempre, un enorme acontecemento psicolóxico.
A teacher told me, "I returned to work eight weeks after my son was born. I already suffer from anxiety, but the panic attacks I had prior to returning to work were unbearable."
Unha profesora explicoume: "Volvín ao traballo oito semanas despois do nacemento. Xa tiña problemas de ansiedade, pero os ataques de pánico que tiven antes de volver eran insoportables".
Statistically speaking, the shorter a woman's leave after having a baby, the more likely she will be to suffer from postpartum mood disorders like depression and anxiety, and among many potential consequences of those disorders, suicide is the second most common cause of death in a woman's first year postpartum.
A nivel estatístico, canto menos dure a baixa despois de ter o fillo, máis probable é que se sufran problemas emocionais posparto, como depresión ou ansiedade. Entre outras consecuencias posibles destas desordes, o suicidio é a segunda causa de morte máis frecuente no primeiro ano despois do parto.
Heads up that this next story -- I've never met this woman, but I find it hard to get through.
Atención á seguinte historia! Nunca coñecín a esta muller, a súa historia éme difícil de aturar.
"I feel tremendous grief and rage that I lost an essential, irreplaceable and formative time with my son. Labor and delivery left me feeling absolutely broken. For months, all I remember is the screaming: colic, they said. On the inside, I was drowning. Every morning, I asked myself how much longer I could do it. I was allowed to bring my baby to work. I closed my office door while I rocked and shushed and begged him to stop screaming so I wouldn't get in trouble. I hid behind that office door every damn day and cried while he screamed. I cried in the bathroom while I washed out the pump equipment. Every day, I cried all the way to work and all the way home again. I promised my boss that the work I didn't get done during the day, I'd make up at night from home. I thought, there's just something wrong with me that I can't swing this."
"Sinto moitísima pena e rabia porque perdín un tempo fundamental, insubstituíble e formativo co meu fillo. O parto e o nacemento deixáronme desfeita. Daqueles meses só lembro os berros: dixeron que era un cólico. Eu afogaba por dentro. Preguntábame cada mañá durante canto tempo podería aturalo. Deixáronme levar o neno ao traballo. Pechei a porta da oficina mentres o aloumiñaba e lle suplicaba que deixase de berrar para non ter problemas eu. Agocheime detrás da porta cada maldito día e choraba mentres el berraba. Choraba no baño mentres limpaba o sacaleite. Cada día choraba ao ir traballar e ao volver para a casa. Prometínlle ao meu xefe que o traballo que non facía polo día, faríao de noite na casa. Pensei que algo non marchaba ben en min, que non podía controlalo".
So those are the mothers. What of the babies? As a country, do we care about the millions of babies born every year to working mothers? I say we don't, not until they're of working and tax-paying and military-serving age. We tell them we'll see them in 18 years, and getting there is kind of on them. One of the reasons I know this is that babies whose mothers have 12 or more weeks at home with them are more likely to get their vaccinations and their well checks in their first year, so those babies are more protected from deadly and disabling diseases. But those things are hidden behind images like this.
Así son as nais. E os nenos? Como país, preocupámonos polos millóns de nenos que as nais traballadoras teñen cada ano? Penso que non, non até que chegan á idade de traballar e pagar impostos e ser soldados. Moi ben, xa os veremos en 18 anos, chegar ata alí xa é cousa súa. Unha das razóns polas que o sei é porque os fillos de nais que pasan 12 ou máis semanas na casa con eles teñen mais posibilidades de ser vacinados e examinados no seu primeiro ano. Eses nenos están máis protexidos fronte a enfermidades mortais e perigosas. Imaxes coma esta agochan esas realidades.
America has a message for new mothers who work and for their babies. Whatever time you get together, you should be grateful for it, and you're an inconvenience to the economy and to your employers. That narrative of gratitude runs through a lot of the stories I hear.
Os EUA teñen unha mensaxe para as nais traballadoras e os seus fillos. Deberías estar agradecida polo tempo que tes co teu fillo, e es un estorbo para a economía e para os teus xefes. Esta narrativa da gratitude existe en moitas historias que escoito.
A woman told me, "I went back at eight weeks after my C-section because my husband was out of work. Without me, my daughter had failure to thrive. She wouldn't take a bottle. She started losing weight. Thankfully, my manager was very understanding. He let my mom bring my baby, who was on oxygen and a monitor, four times a shift so I could nurse her."
Unha muller díxome: "Volvín ás oito semanas da miña cesárea porque o meu home non tiña traballo. Sen min, a milla filla tivo problemas para desenvolverse. Non tomaba o biberón. Empezou a perder peso. Por sorte, o meu xefe foi moi comprensivo. Miña nai puido traer o neno, que estaba con osíxeno e monitorizado catro veces por quenda para que o aleitase".
There's a little club of countries in the world that offer no national paid leave to new mothers. Care to guess who they are? The first eight make up eight million in total population. They are Papua New Guinea, Suriname and the tiny island nations of Micronesia, Marshall Islands, Nauru, Niue, Palau and Tonga. Number nine is the United States of America, with 320 million people. Oh, that's it. That's the end of the list. Every other economy on the planet has found a way to make some level of national paid leave work for the people doing the work of the future of those countries, but we say, "We couldn't possibly do that." We say that the market will solve this problem, and then we cheer when corporations offer even more paid leave to the women who are already the highest-educated and highest-paid among us. Remember that 88 percent? Those middle- and low-income women are not going to participate in that. We know that there are staggering economic, financial, physical and emotional costs to this approach. We have decided -- decided, not an accident, to pass these costs directly on to working mothers and their babies. We know the price tag is higher for low-income women, therefore disproportionately for women of color. We pass them on anyway.
Hai un pequeno club de países no mundo que non ofrece baixas pagadas estatais ás nais. Saben cales son? Os primeiros oito suman en total oito millóns de habitantes. Son Papua Nova Guinea, Surinam e as pequenas illas-nación de Micronesia, as Illas Marshall, Nauru, Niue, Palau e Tonga. O número nove son os Estados Unidos de América con 320 millóns de persoas. E xa está. Ese é o final da lista. Todas as outras economías do mundo atoparon un xeito de ofrecer baixas de maternidade pagadas para as persoas cuxo traballo significa o futuro deses países, pero dicimos "Non é posible facelo". Dicimos que o mercado solucionará este problema e celebrámolo cando as empresas ofrecen máis baixas pagadas ás mulleres, que son xa as que teñen mellores estudos e soldos de entre nós. Lembran o 88 por cento? As mulleres con soldos medios e baixos non reciben esas axudas. Sabemos que este enfoque ten asombrosos custos económicos, financeiros, físicos e emocionais. Demos en decidir --en decidir, non por accidente-- cargarlles estes custos ás mulleres traballadoras e aos seus fillos. Sabemos que o prezo é alto para mulleres con soldo baixo, inda máis desproporcionado para as mulleres de color. Cargámoslles os custos igual.
All of this is to America's shame. But it's also to America's risk. Because what would happen if all of these individual so-called choices to have babies started to turn into individual choices not to have babies.
Todo isto é a vergoña de América. Pero é tamén o risco de América. Porque podería pasar que todas estas supostas decisións de ter fillos se volvesen decisións individuais de non telos.
One woman told me, "New motherhood is hard. It shouldn't be traumatic. When we talk about expanding our family now, we focus on how much time I would have to care for myself and a new baby. If we were to have to do it again the same way as with our first, we might stick with one kid."
Unha muller díxome: "A maternidade moderna é difícil. Non debería ser un trauma. Cando agora falamos de aumentar a familia, centrámonos no tempo que teremos para coidar de nós e do neno. Se tivésemos que facer igual que co primeiro fillo, talvez teriamos un só neno".
The birthrate needed in America to keep the population stable is 2.1 live births per woman. In America today, we are at 1.86. We need women to have babies, and we are actively disincentivizing working women from doing that. What would happen to work force, to innovation, to GDP, if one by one, the working mothers of this country were to decide that they can't bear to do this thing more than once?
A taxa de natalidade que os EUA precisan para manter a poboación é de 2,1 fillos por muller. Hoxe temos un 1,86. Precisamos que as mulleres teñan fillos, e estamos desanimando ás mulleres traballadoras que poderían facelo. Que pasaría coa poboación activa, a innovación e o PIB se unha a unha, as mulleres deste país decidisen que non poden facer isto máis dunha vez?
I'm here today with only one idea worth spreading, and you've guessed what it is. It is long since time for the most powerful country on Earth to offer national paid leave to the people doing the work of the future of this country and to the babies who represent that future. Childbirth is a public good. This leave should be state-subsidized. It should have no exceptions for small businesses, length of employment or entrepreneurs. It should be able to be shared between partners. I've talked today a lot about mothers, but co-parents matter on so many levels.
Estou aquí hoxe cunha única idea que paga a pena compartir e xa saben cal é. Chegou a hora de que o país máis poderoso da Terra ofreza baixas de maternidade pagadas para as persoas que traballan polo futuro deste país e para os nenos que representan este futuro. O nacemento é un ben de interese público. A baixa debería ser un subsidio estatal. Non debería haber excepcións para negocios pequenos, duración do traballo ou emprendedores. Debería poderse compartir entre os proxenitores. Falei deste tema con moitas nais, pero os pais son chave a moitos niveis.
Not one more woman should have to go back to work while she is hobbling and bleeding. Not one more family should have to drain their savings account to buy a few days of rest and recovery and bonding. Not one more fragile infant should have to go directly from the incubator to day care because his parents have used up all of their meager time sitting in the NICU. Not one more working family should be told that the collision of their work, their needed work and their needed parenthood, is their problem alone.
Ningunha muller debería volver ao traballo mentres coxea e sangra. Ningunha familia debería consumir os seus aforros para mercar uns días de descanso, recuperación e achegamento. Ningún neno fraxil tería que ir directamente da incubadora á gardería porque os seus pais usaron todo o seu escaso tempo sentados na UCI. A ningunha familia traballadora deberìa dicírselle que a relación entre o seu traballo, que precisan, e a maternidade que queren é o seu problema.
The catch is that when this is happening to a new family, it is consuming, and a family with a new baby is more financially vulnerable than they've ever been before, so that new mother cannot afford to speak up on her own behalf. But all of us have voices. I am done, done having babies, and you might be pre-baby, you might be post-baby, you might be no baby. It should not matter. We have to stop framing this as a mother's issue, or even a women's issue. This is an American issue.
O problema é que cando isto lle pasa a unha nova familia, é esgotador, e unha familia cun neno é máis vulnerable economicamente do que nunca antes fora, así que a nai non pode falar por si mesma. Pero todos nós temos voces. Eu xa non vou ter máis fillos, e vostede pode ser pre-neno, pode ser post-neno pode ser ningún neno. Tanto debería ter. Deixemos de entendelo como un problema das nais, nin sequera das mulleres. É un problema dos EUA.
We need to stop buying the lie that these images tell us. We need to stop being comforted by them. We need to question why we're told that this can't work when we see it work everywhere all over the world. We need to recognize that this American reality is to our dishonor and to our peril. Because this is not, this is not, and this is not what a working mother looks like.
Temos que deixar de tragar a mentira das imaxes que nos amosan. Temos que deixar de aceptar a súa calma. Temos que cuestionar por que din que isto non pode funcionar cando vemos que funciona en todo o mundo. Temos que recoñecer que esta realidade americana é a nosa vergoña e o noso problema. Porque isto non é, isto non é e isto non é o aspecto dunha nai traballadora.
(Applause)
(Aplauso)