So my moment of truth did not come all at once. In 2010, I had the chance to be considered for promotion from my job as director of policy planning at the U.S. State Department. This was my moment to lean in, to push myself forward for what are really only a handful of the very top foreign policy jobs, and I had just finished a big, 18-month project for Secretary Clinton, successfully, and I knew I could handle a bigger job.
我的人生轉捩點,並沒有一次全部發生 在2010年,我很榮幸被提名為 美國國務院的政策計劃主任 這是我該挺身而進的時刻 讓我向前跨一大步 因為這是千載難逢的頂尖外交政策工作 我才剛為國務卿柯林頓女士 順利完成一項18個月的大型專案 我知道我可以勝任更重大的工作
The woman I thought I was would have said yes. But I had been commuting for two years between Washington and Princeton, New Jersey, where my husband and my two teenage sons lived, and it was not going well. I tried on the idea of eking out another two years in Washington, or maybe uprooting my sons from their school and my husband from his work and asking them to join me. But deep down, I knew that the right decision was to go home, even if I didn't fully recognize the woman who was making that choice.
要是以前的我一定會說「好!」 可是,我在過去兩年經常在 華盛頓州和紐澤西州兩地往返 由於我先生和兩個十歲的兒子住在那裏 而這件事進展的不是很順利 我想要擠出兩年的時間在華盛頓工作 或是把我兒子和丈夫 從他們的學校及公司遷移至此 請求他們和我一起努力 在我心深處,其實我知道 回家才是正確的決定 即便我發現我已經 無法認識那個做決定的我了 這是個基於愛與責任的決定
That was a decision based on love and responsibility. I couldn't keep watching my oldest son make bad choices without being able to be there for him when and if he needed me. But the real change came more gradually. Over the next year, while my family was righting itself, I started to realize that even if I could go back into government, I didn't want to. I didn't want to miss the last five years that my sons were at home. I finally allowed myself to accept what was really most important to me, not what I was conditioned to want or maybe what I conditioned myself to want, and that decision led to a reassessment of the feminist narrative that I grew up with and have always championed.
我無法看著我大兒子一直做錯誤的決定 而我卻在他需要我的時候不在他的身邊 然而真正的改變卻慢慢地顯現出來 事隔了一年 家人的生活步調慢慢走上軌道 我才發現 即便我可以回到政府工作 而我卻不想 我不想錯過過去五年 在家裡陪兒子的那段時間 我終於能讓自己去接受 對我來說什麼才是最重要的事 而不是決定自己想要的事 或是習慣自己所做的決定 這樣的決定讓我重新評估 那伴隨並支持我成長的女權故事 我也一直把它奉為圭臬
I am still completely committed to the cause of male-female equality, but let's think about what that equality really means, and how best to achieve it. I always accepted the idea that the most respected and powerful people in our society are men at the top of their careers, so that the measure of male-female equality ought to be how many women are in those positions: prime ministers, presidents, CEOs, directors, managers, Nobel laureates, leaders. I still think we should do everything we possibly can to achieve that goal. But that's only half of real equality, and I now think we're never going to get there unless we recognize the other half. I suggest that real equality, full equality, does not just mean valuing women on male terms. It means creating a much wider range of equally respected choices for women and for men. And to get there, we have to change our workplaces, our policies and our culture.
至今我仍完全信奉著性別平等的理想 但讓我們先來思考平等究竟意味著什麼 以及如何盡可能實現它 我總是相信著一種想法 那就是最受尊敬及有權力的人 在社會上都是位於高階職位的男性 所以在衡量男女平等這事情上 照理是探討多少女性人在高階職位上 像是首相、總裁、高階經理 部長、經理人、諾貝爾獎得主、領導者 我們仍然覺得應該努力去實現那個目標 但這只是平等的一半而已 我現在認為這永遠無法實現 除非我們能了解剩下另一半 我覺得真正的平等 完全的平等 不代表我們用男性的標準 去實現那個目標 這代表要創造出更廣義的觀點 來看待並尊重男女之間的平等選擇 要達成這樣的目標,我們必須改善工作規範 制度以及文化 就工作場所而言
In the workplace, real equality means valuing family just as much as work, and understanding that the two reinforce each other. As a leader and as a manager, I have always acted on the mantra, if family comes first, work does not come second -- life comes together. If you work for me, and you have a family issue, I expect you to attend to it, and I am confident, and my confidence has always been borne out, that the work will get done, and done better. Workers who have a reason to get home to care for their children or their family members are more focused, more efficient, more results-focused. And breadwinners who are also caregivers have a much wider range of experiences and contacts. Think about a lawyer who spends part of his time at school events for his kids talking to other parents. He's much more likely to bring in new clients for his firm than a lawyer who never leaves his office. And caregiving itself develops patience -- a lot of patience -- and empathy, creativity, resilience, adaptability. Those are all attributes that are ever more important in a high-speed, horizontal, networked global economy.
真正的平等代表重視家庭 等同於重視工作 並且懂得這兩者相輔相成 身為領導人及經理人 我身體力行這句名言 如果家庭是第一順位,那工作就不是其次 生活本身兩者兼顧 如果你為我工作,而你有家庭問題 我希望你能照顧好家庭 這一點我很有把握 事實上每次都能驗證 工作不只會做得好,還會越做越好 勞工若有充分的理由 需要回家照顧孩子跟家人 能擁有更高的專注力及工作效率 也更重視工作的成果 如養家餬口的人同時身兼照顧者 擁有更多的經驗和人脈 試想有位律師花時間參加孩子學校的活動 同時也可以和其他家長交談 比起從未離開辦公室的律師能帶來更多客戶 而看護者的工作性質需要耐心 非常多的耐心 以及同理心、創造力、韌性、適應力 這些特質對高速化、平行化、 網路化的全球經濟更加重要 頂尖的公司都知道這些特質
The best companies actually know this. The companies that win awards for workplace flexibility in the United States include some of our most successful corporations, and a 2008 national study on the changing workforce showed that employees in flexible and effective workplaces are more engaged with their work, they're more satisfied and more loyal, they have lower levels of stress and higher levels of mental health. And a 2012 study of employers showed that deep, flexible practices actually lowered operating costs and increased adaptability in a global service economy.
曾因彈性工作環境得獎過的美國公司 有些還是最成功的企業 以及一份2008年 針對改變工作環境的調查 都顯示出員工在彈性 且有效率的工作環境下更加投入 也有更高的滿意度及忠誠度 壓力程度較低 心理也比較健康 2012年一項對於員工所做的研究 顯示出有高度彈性的作法 其實可以降低營運成本 在全球服務經濟體下更可以增進適應力 你也許會覺得只有在美國 會有工作家庭失衡的問題
So you may think that the privileging of work over family is only an American problem. Sadly, though, the obsession with work is no longer a uniquely American disease. Twenty years ago, when my family first started going to Italy, we used to luxuriate in the culture of siesta. Siesta is not just about avoiding the heat of the day. It's actually just as much about embracing the warmth of a family lunch. Now, when we go, fewer and fewer businesses close for siesta, reflecting the advance of global corporations and 24-hour competition. So making a place for those we love is actually a global imperative.
可惜的是,現在不只是美國人才會有這種問題 20年前,我帶家人第一次去義大利 我們享受當地午睡的文化 午睡的習慣不只是躲避中午的熱氣 這帶來的意義等同於家庭聚餐的溫暖 現在當我們又拜訪當地,已經沒有那麼多商店 有午休的時間了 這反映出國際企業的發展 和高度競爭環境中 所以,為我們所愛的人挪出點時間 其實是全世界都迫切需要的
In policy terms, real equality means recognizing that the work that women have traditionally done is just as important as the work that men have traditionally done, no matter who does it. Think about it: Breadwinning and caregiving are equally necessary for human survival. At least if we get beyond a barter economy, somebody has to earn an income and someone else has to convert that income to care and sustenance for loved ones.
就政策面來說 真正的平等代表著要意識到 女性一直以來所做的工作 跟男性一直以來的工作是一樣重要的 不論是誰做的 試想:養家糊口和照顧家人對於生存一樣重要 至少不在以物易物的經濟體系下 有人必須要賺到收入 其他家人就必須轉換該收入 用來照顧和供給他們所愛的家人 大部分人聽到我說養家糊口和照顧家人
Now most of you, when you hear me talk about breadwinning and caregiving, instinctively translate those categories into men's work and women's work. And we don't typically challenge why men's work is advantaged. But consider a same-sex couple like my friends Sarah and Emily. They're psychiatrists. They got married five years ago, and now they have two-year-old twins. They love being mothers, but they also love their work, and they're really good at what they do. So how are they going to divide up breadwinning and caregiving responsibilities? Should one of them stop working or reduce hours to be home? Or should they both change their practices so they can have much more flexible schedules? And what criteria should they use to make that decision? Is it who makes the most money or who is most committed to her career? Or who has the most flexible boss?
就會直接聯想成男性和女性的工作 而我們通常不會質疑 為什麼男人的工作較具優勢 如果是同性的情侶 像是我的朋友莎拉和艾蜜莉 他們都是精神科醫生 他們五年前結婚 現在有對兩歲的雙胞胎 他們都喜歡當媽媽,也喜歡他們的工作 他們也很擅長於自己的工作 所以他們要怎麼分配 養家糊口和照顧小孩的責任呢? 是否該有任何一方停止工作 或是降低工作時數待在家呢? 或著是雙方改變工作習慣 才能擁有更彈性的時間呢? 而又需要用哪種準則 才能讓他們做出決定呢? 應該是賺最多錢的人 還是最投入工作的人呢? 或者是誰的上司最隨和?
The same-sex perspective helps us see that juggling work and family are not women's problems, they're family problems. And Sarah and Emily are the lucky ones, because they have a choice about how much they want to work. Millions of men and women have to be both breadwinners and caregivers just to earn the income they need, and many of those workers are scrambling. They're patching together care arrangements that are inadequate and often actually unsafe. If breadwinning and caregiving are really equal, then why shouldn't a government invest as much in an infrastructure of care as the foundation of a healthy society as it invests in physical infrastructure as the backbone of a successful economy?
用同性婚姻的觀點可以讓我們看到 應付工作及家人 不只是女性的問題而已 這應該是家庭的問題 而莎拉和艾蜜莉是幸運的情侶 因為他們可以決定 他們有多想要投入工作 數百萬的男女 都需要身兼賺錢養家及照顧家人的角色 這樣才能賺到所需的薪水 而很多勞工覺得很困擾 他們拼湊起托育的安排 有些安排不恰當 常常有些安排很危險 假使賺錢養家跟照顧孩子一樣的重要 那我們的政府為什麼投入社會福利基金 用來照顧人們的健康 無法跟經濟支柱的實體建設一樣多? 懂得這一點的政府
The governments that get it -- no surprises here -- the governments that get it, Norway, Sweden, Denmark, the Netherlands, provide universal child care, support for caregivers at home, school and early childhood education, protections for pregnant women, and care for the elderly and the disabled. Those governments invest in that infrastructure the same way they invest in roads and bridges and tunnels and trains. Those societies also show you that breadwinning and caregiving reinforce each other. They routinely rank among the top 15 countries of the most globally competitive economies, but at the same time, they rank very high on the OECD Better Life Index. In fact, they rank higher than other governments, like my own, the U.S., or Switzerland, that have higher average levels of income but lower rankings on work-life balance.
其實你們都猜的到 這些政府分別是 挪威、瑞典、丹麥及荷蘭 都提供全面性的托育制度 政府支持在家和學校托育以及幼兒教育 保護懷孕婦女 照顧老年仁及身殘者 這些政府投資這種基礎建設 和他們投資在道路、橋墩 隧道和火車的錢一樣多 這些社會也讓你看到 賺錢養家和照顧家人是相輔相成的 這些國家通常是最具經濟競爭力的前15名 不過同時 他們在OECD美好生活指數中也名列前茅 事實上,比起其他政府,像是我的國家美國 或是瑞士的名次都還要來得高 這些國家平均收入水平頗高 不過在工作與生活的平衡上做得不好 所以改變我們的工作環境
So changing our workplaces and building infrastructures of care would make a big difference, but we're not going to get equally valued choices unless we change our culture, and the kind of cultural change required means re-socializing men. (Applause) Increasingly in developed countries, women are socialized to believe that our place is no longer only in the home, but men are actually still where they always were. Men are still socialized to believe that they have to be breadwinners, that to derive their self-worth from how high they can climb over other men on a career ladder. The feminist revolution still has a long way to go. It's certainly not complete. But 60 years after "The Feminine Mystique" was published, many women actually have more choices than men do. We can decide to be a breadwinner, a caregiver, or any combination of the two. When a man, on the other hand, decides to be a caregiver, he puts his manhood on the line. His friends may praise his decision, but underneath, they're scratching their heads. Isn't the measure of a man his willingness to compete with other men for power and prestige? And as many women hold that view as men do. We know that lots of women still judge the attractiveness of a man based in large part on how successful he is in his career. A woman can drop out of the work force and still be an attractive partner. For a man, that's a risky proposition. So as parents and partners, we should be socializing our sons and our husbands to be whatever they want to be, either caregivers or breadwinners. We should be socializing them to make caregiving cool for guys. (Applause)
並且建立起照護基礎建設 就可以帶來改變 要是我們沒有先改變自己的文化 就無法平等取得有價值的選擇 而所謂的文化改變需要 就是讓男性再度社會化 (掌聲) 在已開發國家 社會中的女性相信自己 不再只會待在家而已 而男性卻還待在原處 社會中的男性深信他們需要養家賺錢 他們的自我價值取決於職場上的升遷 女性主義的革命還有一大段路要努力 它顯然尚未完成 在《女性的奧秘》一書出版六十年後 很多女性其實比起男性擁有更多的選擇 我們可以選擇當養家賺錢的人 照顧孩子的人,或是兩者皆是 另一方面 如果男性選擇照顧孩子 他的男子氣概就岌岌可危了 他的朋友可能會稱讚他的決定 但暗地裡卻不以為然 我們看待男性的標準 不就是男性間互相競爭取得權力和聲望嗎? 越來越多女性也有這樣的觀點 我們知道許多女性 仍然把男性的吸引力的標準 放在職場上的成就 女性可以輕易離開職場 卻還是充滿吸引力的伴侶 對男性而言這是很冒險的作法 我身為家長也是工作夥伴 我們應該讓我們的兒子和丈夫變得更社會化 讓他們成為想要的角色 不論是養家賺錢或是照顧孩子的人 我們應該告訴他們照顧孩子是很酷的事 (掌聲) 我知道你們會覺得「不可能」
I can almost hear lots of you thinking, "No way." But in fact, the change is actually already happening. At least in the United States, lots of men take pride in cooking, and frankly obsess over stoves. They are in the birthing rooms. They take paternity leave when they can. They can walk a baby or soothe a toddler just as well as their wives can, and they are increasingly doing much more of the housework. Indeed, there are male college students now who are starting to say, "I want to be a stay-at-home dad." That was completely unthinkable 50 or even 30 years ago. And in Norway, where men have an automatic three month's paternity leave, but they lose it if they decide not to take it, a high government official told me that companies are starting to look at prospective male employees and raise an eyebrow if they didn't in fact take their leave when they had kids. That means that it's starting to seem like a character defect not to want to be a fully engaged father.
事實上,這樣的改變真的在發生 至少在美國 很多男性對於烹飪引以為傲 甚至對爐子很著迷 有些男性會去產房 盡量爭取陪產假 他們會帶小寶寶散步或是安撫學步的孩子 跟他們的太太一樣厲害 這些男性做的家事也越來越多了 事實上,現在有很多男大學生 開始想要當「家庭主夫」 這種事情在50年前甚至是30年前 都無法絕對想像 在挪威,男性正常就有三個月的陪產假 如果不想放陪產假,這假期就會消失 一位高階政府官員告訴我 公司會開始關注有潛力的男性員工 並且質疑這些不願意放假陪小孩的男員工 這代表說無法完全投入當爸爸的員工 是被視為有個性缺陷
So I was raised to believe that championing women's rights meant doing everything we could to get women to the top. And I still hope that I live long enough to see men and women equally represented at all levels of the work force. But I've come to believe that we have to value family every bit as much as we value work, and that we should entertain the idea that doing right by those we love will make all of us better at everything we do.
我從小就相信 倡導女性的權力 就是要我們竭盡所能 讓女性站在最高處 我仍希望我能活得夠老 才能看到男女在職場上取得平等地位 我也相信我們對家庭的重視不亞於我們對工作的重視 我們也應該懷抱著一個想法 為我們所愛的人做正確的事 會讓我們所有事情做得更好
Thirty years ago, Carol Gilligan, a wonderful psychologist, studied adolescent girls and identified an ethic of care, an element of human nature every bit as important as the ethic of justice. It turns out that "you don't care" is just as much a part of who we are as "that's not fair." Bill Gates agrees. He argues that the two great forces of human nature are self-interest and caring for others. Let's bring them both together. Let's make the feminist revolution a humanist revolution. As whole human beings, we will be better caregivers and breadwinners. You may think that can't happen, but I grew up in a society where my mother put out small vases of cigarettes for dinner parties, where blacks and whites used separate bathrooms, and where everybody claimed to be heterosexual. Today, not so much. The revolution for human equality can happen. It is happening. It will happen. How far and how fast is up to us.
30年前,一位傑出心理學家 卡羅爾·吉利根研究青春期少女 並且發現關懷倫理 這種人性的特質就跟正義一樣的重要 原來「漠不關心」 其實就跟我們覺得「這不公平」一樣的重要 比爾蓋茲也這麼認為 他覺得這兩種強大的人性 是自我主義同時也關懷他人 讓我們將這兩種天性結合在一起 讓我們將女權革命變成人類革命 全人類都會變成更好的照顧者以及養家的人 你可能會覺得這無法實現 但是在我成長的社會 我的母親以前會在晚餐派對上放置菸灰缸 那時黑人和白人用不同的廁所 當時人們都宣稱自己是異性戀 (觀眾笑聲) 現今,即便做得還不夠多 人類平等的革命 還是會發生 現在正在發生 未來也會發生
Thank you.
要走得多遠和多快發生都取決於我們
謝謝大家
(Applause)
(掌聲)