So I was born on the last day of the last year of the '70s. I was raised on "Free to be you and me" -- (cheering) hip-hop -- not as many woohoos for hip-hop in the house. Thank you. Thank you for hip-hop -- and Anita Hill. (Cheering) My parents were radicals -- (Laughter) who became, well, grown-ups. My dad facetiously says, "We wanted to save the world, and instead we just got rich." We actually just got "middle class" in Colorado Springs, Colorado, but you get the picture. I was raised with a very heavy sense of unfinished legacy.
Rođena sam na zadnji dan zadnje godine sedamdesetih. Odrasla sam uz "Slobodni da budemo ti i ja", (Ovacije) hip-hop. Nema baš puno fanova hip-hopa ovde. Hvala. Hvala za hip-hop. I Anitu Hil. (Ovacije) Moji roditelji su bili radikali. (Smeh) koji su, pa, odrasli. Moj tata je šaljivo rekao: "Hteli smo da spasemo svet, a umesto toga, samo smo se obogatili." Zapravo smo samo postali srednja klasa, u Kolorado Springsu u Koloradu, ali razumete šta hoću da kažem. Odgojena sam uz dubok osećaj nedovršenog nasleđa.
At this ripe old age of 30, I've been thinking a lot about what it means to grow up in this horrible, beautiful time, and I've decided, for me, it's been a real journey and paradox. The first paradox is that growing up is about rejecting the past and then promptly reclaiming it. Feminism was the water I grew up in. When I was just a little girl, my mom started what is now the longest-running women's film festival in the world. So while other kids were watching sitcoms and cartoons, I was watching very esoteric documentaries made by and about women. You can see how this had an influence. But she was not the only feminist in the house.
Sa svojih zrelih 30 mnogo razmišljam o tome šta znači odrastati u ovom užasnom i prelepom vremenu, i zaključila sam da je za mene to bilo jedno pravo putovanje i paradoks. Prvi paradoks je da se odrastanje vrti oko odbacivanja prošlosti i njegovog naknadnog i brzog prihvatanja. Ja sam odrasla u feminističkim vodama. Kada sam bila mala, moja mama je započela ono što je sada najstariji ženski filmski festival u celom svetu. Dok su ostala deca gledala komedije i crtaće, ja sam gledala konfuzne dokumentarce o ženama koje su pravile same žene. Možete da vidite da je ovo imalo uticaja na mene. Ali ona nije bila jedina feministkinja u kući.
My dad actually resigned from the male-only business club in my hometown because he said he would never be part of an organization that would one day welcome his son, but not his daughter. (Applause) He's actually here today. (Applause) The trick here is my brother would become an experimental poet, not a businessman, but the intention was really good.
Moj tata je dao otkaz u poslovnom klubu za muškarce u mom rodnom gradu jer je rekao kako nikada neće bio deo organizacije koja će jednog dana primiti njegovog sina, ali ne i ćerku. (Aplauz) On je danas ovde. (Aplauz) Kvaka je u tome da je moj brat kasnije postao eksperimentalni pesnik a ne biznismen, ali očeve namere su bile jako dobre.
(Laughter)
(Smeh)
In any case, I didn't readily claim the feminist label, even though it was all around me, because I associated it with my mom's women's groups, her swishy skirts and her shoulder pads -- none of which had much cachet in the hallways of Palmer High School where I was trying to be cool at the time. But I suspected there was something really important about this whole feminism thing, so I started covertly tiptoeing into my mom's bookshelves and picking books off and reading them -- never, of course, admitting that I was doing so. I didn't actually claim the feminist label until I went to Barnard College and I heard Amy Richards and Jennifer Baumgardner speak for the first time. They were the co-authors of a book called "Manifesta." So what very profound epiphany, you might ask, was responsible for my feminist click moment? Fishnet stockings. Jennifer Baumgardner was wearing them. I thought they were really hot. I decided, okay, I can claim the feminist label. Now I tell you this -- I tell you this at the risk of embarrassing myself, because I think part of the work of feminism is to admit that aesthetics, that beauty, that fun do matter. There are lots of very modern political movements that have caught fire in no small part because of cultural hipness. Anyone heard of these two guys as an example?
Uglavnom, nisam odmah prihvatila femizam iako je bio svuda oko mene jer sam ga povezivala sa maminom ženskom grupom, lepršavim suknjama i naramenicama i ništa od toga nije imalo zeleno svetlo u hodnicima Srednje škole Palmer gde sam u to vreme pokušavala da budem kul. Ali slutila sam da je postojalo nešto jako bitno u celoj toj feminističkoj stvari pa sam počela da se krišom motam oko maminih polica s knjigama, biram i čitam knjige sa njih i pritom nikada to nisam priznala. Zapravo, nisam se prozvala feministkinjom dok nisam otišla na koledž Barnard gde sam čula govore Ejmi Ričards i Dženifer Baumgardner po prvi put. Zajedno su napisale knjigu "Manifesta". Možda se pitate koje duboko otkrovenje je upalilo feminističku iskru u meni. To su bile mrežaste dokolenice. Dženifer Baumgardner ih je nosila. Mislila sam da su bile seksi. Zaključila sam da bih mogla da se proglasim feministkinjom. Ovo vam govorim uz rizik da ću se osramotiti jer mislim da je deo feminističkog pokreta i priznanje da su estetika, lepota i zabava bitni. Postoji mnogo modernih političkih pokreta koji su se probili u velikoj meri zahvaljujući tome što promovišu trendove. Da li je iko čuo za ovu dvojicu kao jedan od primera?
So my feminism is very indebted to my mom's, but it looks very different. My mom says, "patriarchy." I say, "intersectionality." So race, class, gender, ability, all of these things go into our experiences of what it means to be a woman. Pay equity? Yes. Absolutely a feminist issue. But for me, so is immigration. (Applause) Thank you. My mom says, "Protest march." I say, "Online organizing." I co-edit, along with a collective of other super-smart, amazing women, a site called Feministing.com. We are the most widely read feminist publication ever, and I tell you this because I think it's really important to see that there's a continuum.
Svoj feminizam dugujem majci, ali on izgleda veoma drugačije. Moja mama kaže "patrijarhat", ja kažem "intersekcionalnost". Rasa, klasa, rod, sposobnosti - sve to sačinjava naše iskustvo onoga šta znači biti žena. Jednake plate? To je apsolutno feminističko pitanje. Ali za mene je i imigracija. (Aplauz) Hvala. Moja mama kaže "protestni marš", ja kažem "onlajn organizacija". U timu iznimno pametnih i neverovatnih žena uređujem sajt po imenu "Feministing.com". Mi smo najčitanija feministička publikacija u istoriji i ovo vam govorim jer mislim da je jako bitno videti da ovde postoji kontinuum.
Feminist blogging is basically the 21st century version of consciousness raising. But we also have a straightforward political impact. Feministing has been able to get merchandise pulled off the shelves of Walmart. We got a misogynist administrator sending us hate-mail fired from a Big Ten school. And one of our biggest successes is we get mail from teenage girls in the middle of Iowa who say, "I Googled Jessica Simpson and stumbled on your site. I realized feminism wasn't about man-hating and Birkenstocks." So we're able to pull in the next generation in a totally new way.
Feminističko blogovanje je metod podizanja svesti u 21. veku. Ali mi imamo i direktan politički uticaj. Naš sajt je uspeo da skloni robu sa polica Volmarta. Izvojevali smo da se mizoginistički administrator koji nam je slao negativne mejlove otpusti iz škole "Big Ten". A naš najveći uspeh je kada dobijemo poštu od tinejdžerki u sred Ajove koje kažu: "Uguglala sam Džesiku Simpson i naletela na vaš sajt. Shvatila sam da se feminizam ne vrti oko mržnje prema muškarcima i anatomske obuće." Uspeli smo da usmerimo novu generaciju
My mom says, "Gloria Steinem." I say, "Samhita Mukhopadhyay, Miriam Perez, Ann Friedman, Jessica Valenti, Vanessa Valenti, and on and on and on and on." We don't want one hero. We don't want one icon. We don't want one face. We are thousands of women and men across this country doing online writing, community organizing, changing institutions from the inside out -- all continuing the incredible work that our mothers and grandmothers started. Thank you.
u jedan sasvim novi smer. Moja mama kaže "Glorija Stajnem", a ja kažem "Samita Mukopadej, Miriam Perez, En Fridmen, Džesika Valenti, Vanesa Valenti, i tako dalje." Mi ne želimo jednog heroja. Ne želimo jednu ikonu. Ne želimo jedno lice. Mi smo na hiljade žena i muškaraca koji širom ove zemlje pišemo za sajtove, organizujemo zajednice, menjamo ustanove iznutra. Svi mi nastavljamo neverovatan rad koji su započele naše majke i bake. Hvala.
(Applause)
(Aplauz)
Which brings me to the second paradox: sobering up about our smallness and maintaining faith in our greatness all at once. Many in my generation -- because of well-intentioned parenting and self-esteem education -- were socialized to believe that we were special little snowflakes -- (Laughter) who were going to go out and save the world. These are three words many of us were raised with. We walk across graduation stages, high on our overblown expectations, and when we float back down to earth, we realize we don't know what the heck it means to actually save the world anyway. The mainstream media often paints my generation as apathetic, and I think it's much more accurate to say we are deeply overwhelmed. And there's a lot to be overwhelmed about, to be fair -- an environmental crisis, wealth disparity in this country unlike we've seen since 1928, and globally, a totally immoral and ongoing wealth disparity. Xenophobia's on the rise. The trafficking of women and girls. It's enough to make you feel very overwhelmed.
Što me dovodi do drugog paradoksa: osveštenje o tome kako smo mali i održavanje vere u našu veličinu u isto vreme. Zbog dobronamernog roditeljstva i obrazovanja o samopoštovanju mnoge iz moje generacije je društvo nagnalo da veruju da smo mi male posebne pahulje - (Smeh) koje će da spasu svet. Ovo su tri reči uz koje su mnogi od nas odgojeni. Uzimamo svoje diplome na krilima velikih očekivanja, a kada se spustimo na zemlju, shvatamo da nemamo blage veze šta uopšte znači spasiti svet. Mejnstrim mediji često oslikavaju moju generaciju kao nezainteresovanu, ali ja mislim da je preciznije reći da smo paralizovani. I to s razlogom, da budem iskrena. Zbog ekoloških kriza, nejednakosti u bogatstvu u ovoj zemlji koja je veća od one iz 1928. i koja je globalno apsolutno nemoralna i sveprisutna. Ksenofobija je u porastu. Trgovina ženama i devojčicama. Sve je to dovoljno da budemo itekako paralizovani.
I experienced this firsthand myself when I graduated from Barnard College in 2002. I was fired up; I was ready to make a difference. I went out and I worked at a non-profit, I went to grad school, I phone-banked, I protested, I volunteered, and none of it seemed to matter. And on a particularly dark night of December of 2004, I sat down with my family, and I said that I had become very disillusioned. I admitted that I'd actually had a fantasy -- kind of a dark fantasy -- of writing a letter about everything that was wrong with the world and then lighting myself on fire on the White House steps. My mom took a drink of her signature Sea Breeze, her eyes really welled with tears, and she looked right at me and she said, "I will not stand for your desperation." She said, "You are smarter, more creative and more resilient than that."
Ja sam ovo iskusila iz prve ruke kada sam diplomirala sa koledža Barnard 2002. Bila sam živa vatra. Htela sam da uvedem promene. Radila sam bez naknade, otišla sam na postdiplomski, protestovala sam, volontirala sam, ali činilo se da to nije ništa značilo. Jedne posebno mračne noći, u decembru 2004. sela sam sa svojom porodicom i rekla im da sam se jako demoralisala. Priznala sam da sam zapravo imala mračnu maštariju o tome da napišem pismo o svemu što je loše u svetu i onda se zapalim na pragu Bele kuće. Moja mama je otpila gutljaj svog omiljenog koktela i očima punim suza pogledala me pravo u oči i rekla: "Neću podržati tvoj očaj." Rekla je: "Ti si pametnija, kreativnija i jača od toga".
Which brings me to my third paradox. Growing up is about aiming to succeed wildly and being fulfilled by failing really well. (Laughter) (Applause) There's a writer I've been deeply influenced by, Parker Palmer, and he writes that many of us are often whiplashed "between arrogant overestimation of ourselves and a servile underestimation of ourselves." You may have guessed by now, I did not light myself on fire. I did what I know to do in desperation, which is write. I wrote the book I needed to read. I wrote a book about eight incredible people all over this country doing social justice work. I wrote about Nia Martin-Robinson, the daughter of Detroit and two civil rights activists, who's dedicating her life to environmental justice. I wrote about Emily Apt who initially became a caseworker in the welfare system because she decided that was the most noble thing she could do, but quickly learned, not only did she not like it, but she wasn't really good at it. Instead, what she really wanted to do was make films. So she made a film about the welfare system and had a huge impact. I wrote about Maricela Guzman, the daughter of Mexican immigrants, who joined the military so she could afford college. She was actually sexually assaulted in boot camp and went on to co-organize a group called the Service Women's Action Network.
Što me dovodi do trećeg paradoksa. Odrastanje se vrti oko cilja za divljim uspehom i osećaja ispunjenosti kada dobro omanete. (Smeh) (Aplauz) Postoji pisac koji je duboko uticao na mene, Parker Palmer, i on piše kako smo često razapeti "između arogantnog kompleksa više vrednosti i pokornog potcenjivanja." Do sada ste sigurno sami zaključili da se nisam zapalila. U periodima očaja, radim ono što znam, a to je pisanje. Napisala sam knjigu koju sam morala da pročitam. Napisala sam knjigu o osmoro divnih ljudi koji po celoj ovoj zemlji zadovoljavaju društvenu pravdu. Pisala sam o Niji Martin-Robinson, ćerki Detroita i dvoje aktivista za ljudska prava koja je posvetila svoj život borbi za ekološku pravdu. Pisala sam o Emili Ept koja je postala savetnik u službi za socijalnu pomoć jer je zaključila da je to najplemenitija stvar koju je mogla da radi. Ubrzo je saznala ne samo da joj se to nije svidelo nego da nije bila dobra u tome. Ono što je stvarno htela je da snima filmove. Snimila je film o sistemu za socijalnu pomoć i ostavila je time veliki trag. Pisala sam o Mariseli Guzman, ćerki meksičkih imigranata koja se priključila vojsci kako bi mogla da priušti školovanje. U kampu je bila seksualno zlostavljana i onda je bila jedna od organizatora grupe po imenu Mreža akcije žena.
What I learned from these people and others was that I couldn't judge them based on their failure to meet their very lofty goals. Many of them are working in deeply intractable systems -- the military, congress, the education system, etc. But what they managed to do within those systems was be a humanizing force. And at the end of the day, what could possibly be more important than that? Cornel West says, "Of course it's a failure. But how good a failure is it?" This isn't to say we give up our wildest, biggest dreams. It's to say we operate on two levels. On one, we really go after changing these broken systems of which we find ourselves a part. But on the other, we root our self-esteem in the daily acts of trying to make one person's day more kind, more just, etc.
Ono što su me ovi i drugi ljudi naučili je to da ne mogu da ih sudim na osnovu njihovog neuspeha u ostvarenju nekih visokih ciljeva. Mnogi od njih rade u rigidnim sistemima: vojsci, Kongresu, prosveti, itd. Ono što su oni uspeli da unesu u te sisteme je ljudskost. Na kraju krajeva, ima li išta važnije od toga? Kornel Vest kaže: "Naravno da je to neuspeh. Ali koliko je dobar taj neuspeh?" Ne kažem da treba da odustanemo od naših najluđih snova, nego da treba da delujemo na dva nivoa. Na prvom stvarno pokušavamo da promenimo ove falične sisteme čiji smo deo i mi sami. Na drugom, mi temeljimo naše samopoštovanje u svakodnevnim radnjama kojima pokušavamo da učinimo nečiji dan lepšim, pravednijim, itd.
So when I was a little girl, I had a couple of very strange habits. One of them was I used to lie on the kitchen floor of my childhood home, and I would suck the thumb of my left hand and hold my mom's cold toes with my right hand. (Laughter) I was listening to her talk on the phone, which she did a lot. She was talking about board meetings, she was founding peace organizations, she was coordinating carpools, she was consoling friends -- all these daily acts of care and creativity. And surely, at three and four years old, I was listening to the soothing sound of her voice, but I think I was also getting my first lesson in activist work.
Kada sam bila mala, imala sam par jako čudnih navika. Jedna od njih je ta da sam imala običaj da ležim na podu kuhinje u svojoj kući, sisam palac leve šake a desnom rukom se držim za mamine hladne prste na nogama. (Smeh) Slušala sam je kako priča na telefon, a to je radila često. Pričala bi o sastancima odbora, osnivala je mirovne organizacije, koordinirala je putovanja, tešila prijatelje - radila je sve ove svakodnevne aktivnosti bržnosti i kreativnosti. Naravno, sa tri godine ja sam slušala njen umirujući glas, ali mislim da sam takođe dobila svoju prvu lekciju iz aktivizma.
The activists I interviewed had nothing in common, literally, except for one thing, which was that they all cited their mothers as their most looming and important activist influences. So often, particularly at a young age, we look far afield for our models of the meaningful life, and sometimes they're in our own kitchens, talking on the phone, making us dinner, doing all that keeps the world going around and around. My mom and so many women like her have taught me that life is not about glory, or certainty, or security even. It's about embracing the paradox. It's about acting in the face of overwhelm. And it's about loving people really well. And at the end of the day, these things make for a lifetime of challenge and reward.
Aktivisti koje sam intervjuisala nisu imali ništa zajedničko osim doslovno jedne stvari. Svi su naveli svoje majke kao najsvetliji i najvažniji uticaj u svom aktivizmu. Često, pogotovo u ranoj dobi gledamo u daljinu ne bismo li pronašli modele značaja u životu i ponekad su oni u našoj kuhinji, gde pričaju na telefon, kuvaju nam večeru i rade sve ono što održava svet u pokretu. Moja mama i mnogo žena poput nje su me naučile da se život ne vrti oko slave, ili izvesnosti ili čak sigurnosti. Vrti se oko prihvatanja paradoksa, oko vašeg delovanja uprkos paralisanosti, oko pružanja ljubavi na pravi način. Na kraju krajeva, ove stvari čine da je vaš celi život pun izazova i nagrada.
Thank you.
Hvala.
(Applause)
(Aplauz)