Ladies and gentlemen, the history of music and television on the Internet in three minutes. A TED medley -- a TEDley.
各位先生,各位女士, 網路上的電視與音樂歷史 在三分鐘內完整呈現。 一個 TED 旋律。 一個「泰迪律」。
♫ It's nine o' clock on a Saturday ♫
♫ 一個星期六晚上的九點鐘 ♫
♫ The record store's closed for the night ♫
♫ 唱片行已經打烊了 ♫
♫ So I fire up the old iTunes music store ♫
♫ 所以我打開老梗的 iTunes 線上音樂商店 ♫
♫ And soon I am feelin' all right ♫
♫ 很快的我的心情就變好了 ♫
♫ I know Steve Jobs can find me a melody ♫
♫ 我知道史帝夫•喬布斯可以為我找到一首歌 ♫
♫ With one dollar pricing that rocks ♫
♫ 只要一美元卻超酷的歌 ♫
♫ I can type in the track and get album names back ♫
♫ 只需鍵入曲目,我就可以知道專輯名稱 ♫
♫ While still in my PJs and socks ♫
♫ 而我仍穿著睡衣和溫暖的襪子 ♫
♫ Sell us a song, you're the music man ♫
♫ 音樂人呀~賣我們歌吧~ ♫
♫ My iPod's still got 10 gigs to go ♫
♫ 我的 iPod 還有 10G 的空間 ♫
♫ Yes, we might prefer more compatibility ♫
♫ 是的,如果有更多相容性會更好 ♫
♫ But Steve likes to run the whole show ♫
♫ 但是史帝夫喜歡當老大 ♫
♫ I heard "Desperate Housewives" was great last night ♫
♫ 我聽說昨晚的慾望師奶影集很棒 ♫
♫ But I had a bad piece of cod ♫
♫ 但是我昨晚吃鱈魚排食物中毒了 ♫
♫ As I threw up my meal, I thought, "It's no big deal" ♫
♫ 當我昨晚在吐的時候,心想:「這沒什麼大不了」 ♫
♫ I'll watch it tonight on my 'Pod ♫
♫ 我今天晚上在我的 iPod 上面看就好了 ♫
♫ And now all of the networks are joining in ♫
♫ 現在所有電視網路的節目都可以收看 ♫
♫ Two bucks a show without ads ♫
♫ 一集兩美元還沒有廣告 ♫
♫ It's a business those guys always wanted to try ♫
♫ 這是那些傢伙一直都想做的生意 ♫
♫ But only Steve Jobs had the 'nads ♫
♫ 但是只有史帝夫•喬布斯夠屌 ♫
♫ They say we're young, don't watch TV ♫
♫ 他們說我們年輕人不看電視 ♫
♫ They say the Internet is all we see ♫
♫ 他們說網路就是我們的全部 ♫
♫ But that's not true; they've got it wrong ♫
♫ 但這不是事實,他們全都搞錯了 ♫
♫ See, all our shows are just two minutes long ♫
♫ 因為,我們看的節目都只有兩分鐘 ♫
♫ Hey ♫
♫ 嘿 ♫
♫ I got YouTube ♫
♫ 我有 YouTube ♫
♫ I got YouTube ♫
♫ 我有 YouTube ♫
And now, ladies and gentlemen, a tribute to the Recording Industry Association of America -- the RIAA!
現在,各位先生,各位女士... 向美國唱片業工會致敬, 有名的 RIAA!
♫ Young man, you were surfin' along ♫
♫ 年輕人,你獨自在上網 ♫
♫ And then, young man, you downloaded a song ♫
♫ 然後,年輕人,你下載了一首歌 ♫
♫ And then, dumb man, copied it to your 'Pod ♫
♫ 然後,笨蛋,把它複製到你的 iPod 中 ♫
♫ Then a phone call came to tell you ... ♫
♫ 然後你就接到了一通電話 ♫
♫ You've just been sued by the R-I-A-A ♫
♫ 你剛剛被 R~I~A~A 告了 ♫
♫ You've just been screwed by the R-I-A-A ♫
♫ 你剛剛被 R~I~A~A 搞了 ♫
♫ Their attorneys say you committed a crime ♫
♫ 他們的律師說你犯罪了 ♫
♫ And there'd better not be a next time ♫
♫ 最好別有下次 ♫
♫ They've lost their minds at the R-I-A-A ♫
♫ 在 R~I~A~A 他們都瘋了 ♫
♫ Justice is blind at the R-I-A-A ♫
♫ 在 R~I~A~A 正義是盲目的 ♫
♫ You're depriving the bands ♫
♫ 你在掠奪樂團 ♫
♫ You are learning to steal ♫
♫ 你正學會偷竊 ♫
♫ You can't do whatever you feel ♫
♫ 你不能隨心所欲 ♫
♫ CD sales have dropped every year ♫
♫ CD 銷售量逐年下降 ♫
♫ They're not greedy, they're just quaking with fear ♫
♫ 他們不貪心,他們只是怕得發抖 ♫
♫ Yes indeedy, what if their end is near ♫
♫ 是的,是真的,如果他們的末日近了 ♫
♫ And we download all our music ♫
♫ 然後我們可以任意下載他們的音樂 ♫
♫ Yeah, that would piss off the R-I-A-A ♫
♫ 是的,這會惹火了 R~I~A~A ♫
♫ No plastic discs from the R-I-A-A ♫
♫ 再也沒有從 R~I~A~A 來的塑膠碟片了 ♫
♫ What a way to make friends ♫
♫ 這真是一個交朋友的好方法 ♫
♫ It's a plan that can't fail ♫
♫ 絕不會失敗 ♫
♫ All your customers off to jail ♫
♫ 所有的客戶都進了監牢 ♫
♫ Who'll be next for the R-I-A-A? ♫
♫ R~I~A~A 下一個會找誰麻煩? ♫
♫ What else is vexing the R-I-A-A? ♫
♫ 什麼還會讓 R~I~A~A 傷腦筋? ♫
♫ Maybe whistling a tune ♫
♫ 也許吹口哨? ♫
♫ Maybe humming along ♫
♫ 也許哼首歌? ♫
♫ Maybe mocking 'em in a song ♫
♫ 或許在歌裡嘲諷他們? ♫