My journey to coming here today started in 1974. That's me with the funny gloves. I was 17 and going on a peace walk. What I didn't know though, was most of those people, standing there with me, were Moonies. (Laughter) And within a week I had come to believe that the second coming of Christ had occurred, that it was Sun Myung Moon, and that I had been specially chosen and prepared by God to be his disciple.
Moje putešestvije do ovog predavanja je započelo 1974. To sam ja sa smešnim rukavicama. Imala sam 17 godina i išla sam u šetnju mira. Ono što doduše nisam znala je to da je većina ljudi koje vidite na slici bila sledbenik Munijeve sekte. (smeh) Za samo nedelju dana poverovala sam da je došlo do drugog dolaska Hrista na Zemlju, u vidu lika Sana Mjung Muna, i da me je Bog odabrao i pripremio da budem njegov sledbenik.
Now as cool as that sounds, my family was not that thrilled with this. (Laughter) And they tried everything they could to get me out of there. There was an underground railroad of sorts that was going on during those years. Maybe some of you remember it. They were called deprogrammers. And after about five long years my family had me deprogrammed. And I then became a deprogrammer. I started going out on cases. And after about five years of doing this, I was arrested for kidnapping. Most of the cases I went out on were called involuntary. What happened was that the family had to get their loved ones some safe place somehow. And so they took them to some safe place. And we would come in and talk to them, usually for about a week. And so after this happened, I decided it was a good time to turn my back on this work.
Koliko god to dobro zvučalo, moja porodica nije bila oduševljena time. (smeh) Sve su pokušali kako bi me izvukli odatle, Postojala je podzemna mreža ljudi u tom periodu. Možda se neko od vas toga seća. Zvali smo ih reprogrameri. Nakon pet dugih godina moja porodica me je dekodirala. Nakon toga, i sama sam postala re-programer. Počela sam aktivno da radim sa ljudima. Bila sam uhapšena zbog otmice nakon pet godina rada. Mnogi slučajevi na kojima sam radila nisu bili dobrovoljni. Stvar je u tome što su porodice bile prinuđene da svoje voljene smeste nekako na sigurno mesto. Oni su ih odvodili na to sigurno mesto, a mi bismo odlazili tamo i pričali sa njima, obično oko nedelju dana. Kada se to desilo, shvatila sam da je bilo pravo vreme da prestanem time da se bavim.
And about 20 years went by. There was a burning question though that would not leave me. And that was, "How did this happen to me?" And in fact, what did happen to my brain? Because something did. And so I decided to write a book, a memoir, about this decade of my life.
Prošlo je od tad oko 20 godina. Jedno pitanje me je sve vreme proganjalo. Pitanje: "Kako se to meni desilo?" I šta se ustvari desilo sa mojim mozgom? Jer nešto se desilo. Tada sam odlučila da napišem knjigu, memoar o toj deceniji mog života.
And toward the end of writing that book there was a documentary that came out. It was on Jonestown. And it had a chilling effect on me. These are the dead in Jonestown. About 900 people died that day, most of them taking their own lives. Women gave poison to their babies, and watched foam come from their mouths as they died.
Kada sam bila pri kraju pisanja izašao je dokumentarni film. Film o Džonstaunu. Film me je zastrašio. Ovo su žrtve, mrtvi u Džonstounu. Tog dana je umrlo oko 900 ljudi, a većina je počinila samoubistvo. Žene su otrovale svoje bebe, i posmatrale su penu kako izlazi iz njihovih usta dok su umirale.
The top picture is a group of Moonies that have been blessed by their messiah. Their mates were chosen for them. The bottom picture is Hitler youth. This is the leg of a suicide bomber. The thing I had to admit to myself, with great repulsion, was that I get it. I understand how this could happen. I understand how someone's brain, how someone's mind can come to the place where it makes sense -- in fact it would be wrong, when your brain is working like that -- not to try to save the world through genocide.
Na gornjoj slici vidite grupu Munijevih sledbenika koje je njihov mesija blagoslovio. Njima su birani partneri. Donja slika je slika Hitlerove omladine. Ovo je noga bombaša-samoubice. Ono što mi je bilo jako teško da priznam je da ja to razumem. Shvatam kako je to moglo da se desi. Razumem kako nečiji mozak, kako nečiji um prihvata, i nalazi smisao u tome čak bi bilo i pogrešno, kada vam mozak na taj način radi, da ne pokušate da spasite svet putem genocida.
And so what is this? How does this work? And how I've come to view what happened to me is a viral, memetic infection. For those of you who aren't familiar with memetics, a meme has been defined as an idea that replicates in the human brain and moves from brain to brain like a virus, much like a virus. The way a virus works is -- it can infect and do the most damage to someone who has a compromised immune system.
Pa, šta je to? Kako to radi? Konačno sam shvatila da je ono što mi se desilo virusna, memetička infekcija. Za one kojima ideja o memima nije poznata, mem je određen kao ideja koja se umnožava u ljudskom mozgu i prenosi se od mozga do mozga kao virus, veoma slično virusima. Način na koji virus funkcioniše je takav da može da zarazi i nanese veliku štetu onima koji pate od oslabljenog imunog sistema.
In 1974, I was young, I was naive, and I was pretty lost in my world. I was really idealistic. These easy ideas to complex questions are very appealing when you are emotionally vulnerable. What happens is that circular logic takes over. "Moon is one with God. God is going to fix all the problems in the world. All I have to do is humbly follow. Because God is going to stop war and hunger -- all these things I wanted to do -- all I have to do is humbly follow. Because after all, God is [working through] the messiah. He's going to fix all this." It becomes impenetrable. And the most dangerous part of this is that is creates "us" and "them," "right" and "wrong," "good" and "evil." And it makes anything possible, makes anything rationalizable.
1974. ja sam bila mlada, bila sam naivna, i poprilično izgubljena u svom svetu. Bila sam pravi idealista. Ove jednostavne ideje koje nude odgovor na složena pitanja su veoma privlačne nekome ko je emotivno ranjiv. Tada prosto ta cirkulatorna logika preuzme kormilo. Mun i Bog su jedno. Bog će rešiti sve probleme u svetu. Ja samo treba ponizno da pratim. Jer Bog će rešiti problem ratova i gladi, sve te stvari koje sam ja želela da uradim, samo je trebalo da ponizno pratim. Naposletku, Bog obavlja svoja dela kroz mesiju. On će sve srediti. Postane neprobojan. Najopasnija stvar u tome je da stvara pojmove "mi" i "oni". "ispravno" i "pogrešno", "dobro" i "zlo". Sve se čini mogućim, sve možete racionalizovati.
And the thing is, though, if you looked at my brain during those years in the Moonies -- neuroscience is expanding exponentially, as Ray Kurzweil said yesterday. Science is expanding. We're beginning to look inside the brain. And so if you looked at my brain, or any brain that's infected with a viral memetic infection like this, and compared it to anyone in this room, or anyone who uses critical thinking on a regular basis, I am convinced it would look very, very different.
Mada da ste analizirali moj mozak u tim godima kada sam bila sledbenik Munija, neuronauka se razvija eksponencijalnom stopom, kao što je Rej Kurcvejl rekao juče. Nauka se širi. Počinjemo da sagledavamo mozak iznutra. Da ste analizirali moj mozak, ili bili čiji mozak koji je zaražen viralnim memima kao što je ova, i ukoliko biste to uporedili sa bilo kim u ovoj sali, ili bilo kim ko kritički rasuđuje na dnevnoj osnovi, sigurna sam da bi slike bile veoma, veoma različite.
And that, strange as it may sound, gives me hope. And the reason that gives me hope is that the first thing is to admit that we have a problem. But it's a human problem. It's a scientific problem, if you will. It happens in the human brain. There is no evil force out there to get us. And so this is something that, through research and education, I believe that we can solve. And so the first step is to realize that we can do this together, and that there is no "us" and "them." Thank you very much. (Applause)
I meni to, koliko god čudno zvučalo, pruža nadu. Pruža mi nadu iz razloga što je prvi korak da priznamo da imamo problem. To je problem ljudi. Možemo reći da je i naučni problem. Dešava se u ljudskom mozgu.Ne postoji zla sila tamo negde koja nas vreba. Verujem da ovaj problem uz pomoć istraživanja i obrazovanja možemo rešiti. Kao prvo treba da shvatimo da ovo možemo da uradimo zajedno, da ne postoji "mi" i "oni". Mnogo vam hvala. (aplauz)